Another Day in Paradise
by The Lotus Black
Summary: Three years later, Shadow still has feelings for Silver. He plans on arranging a wedding for the two of them. However, there’s one thing standing in his way: Silver’s father. Sequel to Dreaming of Paradise. ShadowXSilver Contains OCs.
1. Reunited

This is a sequel to Dreaming of Paradise. You don't need to read that one to understand this. Sides, I have a nutshell for everyone:

**DoP in a Nutshellzz**

Okay, so Silver and Blaze was all sent back into time because Mephiles is this big doo-doo head that wanted to rule the world. But! When they got there, Shadow fell in love with Silver. He went to Scourge for help and for a while it was all mushy-mushy-goo-goo-love. Until! Mephiles returned to force Silver to kill Sonic. But! He was all like 'NO.' And Mephiles was all like 'YES.' And he did some shit and suddenly Blaze and Silver had to go home! But! In order to keep the one he loved with him, Shadow proposed to Silver. Then there was this really dramatic scene and the ending was all depressing because Silver went home and Shadow didn't get to say goodbye and everyone was all like 'Damnit Knuckles!'

If that didn't make much sense, as if anything ever does, go check out the last two chapters. That should be all you need to know. Anyway, enjoy.

Silver and Co. belongs to SEGA/Sonic Team.  
Doctor Finny and Scourge belong to Archie.  
This is the only time I'm putting this here.

**OMGSEQUEL!**

The sun rose to another depressing morning. It has been nearly three years since anyone has heard from their friends that had teleported to the future. Sonic the Hedgehog wasn't as concerned as the other members of the house. Eggman's attacks had finally slowed to a stop, meaning he would have a nice break to soak up the summer sun or do whatever it is mutant animals do. Rouge had decided to do something for herself as well. She requested a vacation from work and took off on a plane yesterday evening. She said that she needed to get away from the boring atmosphere.

Shadow, on the other hand, was still suffering a loss. It wasn't as bad as a year ago, but it certainly didn't get better. He worked often and refused to come home for weeks at a time. Every now and then, Sonic would begin to worry that the black hedgehog had gotten himself into trouble, but he'd always return eventually. Tails continued to work on the machine. Now that he had a sturdy tesla coil, he was positive the portal wouldn't explode like it had in the past. The only thing he needed now was the coordinates to the future. Unfortunately, that was going to be hard to find.

Silver and Blaze didn't leave anything behind. Nothing but pictures and memories. Then again, they didn't bring anything with them in the first place. Shadow had an idea though. The super computer in their office still had the white hedgehog's profile on it. He had refused to delete it.

Of course Tails was a little freaked out, but good fortune graced them when the account was hacked. Silver did indeed leave his coordinates behind in case he forgot them. Along with a folder filled with information on him. It contained basic things they already knew: his age, his likes and dislikes, his date of birth, his family, etc. Only by snooping through these files did Shadow learn what happened to the mother.

Silver didn't tell anyone, but his mother had trouble giving birth to him, and died in the process. He was an only child and refused to live with his father for some reason.

Everyone was too excited about the coordinates to read anything else. They rushed home and the portal was started up. Tails furiously typed in the numbers a repeated number of times. Eventually, it turned a red color, revealing a world devastated by fire. That was it.

"Now, before we go in, there are a few things I need to – Shadow?" Tails looked at the colors of the machine to find that the black hedgehog had already sped off into the other world.

Silver's world was nothing like back home. Buildings were toppled over, fires started and ended randomly, the ground was unstable in certain places, and there was no one to be seen. Shadow figured he was transported to another part of the city. He had no idea where to start, until he noticed a flag waving in the distance. As he approached it, he met Blaze. She had grown slightly taller and had a crown on her head. She didn't seem happy to see him. He asked her to lead him to Silver, but she refused.

"You're the last person he needs to see right now." She turned on her heel and marched her soldiers away. Eager to see his lost love, Shadow followed them. He hid behind buildings and debris to keep from being seen. Blaze whirled around ever so often, but never caught sight of him. She became suspicious. Instead of making her way back to her palace, she led him to Iblis. When the fiery demon emerged and began to attack, she fled with her servants, leaving him behind to face it.

The beast picked up a nearby building. Small bits of concrete debris fell on top of him, but he merely brushed it away. It held the structure above its head and paused before bringing it down quickly, aiming for the hedgehog. He dashed to his right, evading the attack. He crossed his arms, unimpressed. Then again, he was a monster in Silver's opinion.

After a while of quick dodging, Shadow decided he'd had enough and used his Chaos Emerald to teleport away. He took a path to his left. He searched for any sign of life. Eventually, he came across a small village in the middle of nowhere. There was a large palace north of it. He assumed Blaze was there. Having no other choice, he asked around, holding up a picture of Silver. The residents nodded and pointed to a small, two-story house. They said it belong to him.

Feeling his blood rush, Shadow immediately made his way around to the back. There he was: sitting on the grass near a garden. A basket of apples sat beside him. He was pulling out pesky weeds and didn't seem to notice when the other hedgehog snuck up behind him. Instead of hugging Silver as he had planned, he slid the basket away from him, stealing it.

After clearing the garden, Silver reached for the basket. He looked around when he found it wasn't there. The basket sat by the door that leads into the home. He sighed and stood reluctantly. However, when he picked it up, Shadow came from behind and picked him up, hugging him tightly.

At first, Silver didn't know what was going on. He thrashed wildly until he heard a familiar voice. "Hey, hey! Calm down it's me."

"Shadow!" Silver squealed and tackled the other hedgehog to the ground in a hug. "I missed you so much! Shadow!" He began to wail and buried his face in the patch of fur on Shadow's chest. He didn't mind. "Where've you been? Why didn't you visit sooner? Shadow!"

He sat up and considered pulling Silver off, but he didn't want to disrupt their embrace. "It's alright. I won't be leaving for a long time. I'm going to stay here with you." He brought his lover closer. "I won't leave you."

They remained in that position until Silver stood and led him inside the small house. It was cozy with bits and pieces of unneeded furniture everywhere. There was a couch in the living room. A table was in front of that, and bookshelves cluttered with articles and loose pages sat to the left of the sofa. Shadow was told to stay here until he returned. He heard the white hedgehog talking in the other room. He said something about his father and an unwanted visitor.

Shadow assumed this unwanted visitor was him. His heart sunk as he continued to listen. His lover told whoever he was talking to that he had to leave, no matter what. When Silver returned, he decided to pretend as if he didn't hear.

"The Doctor wants to speak with me. He's just next door. Do you want to come with me?" Shadow shrugged. His answer was taken as a 'yes' and he was pulled out of the house. "This way!" Silver playfully pulled him next door, giggling as he did.

The Doctor was in fact the same Finitevus from Shadow's time period. He hadn't changed a bit. The echidna said it was a secret that his 'family' had passed on throughout the generation. They didn't spend any time talking, as he pushed Silver into the other room to talk with him privately. About five minutes later, the Doctor returned, holding a cuff that appeared similar to Silver's. It glowed a soft color of red. He handed it to the black hedgehog.

"This will protect you from a time paradox. You'll be able to wander around in this world without having to worry about your head exploding, to say the least." He attached it to Shadow's wrist and kept the other gold band. "You won't be needing this," He pointed. "That thing acts just like your bands, so you shouldn't notice much of a difference." He sighed. "If anything happens to go wrong, contact me immediately." He shooed the two away after that, saying he had work that needed to be done.

"That's my teacher. He's kinda violent at times, but he's really nice." Silver hugged his lover. "Oh, by the way." He stepped back, hands behind him in an innocent way. "I've been waiting to tell you 'yes' for the past few years."

Shadow paused, trying to remember what the question was. When his mind couldn't come to a plausible conclusion, he shrugged. "'Yes' to what?"

The white hedgehog giggled. "This, silly." He held up his ungloved ring finger. The diamond ring Shadow had given him the night before he left was still there. His eyes lit up. "Y-Yes to marrying me?" Silver nodded.

Shadow resisted the urge to hop around in a happy dance. "There's just one problem." Damn. "Scourgey has to agree."

That's right. He'd forgotten. Scourge had traveled back before Shadow had the chance to slip through the portal. He lived on the other side of Silver's house, in a rugged shack. The green hedgehog was happy to see his friend, but wouldn't allow him inside. 'Too much of a mess,' was his excuse. He stopped Shadow before he had a chance to hug someone he hasn't seen in years.

"Whoa – No. We have to get one thing straight," He pointed to himself. "No homo." The greeting was changed to a handshake.

"Nice place. I bet it attracts a lot of women." Shadow shook his head. "How long have you been living in that dump?"

Scourge laughed. "First of all, it isn't the house that attracts," He posed. "It's this thing, baby." Silver laughed softly to himself. "Second, I've been living here for a few weeks since Ellsworth kicked me out."

"Ellsworth?" Shadow glanced at Silver, who looked away.

"You'll meet him eventually." Scourge grinned. "Anyway, I have to get back to work. Besides, don't you two have a lot of catching up to do?" He winked and disappeared back into his poor excuse for a home.

Silver huffed, hands on his hips. "What was that supposed to mean?"

"I can think of a few things." He took Silver's hands in his and pulled him close. "We do have a lot to do to fill up that, large, pulsing, three-year-void."

"Shadow! You haven't changed a bit! I'd at least think you'd grow up!" Silver's lips were captured in a quick kiss. "You're such an immature pervert!"

It wasn't until after a bit of 'catching up' that Shadow began to notice how much Silver has grown. He has grown taller and skinner. The white hedgehog's waist was slimmer, making it easier to grab hold of him during certain naughty things that won't be mentioned. He had become stronger too.

Silver had definitely changed over the past years. Not only had he gotten taller, but he seemed more educated. It wasn't as if Shadow thought he was stupid before. Idiotic maybe, but certainly not stupid. At least, not to his face. In any case, the white hedgehog had finally learned how to make his own garden and take care of it. He talked to it at times, but it only made him seem cuter. That, and Scourge helped out a bit. Well…quite a bit, actually. But, Shadow didn't care. They had pineapples. He loves pineapples.

It wasn't just the fruit that surprised him. It was the fact that Scourge could scare away Iblis to protect this village. Later on, when he talked to his fiancé, he realized it wasn't the green hedgehog, but in fact, his _father_. Shadow didn't even know he had a father. He figured he had passed away like his mother. But, he was wrong.

"I don't know, Shadow." Silver placed the pot down. He was washing the dishes at the time. "Daddy doesn't really like people staying with us. He's kinda protective over me."

Shadow chuckled. "How bad can he be?"

"Pretty bad. He's the protector of the Sol Emeralds and wants me to marry Blaze." Yeah, Shadow was going to have a big problem with this guy. "Maybe you can stay the night. But, tomorrow, first thing, you have to find somewhere else to stay."

"What? But, Silver." He wrapped his arms around the other's waist, pressing their foreheads together. "You're my fiancé. I think I have a right to hare a bed with you." They kissed. "I'm sure I can convince your father to let me stay." He weaved his fingers through his lover's quills until he was pushed away.

"Daddy isn't the type of person that is convinced easily." Silver crossed his arms. "He kicked Scourgey out."

"So, your father is the one that protects this village, and you."

The white hedgehog looked down at his feet. "Daddy knows I'm not exactly interested in girls." He buried his face in his hands, ashamed. "He thinks I'm a whore."

"That's horrible! Have you explained yourself?" He clenched his fist. "I'll to knock some-"

"Actually, I've had a couple other boyfriends since we've been apart." Shadow stood there, dumbfounded. Here he was: a person that sacrificed three years of love in order to make this moment all the more precious to him. He was hurt that his lover couldn't do the same. He was also angry. He was jealous. Silver was his fiancé. He didn't belong to anyone else.

"Who?"

He placed a finger on his chin in a thoughtful manner. "Hmm… Well, there was Mephi-"

"You dated Mephiles!?" Shadow had a disgusted and horrified expression.

"N-No… W-Well, not intentionally…"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? He almost kills us, and you turn around and date him!?"

Silver pouted, unsure of what to say. "It was Daddy's fault!"

"What? How is your father involved?"

"He's involved in everything." Shadow yelped and fell backwards. Scourge had hung himself upside from the ceiling. He decided to drop in during the middle of their conversation. "Really, Stripes? Here I thought the Ultimate Lifeform would be a little more…manly." He received a growl as a response. "Geez, no need to get your panties in a bunch." He turned to Silver. "Dad's coming home-"

Before he could finish his sentence, Silver began to freak out. "D-Daddy isn't supposed to come home until tomorrow! O-Oh! Shadow you have to hide!"

"Honestly Silver," The black hedgehog pulled himself to his feet. "I think I can handle myself." He always pictured Silver's family as nerdy, psychokinetic freaks that took to knowledge and quick thinking more so than brute force. He didn't realize how wrong he was.

* * *

I could've written this better. DX


	2. Big Daddy

Ellsworth finally makes his appearance! LOL. His name is pronounced how it's spelled: El's-worth. Or something like that. Yeah, I failed.

Ellsworth belongs to Teh Lotus.

**BOOM!HEADSHAT!**

Four and a half foot. That's how tall Silver's father was. Scourge had hauled his ass out of there in time to evade him. He had five fringes atop his head just like his son. Four larger quills, two on either side of his head, hung down and curved upward. Black markings decorated the bottom of each, giving him a tribal appearance. He had a large sword mounted on his back. The handle was gold and the blade itself seemed to glow a light shade of blue. He wore what appeared to be a strange skirt. The middle was open and the back seemed longer than the sides. It was held up by a belt with a glowing stone. He eyes were light blue, and flashed with anger when he caught sight of Shadow.

"D-Daddy! I can explain! This is-"

"Shadow the Hedgehog." He spoke in a calm voice. "I've heard plenty about you from my son. You asked him to marry you, correct?" Dumbfounded by his height, Shadow could only nod. "Tell me… You are the Ultimate Lifeform?" Another nod. Silver's father laughed. "This was the Earth's 'last hope'?"

"Don't mock me!" Shadow's ears were folded against his head.

"Please, save yourself the effort. You're useless without a Chaos Emerald, I know." He crossed his arms. "Therefore, you cannot marry my son."

"But, Daddy! Shadow and I have known each other for a long time! And, I-"

"I've heard it before. You plan on leaving in the morning, correct?" The hedgehog turned his attention to a closet to his left. He removed the sword mounted on his back and placed it on a stand inside the small room. He locked it shut. "Now then, while you're here, you might as well help us around the house."

What? Shadow was there to visit his fiancé, and now he was being put to work by his father? He didn't even know the bastard's name. Regardless, he decided to suck up his anger and help Silver with his chores. It would give them some time together. Besides, he wanted to know a little more about the white hedgehog's past relationship with Mephiles. After the dishes had been put away, the two went outside to finish cleaning the garden: disposing of rotten fruit, pulling out unwanted weeds, and collecting lemons to make lemonade later.

"Silver, you never finished telling me about Mephiles." Shadow turned to face him. Silver was on a ladder, checking out the apple tree to make sure everything was in place.

"It's a long story, really. It happened about a year ago when Daddy and I were in the city." He looked down. "Where Iblis was. I got lost from him and Mephiles helped me get home." He sighed, unsure of how Shadow was going to react. "Things just picked up from there…until Daddy found out we were together."

"What happened?"

Silver returned to the tree. He stood on his toes to reach something that was out of the ebony hedgehog's view. "Daddy scared him and Iblis away. I wasn't there to see what he did because I went to visit Blaze that day. But, when I got home, Mephiles was gone." Suddenly, he tripped, his foot slipping off the ladder.

"Silver!" Shadow caught him and moved out of the way as the ladder fell onto its side. Silver squealed, looking up into his fiancé's eyes. "I got you," He said, smiling. His lover smiled in return.

"Ahem!" Silver's father cleared his throat to get their attention. "Silver, there's someone on the phone for you." As the hedgehog went inside, his father gave Shadow a sharp glare. "Listen, I don't like you around my son."

"I apologize, Mr…"

"Ellsworth."

"Right. Mr. Ellsworth, I mean absolutely no harm to your son. I love him and I've missed him dearly over the past three years. I know you probably think I want him just for the sex, but it's more than that." The taller hedgehog didn't seem convinced. Shadow let out an angry sigh. "Alright. What's it going to take to make you like me?"

"Honor. Determination. Strength. Wisdom." Ellsworth crossed his arms. "Things you don't have."

"Oh, so you think Blaze is more fit than me?"

"Blaze is the princess. I serve her. Her parents are eager to marry my son with their daughter."

Shadow shook his head. "Wait, so Blaze doesn't want to marry Silver?"

Ellsworth shrugged. "I suppose not. But, it's not my place to decide. Nor is it yours. So, back off." Silver returned from his conversation, so the two were forced to stop their argument and return to their duties.

"Who was that, Silver?" Shadow asked, picking up a basket filled with ripe lemons.

"It was Blaze. She wants to meet me tomorrow." Silver winked. "I was thinking you could come with me." He lowered his voice so his father wouldn't hear. "Even though she really hates you, she's going to let you stay at the palace. So, when I go over for a visit we can meet up…if you know what I mean."

Shadow grinned. "Well, well. Someone has been studying vigorously. Who taught you such naughty things?"

Silver shrugged. "Experience I guess."

"Experience!? With who?" The obsidian hedgehog, having placed the basket down, crossed his arms and tapped him foot.

"Well…there were others…I mean, besides Mephiles."

"Who!?"

Silver placed a finger on his chin, trying to remember everyone. "Well, there was this really cute fox…I don't remember his name. Then there was Mephiles. Then another hedgehog, but Daddy didn't let him stay long. Then there was –"

"How many people have you been with!?"

"Just a few! There was one more…"

"I swear Silver…if it's Iblis," The white hedgehog's ears drooped. "No wonder your father is trying to protect you."

"No – Ew! That would be gross!"

* * *

After dinner, Shadow was told to stay downstairs. He would be sleeping on the couch. It was fine by him, he honestly didn't care. Ellsworth was a light sleeper, as his fiancé had said. Silver's room was on the second floor, at the far end of the hall. It would be hard for the two to meet up because of this. So, the black hedgehog snuck outside and, using his rocket-like shoes, jumped up into the window above him.

He nudged Silver awake and hugged him. "Shadow?" A finger was pushed to his lips to keep him quiet. "What are you doing?"

"I missed you." Shadow whispered, rubbing his face against Silver's. "We haven't spent enough time together." He said, nuzzling his fiancé, who was purring softly. "It's just us tonight, Silver. No one but us." He kissed his lover, pushing him down onto the bed. "I love you." The ebony hedgehog grinded his hips against the other's.

"Oh…S-Shadow!" Silver moaned quietly. "W-We can't. Not here."

"Shh," Shadow hushed him. "I want you to show me what you've learned." He growled seductively, sitting back and grinning.

About an hour into their passionate love-making, Ellsworth barged in. Silver squealed, trying to cover himself up. Shadow glared as he was pulled off the bed. "Didn't I tell you to leave him alone?" He asked, dragging the black hedgehog down the stairs and out of the house. "Get out of here! If I see you again I'll make sure you and Silver never have any contact again." He slammed the door.

Scourge poked his head out of the makeshift window. "Stripes! What the hell? It's like, three in the morning!" He shook his head and covered his eyes. "Whoa! Big daddy, put away your gun!" Shadow turned bright red. "Come on inside. You can stay here 'til morning."

The shack wasn't as small as Shadow thought it was. It was a bit messy on the inside with loose papers and books here and there. He was given the bed in another room in the back. Scourge said he had other things to do, and would most likely stay up for the remainder of the night. He promised to keep quiet so the hedgehog could get some rest. After all, he had a big day tomorrow. If Blaze wouldn't allow him to stay in her palace, he would be forced to return to his time period and leave his fiancé behind.

* * *

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - Thanks for the review! I'm not going to give anything away about Mephiles, so you'll just have to wait on that. XD

shadilverluvr - LOL I agree! If my dad did that, I'd kick him in the nads so hard his voice would be as high as Silver's. Thanks for reviewing!


	3. Cooking up Promises

I didn't proof read this chapter, so if there are some obvious mistakes, please let me know and I'll fix 'em up.

The rating might have to be upped due to Scourge's mouth. Still deciding on that, so for now just ignore his vulgar language.

I'm now accepting fan characters for short cameo appearances. I suppose this chapter could be an example, since Sky is a cameo appearance and whatnot. Anyway, if you're interested, please **message** me and I'll try to fit him/her in.

Sky the Hedgehog belongs to Shadilverluvr.

**OMGWTFFATALFRAME3!1!!**

Blaze seemed to be in a better mood than the day before. Shadow assumed she was going through PMS and decided not to bring up their meeting. She looked extremely bored, and for a moment he almost felt sorry for her, until he remembered that he hated her. She had told the white hedgehog on the phone that he would be allowed to stay, but there's always a catch. Before she could explain herself, Silver burst out in giggles, shouting about his marriage. She seemed surprised at first, but eventually laughed. Shadow was embarrassed beyond comprehension.

"It's going to be wonderful! That is…if we can convince Daddy." He returned to his normal, calm self. "If you really don't mind having him here as a guest, I'd like him to stay." He turned to Shadow and winked. "I promise to visit every day if possible."

She nodded, agreeing to her friend's plan. "You've learned a lot from the Doctor, haven't you?" He smiled. "By giving the excuse that you're going to visit me, Ellsworth should let his guard down for a bit. He'll be easier to manipulate."

"I believe that he'll be angry, not manipulative. Seriously Blaze, if you found out your kid was sleeping around with someone who he was forbidden to, wouldn't you be pissed?" Scourge was standing beside Shadow, who didn't notice his presence until now.

"Scourge!" Blaze stood from her throne, angry. "How the hell did you get in here?"

He grinned. "Baby, Scourgey is where ever the topless chicks are."

"You leave my servants alone!"

"You have shirtless servants!?"

"Damnit Shadow, not you too!"

"But-" Silver cleared his throat, getting Shadow's attention. He tapped his foot, glaring at the other hedgehog. "I would never. After all, I have a beautiful fiancé." He put on a fake smile. Unfortunately, his lover saw through this.

"Shadie, I think I've known you for long enough to know when you're faking." He sighed. "I can't believe you're turning straight on me. Just for a few of Blaze's servants."

Scourge leaned toward Shadow, whispering in his ear, "They have big nipples."

The ebony hedgehog backed away. "That's so vulgar!" Scourge snickered.

After the green nuisance had been forced out of the castle's perimeter, Blaze and Silver began to discuss more important matters. Shadow would be getting a room on the third floor, away from the servants. She would make sure he remained loyal to the white hedgehog. They also decided to put him to work, since Silver believed laziness was a bad trait for a new husband. He detested cleaning, so the two agreed on putting him to work in the kitchen.

Silver said learning how to cook would be a valuable skill. He would learn how to properly wash, dry, and organize dishes. He would learn how to use a knife for purposes other than killing, and he would learn how to prepare a decent meal. Blaze agreed. She said it would also give him something to do throughout the day. And, if Ellsworth ever chose to make a surprise appearance, he would already be out of the way.

So it was settled. Shadow would pretend to return home and instead hide in the palace. He would be able to meet up with his fiancé every night until Ellsworth accepted him as a reliable husband. He was fine with it, except for the cooking part. He _hated_ cooking. The last time he ever touched a frying pan it exploded, and that was _before_ he put it in the microwave. Rouge still teases him about it to this day, saying 'Metal and heat don't mix Shadow! Blah blah pan blah blah egg blah stove blah blah blah!'

After he had kissed his fiancé goodbye, he was shown to the kitchen and basically thrown to the wolves. Not literally of course. That would be a horrible pun if the head chef was really a wolf. It's just too predicable. The chef was surprising a girl. Shadow expected to see a really mean cat with devils horns instead of ears, and fire coming out of his mouth whenever he talked. She smiled at him as he greeted her. She seemed nice enough. She was a short, white hedgehog with stripes that changed from yellow to red every time she looked back at the boiling pot behind her.

"W-What are you doing?"

"I'm being silly, let me introduce myself. I'm Sky. And if this water doesn't boil _now_, I'm going to kill it." She blinked when she noticed the strange look she received from Shadow. "You're cute. I haven't seen you around before. Are you new?"

His ears flattened against his head. "You could say that."

"So, what's your name?"

"It's Shadow." She paused. Silence filled the room as he tried to figure out what he said wrong.

"No, really. What's your name?" He gave her a blank look. He didn't respond. "I asked you a question," She crossed her arms. "I expect an answer."

"My name is Shadow the Hedgehog."

After it processed through her brain a second time, she perked up. "Oh! You're Silver's fiancé, aren't you?" Damn, word spread fast. She snapped her fingers. "Crud. I wanted to take you out on a date." She stared at him for a moment. "By the way, what do you want?"

He sighed, not really wanting to tell her. He had no choice. If he didn't, Blaze would kick him out. "I'm here to learn how to cook." He mumbled.

Sky's eyes lit up. "I get to be a teacher? Yay! I've always wanted to pass down my skills! Follow me!" She twirled around and gathered a large container filled with various forks, knives, spoons, plates, and bowels. "Here!" She handed them to Shadow, who held the heavy thing with ease. "To the dining table!" She pushed an empty trolley out the double doors.

The dinning table was overly decorated. Unlit candles and skinny vases with single roses in them sat in the middle. They were perfectly aligned. The table itself was covered with a large, white cloth. It reminded him of Silver. He dazed off until Sky stepped on his foot. "Ouch! Was that necessary?"

"Shaddup and listen." She placed a plate on a colored mat. Then she placed a folded napkin onto the empty platter. "Now," Her words sounded monotonous to Shadow, who was having a flashback at the most random of times. "Blah blah blah blah triangle napkin blah blah salad fork blah spoon blah blah blah knife blah blah. Hey. Are you listening to me? Hey!" She slapped him, snapping him back into reality.

"What the hell?" He glared at her and held the side of his face where he was struck.

"Don't do that again. It freaks me out." He was forced to listen to her. She showed him which fork went where, and which spoon to parallel to said fork. She then told him of their routine. They cleaned dishes daily and began the actual cooking process a couple hours before the meal was scheduled. That meant Shadow had to get up at five in the morning to work. The good thing about it was they were allowed to eat anything that had been burnt. For some reason, he had taken a liking to singed food, seeing as how he could never figure out how long to keep the food in the oven.

After he was shown the ropes by a rather short-tempered hedgehog, he was taken to his room. It wasn't exactly as fancy as he imagined. There was a bed in the corner and a walk-in closet on the opposite wall. He had a small desk to the left of the door. Honestly, he had expected something a little fancier. At least it was better than Silver's condition. The poor boy had to live with that controlling father. His heart sunk every time he thought about it.

Blaze burst into his room unexpectedly. "Hey!" He nearly fell off his bed. "You got a visitor. Make it quick, Ellsworth is going to be here soon."

"What does he do –" He was cut off by having the door slammed in his face. His ears flattened against his head. "Bitch." It opened again, and for a moment he thought Blaze had heard him, but it was Silver.

"Shadow!" He was tackled in a hug and pushed down onto the bed. "I missed you!"

"It hasn't been that long, Silver." The white hedgehog pouted. "I have some questions to ask you." He sat up and his fiancé took a seat beside him. "What does your father do in the palace?"

Silver shrugs. "I guess he does anything that Blaze wants him to. A couple years ago, he was too busy guarding the emeralds, which is one of the reasons why I couldn't live with him. Since he scared everyone away, Daddy doesn't really protect the emeralds as much."

Shadow shook his head. "I can't believe how rude your father is."

"What do you mean?" Silver tilted his head.

"I mean, how your father calls you these vulgar names and just seemed to control your life." The white hedgehog looked down at his lap. Shadow cocked an eyebrow.

"I have something to tell you. I lied."

"You lied? About what?"

"Everything." He sighed. "Daddy never called me that. No father should. I made it all up to make you jealous."

Shadow chuckled. "Jealous? What do you mean by that?"

"Well, it's just that you're really attractive…and, I'm not." He leaned his head against his lover's shoulder. "I honestly thought you would've forgotten about me in the three years we've been apart. I thought you found someone better than me. I just wanted you to love me like before."

He was dumbfounded. Shadow never expected to hear him say anything of the sort. He did agree with some things: he was extremely attractive, but maybe that was just his ego. "Silver, don't say something like that." The white hedgehog looked up. "If I knew I was going to be interested in someone else I wouldn't ask you to marry me." He pulled his lover into another hug.

"Really?" Silver's ears folded against his head. "No one has ever treated me this nice…not even Blaze." He smiled brightly. "We'll be together forever, right?"

Shadow nodded. "Together forever."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

* * *

Pokelad - Yes! Sonic is still obsessed with Scourgey. Thanks for the review!

shadilverluvr - LOL I totally agree with you. Shadow is such a naughty hedgie. Thanks for reviewing and allowing me to use Sky. I hope I did everything correctly. XD


	4. Scourge's Training 1

OMFG. I tried to update sooner, but I got like...REALLY sick. For no fricken reason too. Got better randomly as well. It's all apart of this weird-ass disease I have. It sucks ballsack. Anyway! Enjoy this new chapter thing...it's rather random.

**OMGTHISISANEWCHAPTER**

Shadow had convinced his fiancé to spend the night with him, regardless of what Ellsworth would do to them. The alarm blared at five in the morning. It startled both of them. Silver was the first to react, squealing and throwing the blanket over his head. The black hedgehog merely looked around and pressed a button to cease the sound.

He unburied Silver. "Are you alright?"

"Loud noises scare me…"

After the white hedgehog had gathered his nerves together, he took his leave. Before he did, he promised to return around lunch so they could spend time with each other. Shadow, not wanting to grace Sky with his presence, decided to take a long shower instead of reporting to work.

While he was drying his quills, he blindly stepped back into his room and bumped into someone. He peeked out from under the towel and met Ellsworth's tall gaze. He yelped in fright and fell onto his backside. "How did you get in here? I locked the door!"

"You didn't do a very good job." He pointed. Shadow noticed that the door handle had been torn off. "Is there any specific reason why you want to marry my son?"

He stood, taking the towel with him. "I love Silver."

Ellsworth held up his hand, stopping Shadow from saying anymore. "Let me rephrase that: Why do you continue to stay here when you know this marriage isn't going to happen?"

Shadow growled. "The only marriage that isn't happening is the one between Silver and Blaze." Ellsworth crossed his arms. "I'd at least think you'd be happy that your son is marrying the Ultimate Lifeform. That's a hard title to come by," He grinned. "Do you want to know why they call me that?"

Silver's father didn't seem impressed. "Very well. If it's a competition you want, then you'll get one." Shadow's ears folded against his head. He didn't remember saying anything about a contest. "Next week." It was Ellsworth's turn to grin. "You better be prepared, little man."

* * *

"You challenged Ellsworth to a fight!?" Somehow Scourge had found a way to bypass Blaze's security and guards. Apparently it wasn't that hard, as he says he does it quite often. He was leaning against the wall across from Shadow, who was on his bed. "Do you have any idea how hard you're going to get your ass kicked?"

The black hedgehog glared. "Thanks for the support." He sighed, burying his head under the pillow. "How can I beat him? He's a monster."

"Cheer up, Stripes! I have an idea!" A bright beam of victory light shone upon him as he posed. "I've fought Ellsworth before! I'll train you!"

Shadow looked up. "Did you beat him?"

"Well…not exactly." The black hedgehog groaned and covered his head. "C'mon! I know all of his moves! He's not that hard! You're the Ultimate Lifeform! Have some guts!"

He finally sat up. "Maybe you're right." He paused, reminiscing. "But…remember the last time we went through something like this?" Scourge shrugged. "I believe it was titled 'Dr. Love's Dating Guide'."

The green hedgehog laughed wildly. "Aww shit, I remember that."

"And, the end result was…" Scourge's ears drooped.

"Alright fine! We'll go see if the Doctor has anything that can help."

Seeing as how Ellsworth already knew of Shadow's existence, they were free to visit Finitevus. He was busy working on an unfamiliar contraption outside and didn't seem to notice the two when they approached him. The black hedgehog peered into the house next door, only to find that Silver wasn't at home. Scourge tapped the Doctor on the shoulder, making him jump.

"Goodness! What is it?" He glared, cleaning the oil off of his hands.

"Stripes here challenged Elly to a fight." The Doctor didn't seem surprised. "He doesn't want me to train him for some reason. Can you do something?"

Shadow wandered over to them, completely oblivious to their conversation. "Where's Silver?"

"I believe he went to town to pick up a package." Finitevus abandoned his work and led the duo to an open field. If it could be called that. It lacked grass and life for that matter. "Ellsworth will be an awfully hard opponent for someone of your height."

Shadow narrowed his eyes. "That's comforting to know."

The Doctor went on to explain the sword that Silver's father carried around. It was called the 'Chaos Blade' and made the user immune to Chaos Control as well as a few other things. According to Finitevus, it was made from energy that had been released from the Chaos Emeralds when they were destroyed. Their destruction caused the birth of the Sol Emeralds and the sword that Ellsworth owned. Shadow didn't listen to the rest of the legend because he seriously didn't give a damn anymore.

"Honesty Shadow. You won't get anywhere if you continuously ignore the people around you." He said, tugging on one of Shadow's ears to get his attention. "Why don't we skip to the training? Ellsworth is rather quick, so Scourge can help you with agility. I know someone who can help you improve your strength."

Shadow stopped the echidna before he could say anymore. "Could we continue this after lunch?"

"Certainly. But, why-"

The black hedgehog headed back to Silver's house, ignoring the two who were dumbfounded. "Stripes always does that. He'll come around eventually."

"I really wish people would listen to me more often." He turned to Scourge. "In the meantime, I have a favor to ask of you."

* * *

"Silver!" He burst through the door, taking note of a bag full of groceries atop the kitchen table. "Silver?" He peeked into another room. Seeing no sign of life, he headed up the stairs and knocked on his fiancé's closed door. "Silver? Are you in there?"

A moment later, the white hedgehog opened the door and revealed himself. "Ta-Da!" He was wearing a light blue kimono with gold trimmings. It had a dark blue pattern and matched his cuffs. A blue ribbon was tied in the front. Shadow cocked an eyebrow. "What do you think?" He twirled around, showing off his new outfit. "Amy sent it to me!"

"I thought you didn't get along with her." His eyes were distracted by the ribbon that was snuggly tied around his lover's waist. "Aren't you supposed to tie the ribbon in the back?"

Silver posed and looked down. "I guess. But, the thing is –" He was cut off by a gasp. "Shadow!" His fiancé had pulled an end of the ribbon, untying it. The white hedgehog tried to cover himself up, but Shadow had already slipped his hands into the kimono.

"Your fur is soft." He whispered, gently rubbing his hands up and down Silver's waist. Shadow pulled his lover into a passionate kiss. The left sleeve of the kimono slid off his fiancé's shoulder. He decided to remove the clothing completely and led the white hedgehog into the room, turning off the light as he did. "I love you."

"S-Shadow…" His voice trailed off as the darker hedgehog nuzzled his neck. "Silver likey…" He moaned softly and wrapped his arms around his lover's shoulders. "Are you going to make me feel good?"

"You have no idea." Shadow purred, gently nibbling on Silver's ear.

* * *

"But, I didn't get to eat!" Shadow huffed and crossed his arms, receiving an uncaring stare from Dr. Finitevus. "It's not my fault Silver distracted me."

"You were the one that wanted to have sex!" Silver said, having had enough of being blamed for everything. The Doctor's gaze exchanged between the two as they argued.

"Me!? You were the one that seduced me!" Scourge's ears drooped.

"Just because I tried on a kimono!?"

"You know cute hedgehogs in kimonos are my one weakness!"

"Stop yelling at me!"

"Stop being so damn cute!"

"I can't! It's in my blood! You just need to lay off the testosterone!"

"I can't! I'm a male!"

"Then lay off the sex!"

"I love you too much!"

"That's a lie!"

"Then why do you think I want to marry you!?"

Silver paused, squealing. "Oh gosh! That's so sweet!" He caught Shadow in a tight hug. "I love you too!"

"Stripes! Focus! We need to get you back into shape before Ellsworth realizes that we're helping you." Scourge pulled the black hedgehog away by his ear, ignoring the complaints. The Doctor followed them.

"If he comes home I'll distract him. Good luck Shadow!" Silver waved and returned to his room to find his father standing in the doorway. "Ah! D-Daddy! W-What?"

Ellsworth sighed. "I don't mind you helping Shadow. In my opinion, he needs all the help he can get. Just," He paused, shaking his head. "Keep him out of the house from now on."

"Y-Yes Daddy."

* * *

Pokelad - Yeah...Sonic can get quite obsessive. Thanks for the review! XD

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Wow. That's a long review. Thanks for it! XD I totally agree with you on, like, everything. Sorry about Paranoia. It's really different from this one. Anyway, thanks for making me laugh. I always like reading what you have to say. XD

Midnight Storm the Hedgedna - Stop noming me, damnit! LOLJK. Thankies for reviewing and I luffs you!

shadilverluvr - Uh, I guess I did the stripe chaning thing because it's a unique part of her personality or something. I dunno. Thanks for reviewing! XD


	5. Finny's Training 2

I'm still accepting your fan characters for cameo appearances. Message me if you're interested.

I wanted to post this sooner, but I was in the hospital. Yes, I spent my birthday there and it was very crappy. Anyway, I didn't proofread this, so if anyone finds something wrong with it...like, any obvious typos, please let me know.

Morpheus is a character that I made up for another story. But, it didn't turn out so well, so he makes a small appearances here.

**OHMAGAWDFATALRAME**

Shadow was dragged back to the open field to start his agility training. Since the Doctor and Scourge both knew of Ellsworth's strategies, they could teach him appropriately. However, the black hedgehog didn't agree with some of the methods they had thought of: shooting flaming arrows at him, taking his green Chaos Emerald away from him and having him face Iblis, letting loose a dozen rabid squirrels to chase him around a secluded room, or having Blaze get pissed at him for some random reason. None of the choices sounded pleasant to him.

"Alright, we'll go with the arrows then." The albino echidna handed a bow and arrows to Scourge. "Dodge all of them unless you want your fur burned off."

The green hedgehog patted his friend's shoulder. "Trust me, you don't want that. It hurts like a bitch. And, knowing you, you won't grow it back as quick as me."

Shadow narrowed his eyes, brushing Scourge's hand away. "I don't intend on being hit."

"Really? Because I'm going to be shooting three at the same time." The black hedgehog gave him a dumbfounded look. "I'll give you a three second head start."

"How are you going to –"

"Three, two…" He jumped and ducked as one of the flaming arrows flew over his head. He reacted quickly to evade the second one, but in doing so his side was caught by the third one. "Aw, c'mon Stripes! You can do better than that!"

"Screw you!"

This manner of dodging and cursing continued on for quite some time. After every hour, the Doctor would tell Shadow the things he was doing wrong, and how to improve his skills. Eventually, he was able to barely slip through Scourge's dead accuracy. It was dusk by the time the trio had agreed that he was ready to evade Ellsworth's mighty sword.

"Wake up early tomorrow and meet up with Scourge outside the palace. He'll take you to your next training area." Finitevus stood and made his leave.

Shadow was out of breath and Scourge was too busy laughing. "C'mon Stripes. It wasn't that hard. We've got plenty of time. Sides, you learn quick, unlike Silver." He chuckled to himself.

"Speaking of Silver, you think he could fix us something to eat?"

Scourge seemed taken back by the other hedgehog's question. "Eh? But, you're the Ultimate Lifeform! Completely immortal and ageless. What the hell do you need food for?"

Shadow sighed. He always hated telling people that he did need some sort of nutrition and source of energy. Yes, he could use his Chaos Emerald, but it made him appear less odd by eating. A meal a day usually does the trick, unless he wastes most of his energy by dodging flaming arrows. "It doesn't matter. I just really want something to eat." Scourge agreed, and the two made their way back to Silver's home. Ellsworth was there. He took pity upon the duo and allowed them inside for dinner.

He also had the nerve to ask Shadow how confident he feels about their upcoming competition. "There's a lot at stake for you if you lose. I hope you're paying attention to what Finitevus is telling you."

Trying to maintain his cool, the black hedgehog refused to make eye contact or even speak with Silver's father. It was hard at times: he couldn't be around his fiancé long enough to start a decent conversation.

"If your father doesn't back off…" He clenched his fist and growled to himself. Silver smiled, rubbing his lover's back to calm him.

"Shadow, I know you can beat him! Trust me," He paused, sighing. "Sometimes Daddy just needs to be whacked around a bit to have some sense knocked into him. After this fight, he'll see that you and I are perfect for each other!" He hugged Shadow.

He wasn't as enthusiastic about being hugged as he used to be. "I just want him to leave us alone."

"I know." Silver leaned back on the couch, holding his lover's hand. "But, we can't get rid of him. He is my Daddy after all."

Shadow sighed. "I guess you're right."

There was a brief pause between the two. Silver open his mouth to say something, but Scourge barged in. He waved his arms wildly, yelling something about a black creature causing destruction up the road. Shadow didn't seem interested. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against his fiancé's shoulder.

"Stripes! Get up! This will be perfect for your training!" He tugged on the black hedgehog's arm. "C'mon! Before Ellsworth overhears!"

Silver grabbed Shadow's other arm, trying to keep him on the couch. "Scourgey! Can't you take care of it?" He pouted. "We were spending time together!"

"This'll help him prepare for next week!" The two started tugging on Shadow. They shouted at each other, catching Ellsworth's attention.

"What are you two doing?" He pried them apart, giving Shadow room to breathe. "What is going on?"

Before any words could be exchanged, Scourge snatched Shadow's arm and led him out of the house. "No offense Stripes, but this is important." He explained the situation while they made their way to the destroyed home. A black creature that attacks at night has terrorized a few select people in the village. So far, Ellsworth hasn't done much to help them. It was up to Shadow to calm the beast. Not only would it give him publicity, but he would have something to shove in the bastard's face.

People were screaming in fear. It was hard to believe their shouts couldn't be heard near Silver's house. Scourge pushed his friend toward one of the houses. The ebony hedgehog barged through the door, immediately making eye contact with the demon. It looked exactly like Dark Sonic, and for a moment, Shadow thought it was. Until the creature melted into a black puddle and began to take the shape of giant worm-like monster.

He stepped back. When the creature attacked, he dashed out of the home, screaming bloody murder. "Holy shit!" Scourge smacked his forehead, disappointed. "Rape!" He lured the worm a safe distance away from the people before using Chaos Control. It stopped in mid-air, giving him time to relax. He snapped his fingers, releasing the monster. It dove head-first into a large rock, morphing back to its hedgehog form.

"Stripes, go for the head!" The green hedgehog was shouting advice from a safe distance. He didn't want to get involved, as he wanted Shadow to gain the victory himself, but he was close enough just in case his friend got into trouble.

The creature roared, it teeth dripping with what appeared to be blood. Shadow's ears flattened against his head. He didn't like the sight. It charged toward him. Having no time to react, he was hit and thrown a couple feet away. He landed on his feet, dust gathering near his feet where he had skidded to a stop.

Shadow growled, cracking his knuckles. He clenched his fist and, using his shoes, propelled forward at a high speed. Silver jumped out in front of him, arms outstretched. "No!" The black hedgehog tried to stop. He tripped and fell onto his backside.

"Silver! What the hell?"

He squealed, hugging the monster. "Don't attack him!"

"But-"

"I'm sorry! I forgot to put Morpheus on his leash." He patted the demon on its head. Its small tail began to wag. Shadow was still seated on the floor, confused. "Oh, I haven't introduced you two yet. This is Morpheus!" He smiled at the creature. "This is Silver's husband." He shook a finger at it. "We don't attack Silver's husband. That's a bad Morphy."

The creature's ears flattened, as if it was disappointed with itself. Scourge helped his friend to his feet, amazed by Morpheus, as it was called. "Whoa! Where did you get this thing?" He tapped its nose. It shook its head and sneezed. "It's so realistic."

Silver smiled, enjoying the attention. "Finitevus gave him to me for my eighteenth birthday. Isn't he adorable?"

"When he's not trying to kill you." Shadow said, walking over to it. Morpheus hissed at him.

"I don't think he likes you Stripes." Scourge stepped back, hand on his chin in a thoughtful manner. "This gives me an idea."

"As long as it doesn't involve using this thing to help with my training." Shadow sighed, noticing the grin on the green hedgehog's face. "I hate it when I'm right."

* * *

Holy crap. I had a lot of reviews. Thanks everyone!

Pokelad - Yes! I shall bring Sonic back just for you! I think I might want to spend a chapter or two focusing on them as a couple as well. Thanks for the review!

TheRoastedChicken - Thanks! Yeah, sometimes I don't know what to say either, but at lest you added more than one word. Good job. XD

shadilverluvr - LOL I'd do the same as Sky. Thanks for reviewing!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Yay! Long reviews that go on forever! That means I can read them forever! Wewt. Sorry to hear your power went out like that. And, yes! I shall marry you! But, didn't we already get married? Thanks for reviewing!

My.life.as.a.caricature - Whoa, geez. Thank you! I just wish my teachers thought I was brillant.

Midnight Storm the Hedgedna - I'm totally jacking the 'Maria' thing. Actually, I think I already did. No Shadow and Silver love sex? Like, not even like how it was in the game? I R SAD LOL Thanks for reviewing!

Laughter in the Dark - Glad you like it! And, I think I've seen some of your art. You're an awesome artist! Thansk for all the reviews!

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - That's what I was going for! Thanks for reviewing!


	6. Finny's Training 3

Still accepting fan characters for cameo appearances.

I'm really sorry SilverHeartsInTheNight34. I was going to wait longer for a response on the conformation I sent, but I'm being an impatient asshole this week. If there's anything you want me to change about your character's role, please tell me. (I don't think I did very well to being with.) Again, sorry about that. XD

Anyway, I really like this chapter for some reason.

Vulgra belongs to SilverHeartsInTheNight34.

**HOLYSNAPI'MRUNNINGOUTOFTITLEIDEAS**

Shadow was peacefully sleeping on the couch. He didn't notice the time, and was woken by his fiancé's pet. It sat on him, head tilted to the side. At first he didn't know what it was. When his vision came to, he screamed and fell off the side. His head bumped against the table, causing him to curse loudly. Morpheus melted into an almost exact copy of Shadow. It mimicked his actions and mocked him.

"Silver! Your pet is going to die!" He reached for the creature, but it melted into a black puddle. "Damnit! Get back here!" He chased it around until he ran into Ellsworth. The impact caused the father to spill his coffee. "S-Sorry!"

"It's quite alright." He tried to brush the stain off his fur. "Silver," He called, sighing. "Morpheus has to stay outside from now on."

The white hedgehog finally answered the two. He dashed downstairs and hugged his black monster…thing. He was wearing the kimono Amy had given to him. "But, Daddy! Morphy is allergic to sunlight!" Morpheus seemed happy in Silver's grasp. Its tail was wagging. "You can't do that to him!"

"Silver." His father spoke sternly. "Coffee stains are very hard to remove."

"Daddy! You're so mean!"

Shadow watched as the two family members argued. Ellsworth refused to allow that creature into his home, but his son whined about how it would melt if out in the sun too long. Their conversation immediately stopped when Silver began to pout. His father looked away, arms crossed.

"D-Daddy." The white hedgehog's bottom lip quivered. "Pwease?"

"Pouting will not work, Silver." He turned back to his son. "You can not get everything you want like that." He paused. "S-Stop it!"

Tears began to fill Silver's eyes. "But…Daddy."

Ellsworth covered his eyes. "Stop!" He finally gave up. "Alright! He can stay until Scourge builds him a place outside." Silver squealed happily and dragged Morpheus up the stairs. He let out a sigh of relief and turned to Shadow. "Don't look at the pout. One look and it'll get you."

"Stripes!" Scourge had found a way to unlock the front door. "C'mon! Training time!"

Shadow didn't feel like doing anything psychically demanding at the moment. He was going to use Ellsworth as an excuse, but he had already left into another room. "Aw, geez. I'd love to, but…Silver needs me to help him."

Scourge tilted his head. "Help with what? Removing his clothes or something?" He chuckled to himself.

"…Sure." Not convinced, the green hedgehog grabbed Shadow by his arm and dragged him next door. Finitevus was busying examining a large cylinder container.

"Hey, Finny. We're ready!" The echidna turned to them, placing down a clipboard. Shadow's ears twitched with interest, but he was dragged away again by his energetic green friend. "You're going to be training with Morpheus. But, since I have some unfinished business to take care of, Vulgra will help you."

"W-Who?" Scourge saluted and sped off, leaving Shadow in the middle of the same open field where he had arrows shot at him. He looked around. No sign of life could be seen. After a minute or two of waiting, he was beginning to think that the green hedgehog had left him out here to die. A few minutes later, he was tackled to the ground by Morpheus. He screamed. "What the hell!?"

He looked up to find someone he's never seen before. He looked rather young and had bangs covering part of his face. His fur was black and red. Shadow was reminded of himself, mostly because of the tuft of white fur on his chest, but he immediately changed his mind when he noticed the boy's shoes. Why does everyone wear those ridiculous biker boots? Scourge has them… Hell, Silver will probably start wearing them soon. Wait…No, Silver's gay – He wouldn't wear those.

"You're not going to accomplish anything on the ground." Shadow realized he had just embarrassed himself by being pinned down by Morpheus. He jumped to his feet, knocking the monster off his back. "I'm –"

"Vulgar."

"No, Vulgra."

"I thought it was Vulgar."

"It's Vulgra."

"But –"

"Morpheus!" The black and red hedgehog pointed to Shadow. "Sic him!"

"Shit!" Shadow danced around as the demon morphed into a black version of Ellsworth. It attacked him with a sword that appeared similar to the Chaos Blade. The damn thing was fast, but not fast enough. The obsidian hedgehog knocked Morpheus down within the first five minutes. Vulgra clapped.

"Good job. But, that was just a warm up." He grinned. "Right, Morpheus?" The monster nodded, setting its blank eyes upon its target.

For the next couple of hours, Shadow was having his ass handed to him. Vulgra was actually more help that he first expected. Although young, he was rather skilled when it came to predicting his opponent's moves. But, he seemed to enjoying torturing his student more than helping him.

"Shadow!" Vulgra was standing now. "Look out behind you!" Being the partly paranoid person that he was, Shadow glanced over his shoulder. As he did, Morpheus came from the front, kicking him in the abdomen. "Ha! Gotcha!"

Eventually, he became fed up with these tricks, and let his anger get the best of him. "That's it! I can't stand you anymore!" He began to chase Vulgra around. But, his stamina had been worn out from all the beatings he received from Morpheus, so he wasn't exactly determined to catch the black and red hedgehog. After about ten minutes of running around, he gave up.

"This is all the Ultimate Lifeform has to offer?" Vulgra crossed his arms, shaking his head. "You'll never beat Ellsworth if you aren't determined to." Shadow knew the European hedgehog was right. If he didn't have the guts to learn how to face his fiancé's father, he would never get married to Silver. And, the poor hedgehog would have to spend the rest of his life with Blaze. Ah, maybe he'd focus more after 'lunch'.

* * *

Vulgra decided to make his leave to seek out Scourge, who he said was planning on destroying part of Blaze's castle. Shadow didn't mind. He never liked that bitchy princess anyway. Morpheus couldn't follow the black hedgehog back to Silver's home due to the sunlight. It really didn't make much sense, seeing as how this part of their world was partly covered with black clouds from Iblis.

When he arrived home, Ellsworth had gone to answer a distress call from the king. Silver was still in his blue kimono. He was preparing what appeared to be a tray of rice balls, sushi, dumplings, and other Asian food that Shadow didn't care about. He startled his lover by grabbing him from behind and kissing the back of his ear.

"Shadow! You scared me." Silver smiled brightly. "How was your training?"

"Horrible."

"Aww, poor thing." Silver wrapped his arms around Shadow's shoulders. "Maybe I can help you feel better?"

The ebony hedgehog grinned. "Oh? Can you, now?"

Before their actions could become intimate, there was a knock at the door. Shadow groaned. Silver pushed his fiancé away and winked. "I'll be back." He opened the door with a bright smile. It instantly faded when he saw who was at the door.

"Hi Silver!" He practically cringed at the high-pitched voice. Amy pushed him aside and twirled into his home. She was wearing a pink and red kimono. It was identical to Silver's. She bounced into the room and hugged Shadow.

"No!" Shadow pushed her away. "Cute hedgehog in kimono!" He locked himself in the bathroom.

Silver tapped her on the shoulder, hands on his hips. "Any particular reason why you're here?" His tone didn't sound the least bit happy.

She glared at him, arms crossed. "I came to see the competition between Shadow and Ellsworth."

Huh? Whoa, wait…how the hell did she find out? Silver nodded his head, knowing who told her: Scourge.

* * *

Pokelad - Thanks for the review! Uh...I don't really have any other response. XD

TheRoastedChicken - I agree with you. Ultimate-ness for the win! Thanks for reviewing!

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - Yes, Morpheus is rather interesting. Thanks for the review! XD

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Wow, this review was rather short. But, I still enjoyed reading from my...wife x2? Thanks!

shadilverluvr - I'd love to have a Morphy of my own too. I'd make him do my homework, but if he's anything like me, he'd just eat it or something. Thanks for reviewing!

MysticMelodyz - Thanks! If Elly really existed: you all would have a problem and I'd be rich from making short appearances in video games with him. XD


	7. Pancakes

Still accepting fan characters for cameo appearances.

I don't really like this chapter for some reason. DX

**NINJAGAIDENLOL**

Outraged, Silver broke away from his argument with Amy to visit the green hedgehog next door. Scourge had an apron on. It was covered with what appeared to be covered in oil. "…It's not what it looks like. I'm fixing...something."

Silver clapped his hands together. "Oh! You look so cute!" He took hold of the end of the apron. "It's so frilly and soft and-"

Scourge growled. "What do you want?" He took the apron off before anyone else had the chance to make fun of him. Silver asked him about Amy's entrance and how she knew about the fight taking place tomorrow. The green hedgehog laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Well, I went back to the past and sold tickets."

"Tickets?" Silver wasn't surprised. Scourge does this type of stuff all the time. "How much were they worth?"

"I sold them for ten bucks each."

The white hedgehog glanced back at his house to make sure his father wasn't around to hear. "Can I have fifty percent of the money you earned?"

Scourge was taken back. He never figured Silver would be the type to ask for money in such a way. Not that he minded – He treated the young hedgehog like his own brother. The only problem he had was the large chunk he wanted out of the profits. "Fifty percent!? Can't you settle for thirty? I need that money for food!"

"I'll make you lunch for a month. No charge." Damn. He drives a hard bargain.

"Alright fine." He dug in the pocket of his jacket and pulled out a wad of cash. He counted the bills and handed Silver a few. "Here." He put the apron back on. "Now leave me be! I'm very busy!"

"Don't forget about tomorrow, Scourgey!" Silver smiled and counted the money he received.

Inside the small shack, Scourge grinned to himself. "Don't tell Silver, but I charged them twenty for the tickets." Oh, you sneaky little beast.

* * *

When Silver returned home, he nearly dropped the money in his hand due to the scene in front of him. Amy was hugging his fiancé. _His_ husband. Shadow didn't seem too happy. He pushed her off when he caught sight of the white hedgehog.

"Silver," He paused, taking a deep breath and knowing what was coming. "Amy wants to spend the night with u-"

"What!?" Ellsworth closed the door that led into the kitchen so he could get some peace. Unfortunately, Silver was yelling a little to loud for this 'peace' to be achieved. "That bitch is not spending the night here!"

"Why not!? It's not like you two do anything intimate with each other!" Silver cocked an eyebrow. Not only was this pink hedgehog annoying, she was also stupid. "Besides, I'm more supportive of Shadow than you'll ever be."

Silver narrowed his eyes. He glanced at Shadow, who shrugged. "Okay Amy, I'm sorry. You can spend the night here."

She crossed her arms, smirking. "That's more like it. I want a room upstairs with a nice comfy bed and pink sheets that match my fur."

Silver spoke calmly, but anger was still apparent in his voice. "Sure thing Amy. I'll do that for you." She winked at Shadow and walked up the steps to pick out the room she wanted. "Morpheus, Silvy has a favor to ask." A black puddle formed at his fiancé's feet, making his step make in sudden shock. It changed into its regular form and sat at the white hedgehog's feet.

He whispered something to his pet. Morpheus melted back into a puddle and sunk into the floor. Shadow was a bit disgusted by the sight. When it returned, it was holding a bucket of pink paint. The color matched Amy's fur. Silver dumped the entire thing on the monster's head and nodded.

It disappeared, and a moment later, Amy's scream echoed throughout the house. It surprised Ellsworth, making him spill his coffee onto himself. She ran down the steps and out the door, being chased by a pink Morpheus in its worm-demon-thing form. Silver grinned and closed the door once she left. He hugged Shadow.

"That's better." Feeling neglected, Morpheus changed into its original form and joined in the hug.

"Aww, group hug." Ellsworth decided to give them a hug as well. He literally crushed the three as he picked them off their feet in a overwhelming embrace.

"D-Daddy…I can't," Silver gasped, still hanging onto Shadow. "…breathe…"

"Stop being a baby." He set them down. Shadow and Silver gasped for air. Pink Morpheus wagged his tail and mimicked the two. "You know," Ellsworth picked up his son's pet by its arm. "We should get that paint off."

"It's okay. I can do it." Silver was handed the demon. Its tail wagged. "Shadow can help, right?"

"Have you noticed that I didn't hardly say anything throughout that entire scene?"

"What do you mean? It's not like we were fighting over you. She came into my territory and tried to take control. I told her no, and she didn't listen. So, I showed her what happens when you don't listen to Silver." He crossed his arms and nodded. Ellsworth patted his son's head.

"That's my boy."

"R-Right." Shadow's ears flattened against his head. He took Morpheus by it collar and led it out in the back. Silver followed.

It was a few hours after lunch, so it was dark enough to allow Morpheus to go outside. The monster was interested in the garden until Silver brought over a hose. "Okay Morphy. Stand still." He turned it on and the water sprayed Shadow.

"Ahh!" Silver laughed loudly. Shadow had been knocked down and was soaking wet.

"Sorry! I have bad aim." The black hedgehog merely glared. The hose was turned on and, once again, Shadow was sprayed.

"Silver! Stop it!" Eventually, Shadow decided to take over the hose. Their playful actions suddenly turned into large water fight. There was one hose, and the two wrestled it out of each other's grasp. Morpheus felt left out, so it snatched the hose and sprayed the two.

Ellsworth was covered with water the moment he walked outside. "Daddy!" He seemed rather annoyed. Silver hid behind his fiancé, ears dropped. His father spit out a mouthful of water.

"You have a phone call." He shook the water off of his fur, covering the things around him with it. While Silver was inside, Ellsworth tossed a towel to Shadow. "I thought you were supposed to wash Morpheus, not each other."

"There was a slight change of plans."

* * *

In the morning, Amy's pestering continued. Silver was busying making breakfast while Morpheus made sure she didn't have any contact with its owner's fiancé. It wasn't much help, as the pink hedgehog tackled Shadow into a hug repeatedly.

"Amy, not now! I have a big fight today and I would like to look presentable."

Having had enough of the constant bickering and the annoying voice, Silver turned the stove off. He slammed down the pan, catching their attention. "I've had enough. After this competition is over you are leaving." He pointed to Amy, who seemed shocked at his words. "And, I do not expect you to come back."

"Look, Silver." She stood, crossing her arms. "Shadow and I were meant for each other." Here she goes with one of her 'we're perfect for each other' speeches. Silver has heard it over a hundred times, and it was beginning to really get to him.

Since it was hard to shut Amy up about anything, Silver grabbed a nearby bottle of syrup. He unscrewed the top and poured it on the pink hedgehog. She screamed, but he shoved the bottle in her mouth to silence her. Embarrassed, she ran out of the house. Shadow shook his head.

"Silver. That was horribly rude." Ellsworth sat across from Shadow at the table. "Now I won't have any syrup for my pancakes."

"Sorry Daddy."

* * *

Midnight Storm the Hedgedna - I shall allow you to kick Amy in the buttocks! I hearts you!

Pokelad - Indeed. Thanks for the review!

shadilverluvr - You can't kill Morphy! He's like...a black puddle. How you kill a black puddle? Thanks for reviewing. XD

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - Yes. Eventually they'll all be here. Eventually... Thanks for the review!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - I have no idea what that was about, but I liked it. Thanks for reviewing my wife x2!


	8. Epic Battle!

Still accepting fan characters for cameo appearances.

Man, I've been feeling really bad lately. Oh, I didn't proof read this chapter because I was lazy.

Midnight belongs to Midnight Storm the Hedgedna.

**NOTHERCHAPTEROFEPICPORPORTIONS**

A small crowd had already gathered by noon. They were seated in a half-circle in the valley where Shadow's training took place. Needless to say it brought back a lot of memories. Ellsworth was there, swinging his sword around and practicing. Scourge was also there, screaming at the top of his lungs. Sonic was trying to hug him, but the green hedgehog pushed him back with his foot. Silver was seated on a chair next to someone Shadow didn't recognize. He was wearing that pretty little kimono.

The female hedgehog sitting next to Silver looked similar to Amy. Her quills were styled the same way, except for her bangs. They were rather messy from what Shadow could tell. Her fur was black and had red stripes in various places on her quills and legs. She had a shade of purple above her eyes. Her eyes were bright green and shone with mischief.

"Shadow! There you are." Ellsworth placed a hand on his shoulder. The black hedgehog growled, ears back. "Take it easy. I just want to talk." There was a short pause. "Listen, I don't want to hurt you." He crossed his arms. "Well, if I do I'll never hear the end of it from Silver. So, let's make a deal." Shadow cocked an eyebrow. "I'll let you win this fight if you get my son out of the house every now and then. You know…turn him back into a boy, maybe?"

"What!?" Shadow huffed. "You're going to lose on purpose? I want a fair fight!"

"You're just saying that because it's impossible to change Silver."

"I doubt if Scourge or the Doctor could do it. I mean, your son is pretty messed up."

Ellsworth nodded, sighing. "You're right. A fair fight then?" He held out his hand to Shadow.

"That'll have to do." Shadow reached out to shake his fiancé's hand, but Ellsworth took his hand back, grinning. The ebony hedgehog stood there, partly angry, partly dumbfounded.

The female hedgehog beside Silver stood up, a megaphone in one hand and a microphone in the other. "Everyone shut up!" Her voice was loud and obnoxious. "We're here to see Elly and Shadow kill each other. So, shut up!"

Shadow passed Ellsworth's sword. He stopped for a moment, eyes widening. The damn thing was as big as him. He poked it and it sent an electrical surge throughout he arm. He yelped and backed away. He bumped into Silver, who hugged him.

"Good luck Shadie!"

"Haven't I ever told you not to call me that?" Silver pouted. Shadow stared. Ellsworth was right. One look and the pout will get you. "Alright. But, only after we're married."

The white hedgehog squealed and hugged his lover tightly. "I'll be cheering for you!"

"No pom-poms."

"Aww! But, I got them especially for-"

"_No pom-poms!_"

Silver let out a disappointed sigh. "Okay." He turned to Morpheus, who was still pink. "Here," He placed one of the blue pom-poms on its head. It appeared to be wearing a wig. A very sparkly, shiny wig. "So cute!"

Five minutes later, everyone was hushed so the self-proclaimed announcer could begin the battle. "Begin!" The black hedgehog, apparently named Midnight, shouted through the megaphone. The loud sound made some of the furries cringe in pain.

As soon as the battle began, Ellsworth charged forward, sword pointed at its target. Shadow grinned and snapped his fingers. The world around him was caught in the Chaos Control…Everything but Ellsworth. He yelped and barely dodged the heavy blade as it crashed into the earth. It left a rather big hole. Silver's father snapped his fingers, and the Chaos Control was canceled.

"Oh, poor thing. I forgot to tell you," He smirked. "I can use Chaos Control. Just like you."

"What!? But, you don't have a Chaos Emerald!"

"But I have a Chaos _Sword_." He pointed for emphasis. Shadow growled and charged forward. Ellsworth couldn't react fast enough and was hit in his abdomen.

"Kick his ass, Shadow!" Silver called from the side, jumping up with excitement. "But! Don't hurt him! He's still my Daddy! But… Do what you can to win! Just… Don't hurt him!"

"Silver!" Midnight glared at him. "Who's side are you on?"

"Y-Your's?"

"Awesome!"

Ellsworth's sword was knocked out of his hands. It landed a few feet away from Shadow. The blade suddenly lost its blue glow. The obsidian hedgehog ran over to it, thinking he could use it to defend himself and maybe counterattack. However, when he tried to pick up the sword, it felt as if it had become a part of the ground – He could budge it. Silver's father tackled him while he attempted to retrieve the Chaos Blade.

"Trying to steal my weapon?"

"Get off!" Shadow threw a punch at Ellsworth, but the large hedgehog did a back flip to avoid it. "Damnit! Hold still!"

"This would be a lot easier if you just agreed to our previous deal." Ellsworth picked up his sword. It began to glow blue again and appeared as light as a feather.

"Wha… How did you…?"

"Oh." Ellsworth laughed. "It's one of the sword's ancient abilities. It's an old legend."

Silver sat back down. "Why did they stop?"

Midnight shouted through her megaphone. "Stop talking and kill each other!"

Ignoring them, Ellsworth went on. "The sword only works for you when it recognizes your spirit as someone who is trustworthy of such a power." He grinned. "Not many people have the strength to wield it."

"Is that so? How did you learn, then?"

"Learn?" Ellsworth threw his head back and laughed. "It was my unique skills and intelligence and allowed me to – Hey!"

Shadow dashed forward using his shoes. He tackled Ellsworth and snatched the sword. When it lost its blue glow, the thing became heavier than the ARK. He dropped it. Silver's father laughed while he attempted to pick up the blade.

"Keep trying. You'll never be able to…"

Ellsworth's voice trailed off. The Chaos Blade began to glow red. Shadow lifted it with a bit of trouble, but it became easier the more he tried. Once he realized what he was actually doing, he paused and glanced at the other hedgehog. The two were both shocked.

"Ha! In your face!" Shadow swung the sword around. "I can use the sword! Do you know what that means?"

"I'm going to admit defeated and you're going to give it back?"

"It means that you're boned, old man!" Scourge was standing on his seat, routing for Shadow. Unfortunately, he was knocked off by Sonic, who tackled him in a hug. "Get off of me! I don't like you!" He pushed the blue hedgehog away and ran off. But, it was a seriously stupid idea – No one can outrun Sonic. Especially when he's after something he _really_ wants.

While Shadow was distracted, Ellsworth snatched his sword back. "H-Hey! That was mine!"

"C'mon Shadow! Kick his ass! He's nothing but an old hag that can't run worth shit!" Ellsworth looked over at Midnight. She shoved the megaphone in Silver's hands and pointed to him. "He said it!"

The black hedgehog used Chaos Control to teleport behind Silver's father. Ellsworth knew, and countered with an aerial attack. Shadow dodged quickly, but was kicked in the face before he could land. "Ow!" He held onto his nose.

For about an hour or so, the battle continued in the manner of Shadow getting his ass kicked. Whenever he jumped, Ellsworth would quickly knock him back down with a swing of his sword. Whenever he attacked, Ellsworth would dodge and counter by attacking from behind. And, whenever Shadow tried to block or dodge any of the other hedgehog's attacks, Ellsworth would attack by swinging his sword down and knocking the poor thing back. It's just like that battle with Genshin from Ninja Gaiden Two…I FUCKING HATE HIM. I spent, like, two hours trying to beat him! He was so annoying and I just about ripped the 360 from the wall! But, I calmed down and kicked his ass. So, it's all good.

Unfortunately, Shadow's outcome wasn't the same as the Lotus'. Ellsworth was beginning to get bored, and decided it was best to finish the battle. He plunged his sword into the dirt. A blue circle glowed under Shadow's feet. And, the next thing he knew, he was high in the air, vulnerable for attack. It was the perfect opportunity. Silver's father jumped into the air, attacking with the hilt of the sword rather than the blade.

A minute later, the black hedgehog was in the ground, unconscious. Silver wailed and covered his eyes, unable to watch his fiancé lose. Midnight had a big smile on her face. Scourge was still screaming and trying to get Sonic off.

"And Elly is the winner!" Midnight shouted through her megaphone.

"Haha! You owe me twenty bucks!" Silver pointed to Tails, who appeared dumbfounded.

"B-But…Shadow is the Ultimate Lifeform! How could he lose?"

Midnight shook her head, patting the fox. "I like you Tails, so don't take this in an offensive way." She held the megaphone up to her mouth. Silver squealed and covered his ears. "This is the future, stupid!"

Ellsworth went over to check up on Shadow. Silver ran over to them. "Daddy! You didn't hurt him, did you?"

"Of course not. At least…I didn't intend to."

"Daddy! I'll never love you if you hurt my fiancé!"

"He's _my_ fiancé!" It was Amy. She had finally gotten all of the remaining syrup off her quills. Midnight's ears shot upright. "You cheated!" She pointed to Ellsworth. "No one can beat Shadow! It's impossible!"

"How's this for impossible, bitch?" Midnight snapped her fingers and did something to make Amy burst into silver flames. She laughed maniacally as the pink hedgehog ran around, failing her arms.

Silver picked up his lover, bent on carrying him back home. He was stopped when Amy ran in front of him. "Midnight! How dare you! I was almost set on fire!"

"Deal with it, Silver!"

"Morpheus! Put Amy out!" It did as its master told, warping itself around Amy to put the fire out. She screamed. Well, you would too if a black, shape shifting puddle was on you.

* * *

MysticMelodyz - Ah, yes. Me too. I never really liked her. Thanks for the review!

Midnight Storm the Hedgedna - Done! Thanks for the review!

Pokelad - Indeed she did. Thanks for reviewing. XD

shadilverluvr - Vulgra isn't my character, so you might need permission to do that. XD Thanks for the review.

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - Silver does know how to deal with them. Thanks for reviewing!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Ew. I don't like Shadamy. Morphy? I think I mention it before. He's an exact copy of Dark Sonic. Or Dark Super Sonic...or whatever it's called when he gets super-omega-epically pissed off. OMFG. I have never seen Scourgey and Manic as a couple. Go for it! Thanks for the long review, and good luck with your comics!

Laughter in the Dark - Yeah, I think that was like...the only funny part. Thanks for the review!


	9. LOLWUT?

Still accepting fan characters for cameo appearances.

WHOO! Um...yeah.

**I'veGotAJarofDirt!**

Shadow eased open his eyes and groaned. He felt a damp washcloth being placed on his forehead. Once his vision cleared, he met the loving gaze of his fiancé. He smiled softly, reaching up and stroking the side of Silver's face. His lover giggled.

"I see you're feeling better." Silver removed the washcloth and helped the injured hedgehog sit upright.

"Damn," He hissed in pain. "My back." The white hedgehog pouted.

"Poor thing." Shadow's ears perked up. "Daddy must've hurt you so much." He weaved his hand through his lover's quills, earning a soft purr. "Silver's going to take care of you until you're better." He smiled. "If you need anything just ask."

Silver picked up the nearby bowel of water and walked through a doorway with a cloth covering it. The room he was in was terribly small. There was only enough space for a bed, a nightstand, and a window. His peace was rudely interrupted by Scourge's big entrance.

"Good morning loser!" Shadow's ears flattened against his head. "How's it feel to lose the very thing you've held so close for the past four years?"

"Knock it off, Scourge."

"So. Now that you've lost your chance at marrying Silver," He paused, grinning to himself. "Are you going back home? Take Sonic with you! Please!"

"Scourge! Shut up!" Shadow narrowed his eyes, fists clenched.

"Aw, but poor Silver. He has no spouse now. I wonder what he'll do? Maybe…" His voice trailed off and he leaned toward his friend. "Maybe he'll go back to Mephiles?"

"Shut the fuck up!" Shadow's fur began to glow red. Scourge stumbled backward, laughing.

"Whoa! Calm down. Geez, I was just kidding." The ebony hedgehog sighed, trying to calm himself. "You really have some anger issues to work out."

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" Shadow shouted, still glowing red. Scourge held his hands up in defense and stepped out of the room. Silver's voice could be heard soon after. He was yelling at the green hedgehog for bothering his fiancé.

"Shadow! I'm so sorry! I told Scourge to stay out of here." He placed a cup of hot tea on the stand next to the bed. "I have to get back to my chores," He handed his lover some sort of red button. "If you need me for anything, just push it."

The obsidian hedgehog sighed happily and leaned his head against the pillow behind him. He peace was disturbed, yet again, by Scourge. "Stripes! You have to see this!" He dashed out of the room and returned with a computer. "It's unbelievable! See, I hacked Silver's e-mail account, like five seconds ago because I was bored."

Shadow pushed the button his fiancé had given him. "Scourge, go away." He pushed it again.

"No, dude! You really have to see this!" Scourge pointed to the screen.

"Scourge…" Shadow gritted his teeth, repeatedly pressing the button.

"Dude! C'mon. For once in your life, listen to me!" He pointed again, shoving the thing in Shadow's face.

Still pushing the red button, he skimmed over the words. His button pressing soon slowed to a stop as he continued to read. "This is Silver's account? Are you sure?"

"…No." He dropped the computer on Shadow's lap. He placed a finger on his chin. "You know what? I suddenly have an urge to build a fire-proof ship and take a long voyage across the ocean of lava." Scourge patted the black hedgehog on his head. "I'll be back in twenty minutes."

"Scourgey!" Silver kicked his shin.

"Ow! Silver, what the fuck!?" He was pushed out of the room.

"I told you to stay away from him! Outoutout!" Silver snatched the computer before Shadow could finish reading what was on the screen. "I should take him up to the Mountain to learn some manners." He took the computer out of the room and returned with a smile. "What did you need?"

Shadow paused for a moment, thinking. He wasn't as injured as his fiancé thought. And, since his every need was tended to, he decided to have a little fun before Scourge ruined it again. "I want a bubble bath."

"W-What?" Silver didn't seem too happy.

"I want you to give me a bubble bath." He grinned.

Silver sighed. "Alright, Shadie. Just this once." He helped his lover out of bed and into the kitchen. Ellsworth was there, reading some sort of manual.

"Scourge," He shouted over his shoulder out the window behind him. "You need a sail too."

"Is that what the book says?" His voice was faint, but Shadow knew it was Scourge's.

"Yup."

Shadow slammed his hands on the table and snatched the book Ellsworth was reading. "Why are you helping him!?"

"Scourge is doing me a favor." He said, taking the book back gently. "He's after something that might help us, and you."

"Look, Ellsworth. I've known Scourge for quite a long time. He's not really the type of person that helps others." Silver returned with a bathrobe.

"I beg to differ." Ellsworth cocked an eyebrow at his son. He shook his head. "Scourge has changed ever since he became Silver's brother."

"Daddy! Shadow doesn't know yet…" The white hedgehog bit his bottom lip as his fiancé gave him a weird look. "Um… Your bath is ready."

* * *

Shadow forgot how relaxing baths were. What made it more enjoyable was the fact that Silver was there, _and_ the door was locked. This made him very happy. "So," He paused, leaning against his lover's arm. "You're related to Scourge?"

"No. Daddy adopted him." Whew. That was a relief. "After Scourgey completed his training, Daddy really started to like him. He's become a little nicer since then." Silver smiled. "I'm glad he has a family now."

"What's wrong with not having a family? I don't have one and I turned out fine."

"Shadow," Silver ran his fingers through his fiancé's quills. "You're not a sick, sadistic freak."

"You should see me when I'm mad."

Silver giggled. "Everyone is scary when they're mad. Especially Daddy." He rubbed the water into Shadow's fur.

"Silver…about yesterday," He paused, the memories suddenly rushing back to him. "I'm sorry."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm sorry for losing." Silver nuzzled Shadow, purring.

"You didn't lose, silly."

"Eh?"

"Daddy noticed something yesterday. Maybe you should talk to him." Silver winked. The ebony hedgehog assumed he already knew what Ellsworth had in mind. "Anyway, I'll leave you alone now." He attempted to stand, but Shadow pulled him into a quick kiss.

"You know, this water does feel wonderful…but, it's missing one thing." He pulled Silver closer to him. "You."

* * *

Ellsworth looked up when the two walked into the kitchen. "I thought Shadow was taking a bath. Why are you wet?"

Silver was drying his quills. "Um..."

"Did he splash you?"

"…Sure?" He looked at Shadow and nodded toward his father. "Just talk to him. Don't get mad – Daddy doesn't gloat like Scourgey." He smiled at Ellsworth and made his way up the steps.

Shadow sat down at the table, across from his fiancé's father. "Ellsworth?" The large hedgehog looked up. "About yesterday…"

"I wondered when you would ask me about that." He chuckled. "I want to apologize. I didn't mean to whack you around that much."

He was becoming annoyed with Ellsworth's I'm-Stronger-Than-You-LOL attitude. "Right. I was just having an off day. I could've easily beaten you."

Ellsworth snickered. "Of course, Shadow."

He growled. "Just because you can Chaos Control doesn't mean you're all-powerful."

"It's not just the powers I have. It's the training. You're from the past, so anyone can beat you because you haven't had the proper training." Shadow stood, fur glowing red. "Calm down! I'm not done yet." He paused until the black hedgehog sat back down. "I am willing to train you if you are willing to listen to me."

"I don't see how this is going to help my situation with Silver." He looked down at his hands on the table. This training wouldn't mean anything to him if he couldn't marry that adoring white hedgehog.

"If I teach you, that makes you my apprentice." Shadow was still upset. Ellsworth tried to make eye contact with him. "If you're my apprentice, then, by tradition, my offspring has to marry you to continue the bloodline."

Shadow immediately became interested. "You mean…if I am willing to learn from you…I can marry Silver?"

Ellsworth grinned, nodding. "I want to give you something to congratulate you." He stood, mentioning for Shadow to follow him outside. They walked over to a Japanese styled altar in the backyard.

"What's this for?" The obsidian hedgehog watched as Ellsworth pulled a fancy-looking spear from behind the altar.

"Ta-Da." He handed it to Shadow. "This is yours now." It glowed red as soon as he touched it. "It works similar to my Chaos Blade, except it's weaker, so be careful."

"How do I use it?" He tried to twirl it around, but the spear slipped out of his hand and plunged itself into the ground.

"You'll find out eventually." Ellsworth nodded and returned to the house. Yeah, some teacher.

"Shadow! We have a problem." Silver, wearing a towel on his head, grabbed his fiancé's arm and dragged him to another part of the yard. A large pirate ship was there. Scourge was on it, dancing around and singing 'adventure'. "He wants us to go with him."

Well, why not? It wasn't like staying here with Ellsworth would be more fun.

* * *

Holy hell. I had a LOT of reviews. Thanks everyone!

shadilverluvr - Who doesn't want to beat the crap out of Amy? Thanks for reviewing!

Pokelad - Indeed. Amy never learns her lesson. Thanks for the review.

Midnight Storm the Hedgedna - YOU MADE ME...thank you for reviewing? DX

MysticMelodyz - Shadow will always be okay. I mean, it's SHADOW. I just hope Amy isn't okay. Thanks for the review! XD

My.life.as.a.caricature - DAW! You make the Lotus feel special! So much so that she has to talk int third person. She would also die without a computer near her at all times. Thank you for the lovely review!

Lise-chan - Shadow shall never be beat! Thanks for reviewing! XD

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Oh noes! Maybe Elly can redeem himself and make you not hate him as much? Thanks for the review, even though it was short!

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - I would give you an answer, but it's already been answered. Thanks for the review!

Laughter in the Dark - I want a pink dress for my Shadow plushie! I bet he would look cute. Anyway, thanks for reviewing! XD


	10. Adventure!

Still accepting fan characters for cameo appearances.

Ugh. Sorry everyone. I still don't feel good. I probably won't be updating for a while. It's hard to write when you have the urge to vomit all the time.

Spenser belongs to The Lotus Black

**THE MARVELOUS MISADVENTURES OF SHADOW AND CO.**

"Scourge! What the hell?" Shadow noticed a ladder nearby. He turned to Silver, who shrugged. He climbed up to the ship by himself, seeing as how his fiancé went back inside to finish drying his quills. "Scourge?" Instead of the familiar green hedgehog, he met a yellow…hedgehog…porcupine? He couldn't tell the difference.

"Hello there. Are you the TV repair man?" Whatever he was, his quills were styled similar to Sonic's, giving him the appearance of a hedgehog. He had bangs hanging down, the ends dyed with dark colors. He was wearing Scourge's jacket. "I want my TV fixed."

Shadow was a little freaked out, but he decided to play along regardless. "Um, I can try."

"Kay! BRB." He twirled around and dashed off down the steps. He returned with a toaster. "Here! For some reason, whenever I try to change the channel, bread pops out!"

"…That's not a television."

The yellow…thing pointed an accusing finger at Shadow. "LIAH!" He hugged the toaster close to himself and hissed, ears bent back. "My bread!"

Shadow stepped back, scared. "Spenser!" Scourge tackled the yellow hedgehog and snatched his jacket back. "I told you never to touch my stuff!" He stood, fixing the collar as he brushed off any unseen dirt.

"Sir! I put the white thing on the pole, sir!" Spenser saluted.

"Good boy. Now go and…do that thing that you do every day." Scourge sighed with relief as Spenser jumped down from the ship. "Stripes! Are you coming with us?"

Now that the crazed yellow hedgehog had left, Shadow was able to look around. The deck was large and sturdy…that's what she said. Uh, and piles of rope sat near the mast. He was about to make his way downstairs, but was stopped by Scourge. "What do you plan on doing with this thing?"

"We're going over the lava ocean, duh." He led the ebony hedgehog into a room on the other end of the ship. On the table was a map. Shadow glanced over Scourge's shoulder as he spoke. "See, we're here. And, I want to go here." He pointed to an island south of where they were. "It's rumored that Mephiles lives there."

"You're going to visit Mephiles? Why?"

"Visit?" Scourge snorted, laughing. "He hates me. I'm going there to steal the Scepter of Darkness."

Shadow sighed. "Again? What do you need it for?"

"The sky." Shadow cocked an eyebrow. "Look, Silver's birthday is coming up and I wanted to do something unexpected for him. You know how he loved the sky in our world? How it was blue and everything?"

"You're going to clear the sky?"

Scourge nodded. "That and we'll need it if Mephiles decides to attack again."

"Planning ahead, are we?"

"Quite. Speaking of which, what are you getting Silver for his birthday?"

Shadow hadn't really thought about that. He didn't have any money or any tools to make anything. "I don't know. I'll just fuck his brains out or something."

The green hedgehog cocked an eyebrow. He never expected to hear something so vulgar, especially since it wasn't coming out of him. "Alrighty…you do that." There was a short pause. Scourge really didn't know what to say, so he decided to change the subject. "Are you coming with us?"

"Nah. Silver and I are going to –"

Before he could finish his sentence, his fiancé levitated himself up to the deck. A striped bandana was wrapped around his head, giving him a pirate-like appearance. He wore a matching red and white striped shirt. Shadow's attention was drawn to his lover's shorts. He had light blue shorts on. They were short. Very short. It was a big turn-on.

"Ta-Da! I have my own pirate outfit!" Shadow continued to stare, mouth hanging open. "What do you think, Shadie?" He posed. Unfortunately, his fiancé was too distracted by his outfit to hear or formulate a response. "Shadow?" Silver waved a hand in front of his face.

Scourge stood there, wondering why things like this always happen in front of him. "Silver, why do you wear clothes? There's nothing to show."

"To get Shadow's attention." He hugged his lover, but it had no affect. "I don't think it's working."

Shadow finally reacted. He grabbed Silver's arm. "You. Me. Bed. Now."

"Stripes! No! Not now." Scourge shook his head. "Let me at least show you two your room first."

"Kay!" Silver began to follow the green hedgehog, and as he did, Shadow spanked him. "Hey!" Hey whirled around and glared at his fiancé. "What the hell was that for?" He received a wink.

The two followed Scourge downstairs and to where the rooms were. "Here." He pushed one of the doors open. Inside was a desk and a bed covered with red sheets. "So, now you two can –"

He was cut off when Shadow pushed him out of his way. "That's nice. I'll talk to you later." He pulled Silver in with a squeal. "If you value your life you will not enter this room until nightfall." He slammed the door, leaving Scourge there dumbfounded…again.

He returned to the deck and noticed Spenser had become tangled in a pile of rope. "Hi boss! Um, I tried to do that thing that I do everyday all the time, but I got stuck in this brown snake." Scourge pulled the rope off and glared at the yellow hedgehog-like-thing.

"Look here, hedgehog."

Spenser laughed loudly. "Hedgehog? I'm a porcupine!" He snorted.

"Whatever. Go make me something to eat." The yellow porcupine saluted and bolted down the steps. He tripped over loose rope at first, but scrambled to his feet, dashing into the kitchen.

* * *

Shadow had taken this time alone to give Silver an early 'birthday present'. He placed his hands at his lover's waist, growling with desire. He kissed the white hedgehog, hungering for more.

Silver moaned into his lover's mouth. He was pushed back into the bed. Without breaking their kiss, he sat on the edge of the bed, pulling Shadow down on top of him. The obsidian hedgehog finally pulled back, looking down at his fiancé with a lustful glint in his eyes.

"I've never had sex on a ship before." Silver stretched his arms over his head.

"I'm always willing to try something new." He coyly licked the side of his lover's check. "I'll take care of everything, just relax." Shadow pinned Silver's arms onto the bed. He rubbed himself against his fiancé's hips.

"Ahh, Shadow…" The white hedgehog arched his back, pressing himself closer. Shadow slid his hands down to the inside of his fiancé's thigh. "Oh, you're such a pervert."

"You like it that way, don't you?" He began to stroke between Silver's legs, earning breathless moans. "Shh…just relax."

Five minutes later, as Scourge was passing the door that led to his friend's room, he overheard strange noises. "Shadow…" It was Silver's voice. He sounded breathless and dazed. "Oh, I've been such a bad boy." Wait, what? The green hedgehog's ears perked up. "Punish me! Punish me! Ahh!" Wow, it sounds like they're having fun. Shadow would be _really_ angry if someone interrupted them.

He sat down at the table in the kitchen. Spenser was there, boiling water and trying to find an apron that matched his fur color. Scourge grinned, a devious plot coming to mind. "Hey, Spenser!" The porcupine looked up. "Want to make thirty bucks?"

* * *

Thanks for all the awesome reviews, guys! Sorry, but I don't feel up to replying. Maybe next time. DX


	11. Filler Chapter!

Still accepting fan characters for short cameo appearances.

Oh gosh, how long has it been? Sorry for not updating in a while, everyone. I know this chapter is _really_ short, but it's a filler chapter. And, it's all that I could muster up in an hour's time. INSERT UNHAPPY FACE HERE

**The Marvelous Misadventures of Shadow and Co. Part 2**

"Ahh!" Spenser ran onto the deck screaming and failing his arms. Silver followed him, the Chaos Spear in his hands. "Rape!" He ran over to the railing, bent on jumping onto the solid ground. However, when he looked down, he saw nothing but lava. "Wait!" The white hedgehog skidded to a stop. "Who started the ship?" There was a short pause. "Wait… How did we even get near the ocean? We were a mile away." He looked at the other furry, who shrugged.

"Spenser, I don't know. Just give me back my shorts." Silver held out his hand.

"Nevah!" Spenser, being the strange porcupine he was, shoved the hedgehog's shorts in his mouth, eating them. "I want my thirty bucks now!"

Silver watched in amazement and disgust. "Did you just…eat my shorts?" Spenser nodded. "Scourgey! You're dead when I get to you!" He stomped back down the steps and passed Shadow, who was still half dazed in their room. "Shadie? Are you okay?" He sat beside his fiancé.

"I'm fine," He was holding his head. "I'm just a little tired." He was hugged. "Not now, Silver."

"Aww," Silver placed the back of his hand on his lover's forehead. "Maybe you should lay down for a little nap. Kay, sweetie?" He stood and gently pushed Shadow back down on the bed. He covered him with a blanket. "I'll be back in an hour." He shut the door and headed toward the kitchen. "Scourge!"

The green hedgehog jumped, spilling his coffee. "What!?" He turned to Silver. His ears immediately drooped. "Wha-Where did you get that bazooka?"

Silver's eyes reflected anger. "Spenser. Ate. My. Shorts. Those were my only pair."

Scourge shrugged, smiling to maintain his innocence. "You'll get them back in four to six hours." Silver's bottom eyelid twitched. "I-I can give Spenser some sort of drink mix so you can get them back sooner."

"That's so gross!" He pointed the gun at Scourge. A red dot appeared on his forehead. "Buy me a new pair! Buy me a new pair! Now!" He pressed his finger to the trigger.

"Alright! Alright! I will!" Scourge held up his hands in defense. "I'll buy you a new pair as soon as the boat reaches our destination!"

"Stop shouting, Shadow is trying to take a nap!"

"Stop yelling at me!" Annoyed, Silver pulled the trigger on the bazooka. Shadow burst into the room.

"Silver! Are you okay?" Immediately, the white hedgehog shoved the weapon in a burnt Scourge's arms. He pouted and started crying. "Silver! What happened?" He pulled his fiancé into a hug.

Silver wailed and buried his face in the obsidian hedgehog's chest. "Shadie! Scourge tried to kill me!" He sniffed. "I just wanted my clothes back!"

"What!?" Scourge shook the debris off his head. "Stripes! That's a damn lie! Are you seriously going to believe that!?" He placed the bazooka on the table. "That little, white fluff ball is pure evil!" He pointed for emphasis. "Evil!"

"Scourgey! I'm supposed to be your little brother! How could you say something like that?" He started sobbing again, rubbing his face against the tuft of fur on Shadow's chest.

"Seriously Stripes!?"

Shadow pulled his fiancé closer and glared at the green hedgehog. "Scourge. Wait for me up on the deck."

"But-"

"Now." With his ears against his head, Scourge exited the kitchen. "Are you alright, Silver?" He tilted his lover's head up and wiped away the remaining tears. "Everything is fine now."

"Thank you Shadie! I feel better now." He smiled brightly and hugged Shadow. "But, shouldn't you be taking that nap?"

He chuckled and patted Silver's head. "I will after I have that talk with Scourge."

"Go easy on him." Shadow nodded and left the kitchen. Silver scooped up the bazooka and giggled. "I always get what I want." He glared and pointed a finger to the audience. "You better remember that."

* * *

"Hey boss." Spenser pointed to a floating island. "There's a random hospital in the middle of nowhere!" He placed a finger on his head in a thoughtful manner. "It makes you wonder how they get back and forth from home and work."

"Spenser. I told you to mess with them in a way that wouldn't get me in trouble." Scourge crossed his arms.

"D-Does this mean I'm not getting my thirty bucks?"

"Scourge!" Shadow stormed up the steps and took hold of the green hedgehog's throat. He squeezed. "I told you not to bother us!"

"Ack! Stripes, it was just a joke!" He struggled to get out of the ebony hedgehog's grasp. "Let go! You're…crushing my windpipe!" He tried to breathe, but Shadow tightened his grip. "Ah… That…hurts."

Scourge was released when the other hedgehog was tackled by Morpheus. He scrambled to his feet and pushed the monster off. Shadow growled in anger until he noticed Silver shaking his head. "Shadow! Be nice to my brother."

"Y-Yeah." Scourge coughed. "Kill me and Ellsworth will beat you up again." Shadow growled, causing the green hedgehog to hold his hands up in defense. "Hey! Calm down, I was kidding. Learn to take a joke." He stood and brushed invisible dirt off his jacket. "Spenser! You know which way we're going, right?"

Annoyed, Shadow walked away to the other end of the boat. He rested his arms on the railing and looked out at the ocean of lava. Silver had followed him. "Aww, don't be mad. That's just how Scourgey is sometimes. You'll get used to it, trust me."

"I've known him longer than you. He's _always_ like that." He sighed.

Silver leaned his back against the railing, watching the yellow porcupine attempt to steer the boat. "I'll tell him to be nicer then. Or else." Shadow didn't respond. "Okay Shadie?" There was still no answer. The white hedgehog tilted his fiancé's head toward him and noticed his face was tinted a light green color. "Zombie!"

"Where!?" Spenser whirled around and caught sight of Silver running away. "Gasp!" He thrust a finger in the air. "To the hospital!" He spun the wheel around, sharply turning the boat and almost throwing Scourge off the side of the railing.

* * *

SilverHeartsInTheNight34 - Lawl. It's all good, I know everyone has things to do. Thanks for the review! And, the use of your character! XD

Pokelad - Yeah, Spenser doesn't do well when it comes to mental work. Thanks for reviewing!

MysticMelodyz - Isn't he always up to something? XD Thanks for the review!

My.life.as.a.caricature - Aww, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it! The perverted parts are common in some of my more humorous stuff...I think. Anyway, thanks for reviewing!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - OMGYOUGOTAWII! I've been wanting one for like, a year. My mom won't let me because I have too many game stations or something like that. I'm glad you liked the chapter, though. And I miss your uber long reviews. Thanks for the semi-short review! I loved it.

Midnight Storm the Hedgedna - Indeed. Scourge is a very bad hedgie. Thanks for reviewing!

Kamala11 - Yes! I've been wanting to draw Pirate!Silver too. But, my drawing skills aren't that good. Maybe one day someone will. Anywho, thanks for the review!

shadilverluvr - I don't really know how Spenser can fit in Sky's past, cause he was...like, not born on Mobius or where ever Silver lives. XD Thanks for reviewing!

Silabus' Taco - Huzzah! I'm gayly loved! I shall continue to write for you! Thank you for the review!


	12. The Stain of Doom

Still accepting fan characters for short cameo appearances.

OMG. This chapter is seriously retarded. There are two storylines for right now. They'll come together eventually.

Orchid belongs to ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m.  
Tihocan belongs to The Lotus Black. His appearance isn't described in this chapter. You can see what he looks like in a horrible drawing I posted on my profile.

**The Marvelous Misadventures of Shadow and Co. Part 3**

"Ah, no kids. No Spenser. Just peace and quiet." Ellsworth sighed and sat back in a lawn chair he set up outside in the garden. With Silver gone he was finally able to get some rest. It wasn't like he did much anyway, but taking care of such a restless family isn't an easy job – It's nice to get a break once and a while. He closed his eyes and thought back to the days when he actually enjoyed being a parent.

Silver would constantly throw things about with his telekinetic abilities once his powers developed after his first birthday. He targeted Ellsworth's head whenever Mom was out. But, when he picked up the young hedgehog to scold him, he would be hugged and that famous pout showed on the child's face. It was near impossible to discipline him.

"_You'll never be a good father if you just let him do whatever he wants. Grow some guts, Ellsworth!"_ He sighed again. For some reason, Mom always knew how to handle little Silver. Whenever he had a problem while growing up, she knew what to do. She was also the one that convinced Ellsworth to train himself to wield the Chaos Blade. Without her harsh words, he would never be the person he is today.

Ellsworth came from a famous family. His father was a wizard, a magician. Their family was known for using real magic to maintain peace in their town. He grew up with eight siblings: six brothers and two sisters. Everyone in the family had magical abilities except for him. He and his mother were the only two people that had no connection to the magical world. He was teased growing up, but, like Silver's mother, his own mother always knew what to do.

A loud crash snapped him out of his thoughts. He jumped up and whirled around. Smoke was rising from the other side of the village. He dashed to the altar around the corner, snatched his sword, and took along a mysterious-looking shuriken. He was out of breath when he reached his destination. Mephiles was attacking. He was holding what appeared to be a small child and was yelling at everyone to get out of his way. Ellsworth tightened his grip on the shuriken.

"Ellsworth. It's a fine day, isn't it?" He placed the child down and floated into the air. "I'm not in the mood for a fight. I already have what I want."

The white hedgehog ran over to the child, checking its pulse. He looked up at Mephiles, who was making his escape. "No you don't." He stepped back and flung the shuriken at the floating demon. One of the blades buried itself in his back. Ellsworth pulled his hand back, and like a yo-yo, the shuriken immediately came back, bringing Mephiles with it. "What did you take?" He pointed his sword at the monster's neck. "Give it back."

Mephiles snapped his fingers. A roared gently shook the ground. Iblis in its strange, worm-like form appeared at the edge of a nearby cliff. While Ellsworth was distracted by it, Mephiles removed the shuriken and made his leave. "Have fun."

The young child, who appeared to be a hedgehog, sat up and rubbed his head. "Daddy?" He looked around, surprised. "W-Where am I?" Iblis roared again, catching his attention. He looked over his shoulder and screamed. "What is that!?" Before the monster could strike him, Ellsworth stepped in front of him, blocking the attack with his sword. "Who are you!?"

"Get out of the way!" Doing as he was told, the hedgehog scrambled to his feet and hid behind a large rock. Ellsworth used the shuriken again, cutting Iblis in half and forcing it to return to the lava. He sighed once it was gone. "Mephiles really pisses me off." He turned around, wondering where the child went. "Hey, you can come out now."

"That was awesome!" The hedgehog ran from behind the rock. "You were like," He mimicked the larger creature until he tripped over himself and fell down. Ellsworth laughed.

"Those moves are for professionals only." He helped the child up. "What's your name?" He looked around. "And, where are your parents?"

He threw his hands in the air. "I'm Tihocan!" He twirled around, enjoying where he was. "My Daddy should be here any minute now to pick me up! He was really mad at Mephiles! You should've seen his face! It was like this:" He made a strange face that looked like he was constipated. Ellsworth laughed again.

"You're a very silly hedgehog." He patted Tihocan on his head. "Why don't we go wait for your father at my house? I can get you something to drink there."

"Yay! Juice!" He suddenly jumped on Ellsworth's back and held onto his upright fringes. "Onward!"

He began to make his way back home. "You know, you remind me a lot of my own son when he was about your age."

"Really? Did he like juice too?"

"Yes. Certain kinds of juice. He was very picky about what he ate."

"I'm not picky! I'll eat anything! Daddy says we should trust our cook more!"

Ellsworth sounded surprised. "You have your own cook? Wow, what does your father do?"

Tihocan threw his hands up in the air again, almost falling off the hedgehog's back. "Daddy rules the world! But, he says it's not like a gentleman to say it like that."

"He rules the world?" He laughed yet again, thinking the young hedgehog was just misinterpreting his father's occupation. "That sounds like a hard job."

Tihocan didn't seem to hear him. He was rocking himself back and forth, repeating 'juice' in a singing voice.

* * *

"It's okay Shadow. Don't be scared. We'll be right outside the door okay?" Silver placed a hand on his sick fiancé's head. "Poor thing. Just scream if you need me." He nodded to the doctor and walked out into the waiting room. Most of the chairs were taken. Scourge was on the other side of the room, flirting with one of the nurses. Spenser was devouring most of the food on the cart they had brought out for everyone. He sat down beside a purple hedgehog with blue bangs. She was sipping on some sort of drink. "Hi." He smiled at her.

"Uh, hi." She returned the smile. She wore glasses and her eyes were a dark shade of pink. She had a grey, sleeveless hoodie, pink pants, and pink shoes that seemed to match her eyes.

"So, what are you doing here?"

"Well, I came here for the smoothies, but the hospital kinda floated away from the rest of the city. So, we're all stuck here." Well, that explains why the waiting room is filled with people.

"This hospital has smoothies?" Suddenly, Silver wasn't as interested in the well being of his future husband. The female hedgehog nodded. "Where?"

"Follow me." She stood and made her way out of the waiting room. Silver followed, making eye contact with Scourge as he passed. "By the way, my name's Orchid."

"Silver." He was busy peeking in random rooms that they passed. "This is a big hospital."

"Yeah, well, they expanded it awhile back when we realized we weren't able to get off this island." She stopped and pointed to a counter in a food-court-styled room. "There are the smoothies." She smiled at him. "I'll grab us a table."

"Um… I think I'll take a nectarine smoothie." The man behind the counter didn't seem very thrilled.

"That'll be 4.89."

Silver gave him a horrified look. "Five dollars for a smoothie!?" He pouted. "Oh, please Mr. Smoothie-Man… Can't you lower the price for little ole me?" His bottom lip quivered.

"Nice try."

"B-But," Tears began to fill his eyes. "I'm really thirsty."

He pointed to the restrooms. "There's a water fountain over there."

Fed up, Silver growled, fists clenched. "Listen here, either you give me a reasonably priced smoothie, or I'll tell my Daddy that you mistreated me."

"So? It's not like your father is Ellsworth or…" His voice trailed off. He walked over to the machine and came back with a smoothie. "Here you are! No charge! Enjoy!" He attempted to smile.

"Aww! You're so sweet Mr. Smoothie-Man!" He walked over to where Orchid was.

"How do you do that?"

"Unless you're Daddy's Little Angel, I can't help you." She laughed, but it faded once she realized he wasn't joking.

"So, you're father is Ellsworth? He's a monster." Silver giggled. She cocked an eyebrow at his response.

"No, Daddy's really easy to manipulate. The Chaos Blade just makes him seem like that."

"Let's not talk about your father's weaknesses in a public place." Silver nodded, agreeing. They sipped on their smoothies in silence until a loud crash caused them to panic. The white hedgehog accidentally spilled the drink onto his fur. He jumped up, screaming. Orchid tried to wipe off the stain with a napkin. "I'm going to find out what happened."

Silver had a horrified look on his face. Spenser ran over to him with a mouthful of cookies and a handful of cranberry juice. "Silver! Mephiles is…" He paused and tried to make eye contact with the hedgehog. "Hello?" He noticed the stain and stepped back. "Oh…I, uh…" He threw his hands up in the air, dropping the cartons of juice. He ran off screaming. "Run for your lives!"

Back in the main part of the hospital, Shadow was just beginning to stir. He held his head and sat up. "Ugh," His vision was still blurry, but he could make out the form of a hedgehog. "Silver?" He was fully awakened when Spenser began to violently shake him.

"Someone got Silver dirty! We're all gonna die!" He ran around the room in a panicked frenzy. "He's going to kill us!" He skidded to a stop and picked up a bowel of mashed potatoes that was placed there for Shadow when he awoke. "Yummers." He stuck a spoonful in his mouth and stared at the confused hedgehog in bed.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I like potatoes." He discarded the spoon and shoved his face into the bowel. Shadow stood and slowly snuck out of the room. He met up with Scourge, who was just as confused as him.

"Yo, Stripes. What'd you do?"

Shadow crossed his arms. "What makes you think I have something to do with this?"

"Cause I don't have a reason to blow up a building filled with pretty women and old people. I'm not like that." He grinned. Orchid ran over to the two. Scourge was a little surprised at her sudden appearance and speed.

She pointed to the black hedgehog. "You're Shadow, right? The one who's supposed to marry Silver?"

"How does everyone know that!?"

Scourge leaned over to him, whispering. "Because everyone knows not to screw around with Silver."

Orchid waved her arms wildly. "Not everyone apparently! That huge explosion cause Silver to spill his smoothie! He's really mad!"

"Why is everyone freaking out about that?" Shadow sighed. "I'm more concerned about the patients being attack by Mephiles."

Scourge laughed. "You've never seen Silver when he's mad, have you?"

Orchid grabbed Shadow's arm. "We'll take care of Mephiles, you go calm Silver down." She dragged him away. The green hedgehog stood there, not really wanting to face the wrath of an angered gay boy. Instead, he followed one of the nurses into the other room.

* * *

Tihocan downed the third cup of juice. He held out the empty cup to Ellsworth and pouted. "Can I please have some more, Uncle Elly?"

The white hedgehog smiled. "Of course. You can have as much as you want." He patted Tihocan's head and filled his cup.

"You're super nice Uncle Elly." He sipped his drink and glanced at the clock on the wall. "I wonder when Daddy will be here."

"Uh, maybe we can ask you father if you can stay for a few days?" The grey hedgehog tilted his head. "I want you to meet my son. There's a strange resemblance between you two. You could be his twin."

"Uncle Elly, have you ever thought that you don't want your son to get married because you're afraid of losing him?" Ellsworth blinked a few times, surprised. "Maybe that's why you want me around, cause I remind you of him?" He took another drink from the cup. "You can't hang onto the past like this. People grow older." Tihocan smiled brightly. "Don't worry! I'm sure your son will never forget you. I'm thirteen, and I still like being babied by my Daddy!"

"You're a very smart little hedgehog." He was going to say something else, but Tihocan's loud gasp stopped him.

"Wow! What is that!?" He pointed and bounced in his seat. "WhatisthatWhatisthatWhatisthat!?"

Ellsworth looked over his shoulder and noticed that Morpheus had just awoken. Its ears were bent back and it appeared to be very tired. "Good morning." It glanced at him, shaking its head. "Tihocan, this is Morpheus. He's my son's." Its ears perked up as the grey hedgehog hugged him.

"You're one of those shapshifters, aren't you? I have one! His name is Nero." Morpheus stepped away and wandered around the room. Tihocan followed him. "Wait, come back!" Ellsworth couldn't tell if it was looking for Silver or running away from the hedgehog chasing him.

"Uh, Tihocan, why don't we leave Morpheus alone for a while?" The demon whirled around and hissed at the child. Its fake quills rose up slightly, warning Tihocan that it would attack if he continued to follow it. Ellsworth stepped between the two. "I'll take you to meet the Princess."

"Yay!"

* * *

Mephiles didn't seem very happy to see Shadow. "What are you doing here?" He found it surprising that everyone in the hospital knew he was marrying Silver but the person who almost killed him a few years ago.

Orchid didn't waste any time talking: she threw a chair at him. "This place is filled with old people, get out before you hurt them!" Before she could do anything else, she was picked off her feet by Mephiles. "Aww, c'mon! Is everyone telekinetic now!?" He tightened his grip on her. She gasped, having trouble breathing.

"Put her down!" Shadow pulled out his Chaos Emerald and snapped his fingers. A spear of light shot out and hit Mephiles in his abdomen. Orchid landed on her feet.

They both stopped their actions when Silver entered the room. It was dead quiet. Mephiles floated down until he was standing on the floor. He stepped back once he noticed the white hedgehog was walking toward him. "Look. At. Me." He tried to brush off the smoothie residue, but to no avail. "Do you have any idea how much bleach I have to use in order to get this out?"

Orchid whispered to Shadow. "Your fiancé bathes in bleach?"

"He does a lot of weird things I don't know of."

"Silver, it's not my fault you couldn't hold onto your-" Mephiles was cut off when the white hedgehog used his powers to push him up against the wall behind him.

"Shut up." Shadow and Orchid glanced at each other and stepped back. "I want this stain off now." Mephiles tried to say something, but more pressure was applied to his chest. "Now."

"A-Alright!"

Geez, Scourge wasn't kidding.

* * *

Lise-chan - Thanks for the review! It means a lot!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Huzzah! A long review! I can't wait to see those pictures! I'm not really a big fan of Manic, though. Silver's my baby. Thanks for the review!

My.life.as.a.caricature - Yay, I'm loved! Thanks for reviewing!

Pocketful of Craziness - Yes, you may use Spenser and torture him in any way you want. Thanks for the lovely review! XD

ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m - LOL Spenser is a mix of everything I like, which is why he can be related to a lot of stupid things. Anyway, thank you for reviewing!

shadilverluvr - You could hug me! It's, like...the same thing! Thanks for the review!


	13. Pirate Ninjas

Still accepting fan characters for cameo appearances.

Sorry about the wait, everyone. School started and right when I wanted to post this the power went out...for three days. It was from Hurricane Ike. Which is BS cause I live up in Ohio. 640,000 of us were without power for nearly two days. It was crazy.

**The Marvelous Misadventures of Shadow and Co. Part 4**

About an hour later, a perfectly white Silver stepped into the lobby. He twirled around and admired his soft fur. He ran over to his fiancé, tackling him to the floor. "Lookie!" He sat up. "Tell me I'm pretty!" He smiled brightly.

"Ugh. You're pretty, Silver. Now, get off." Silver squealed and hugged the hedgehog under him. "Please get off. I'm tired of being knocked onto the ground." He stood when his lover jumped up. "Shouldn't we be –" Suddenly, Mephiles came crawling out of the room. He noticed the white hedgehog and ran off in the other direction. "…I'm going to wait on the ship."

Scourge bumped into him when he turned the corner. "Where are you off to in such a hurry?" He was holding a leash, which was attached to Spenser's collar.

Shadow was curious, but figured keeping his mouth shut about it would be better. "When are we going home?"

"Huh, oh the ship…" His voice trailed off. Apparently, the green hedgehog had forgotten about their voyage to the other side of the lava ocean in order to steal the Scepter of Darkness for Silver's birthday. "I guess we should leave now, then." He turned to Spenser. "Go start up the boat."

"Yessir!" He ripped the collar off his throat and stared at it for a moment. He smiled at Shadow and shoved it into his mouth. "Good hedgehog." He patted his head and skipped off.

The black hedgehog coughed, spitting the collar out. "That was disgusting."

Scourge shrugged. "Eh, you'll get used to it." He dropped the leash. "Let's get out of here. Hospitals smell weird."

Shadow agreed. "I'll go get Silver."

* * *

They were out on the…ocean thirty minutes later. Silver was tired and decided to take a nap downstairs. Spenser was steering the boat and singing a pirate song. Shadow, feeling better, was staring out into the horizon. Scourge was typing away on a laptop he had somehow plugged into the wood. And, Morpheus stayed behind to help the hospital return to where it originally was.

Everything was peaceful and awkwardly quiet, except for the randomly happy verses of song coming from Spenser. Eventually, Scourge fell asleep. He was woken an hour later by a beeping sound coming from his computer. He removed his shades and looked out over the ocean. "S-Stripes!"

He turned around, only to bump heads with Spenser. "Boss! Shadow is downstairs with Silver. He said not to bother him for a whil-"

"Emergency! Uh, Spenser!" The yellow porcupine saluted, ready for any order about to be given. "Escape plan Number 47B!"

"But…I don't have a steamroller…"

"No, that's 47A!"

"So, wait… Is 47B the one with the giant chess pieces?"

Scourge was about to rip his fur out. "47B is the one where you put the boat into hyper drive and get our asses out of here!"

"Oh! _That_ 47B!" He paused. "Wait, this boat has hyper drive?"

"…You did put in the hyper drive…right?" Spenser nodded. "Oh good." He sighed with relief. "Now hurry before that other ship sees us."

"KayKay!" He ran over to the wheel and pushed a red button beside it. Nothing happened. "Uh-oh." He pressed it again. Still nothing.

"Spenser…why am I not dizzy from hyper drive mode?"

A roasted chicken popped up from the floor beside the button. Scourge smacked his forehead. "Hey look, Boss! Hyper roasted chicken!"

"Spenser! You're supposed to be smart! You were created by college scientists!"

The porcupine held up a finger in a matter-of-fact way. "Actually, I was made by _American _college scientists who couldn't get laid. They made me as a comic relief character to impress the ladies."

"And how'd that work out for you?"

"I got arrested."

"…I hate my life."

* * *

"So, Uncle Elly, what do you do around here?" Ellsworth was giving a tour of the palace to Tihocan. It was slightly annoying because he asked every question he could possibly think of, but at least it gave him something to keep his mind off Silver.

"Well, I protect the people who work here. And…sometimes I run irreverent errands." The grey hedgehog poked his head into a random room.

"Uncle Elly! What's this?"

"That's the back entrance to the kitchen." He dragged little Tihocan away. "Let's not stare – The cook doesn't like it when people she doesn't know stare at her."

They continued down the hall with Ellsworth explaining how nearly every single block was put into place. He showed him the garden, the throne room – Luckily Blaze wasn't there – a few random bedrooms, the computer room, and literally everything until they met up with the princess about an hour or two later. Tihocan was extremely interested. He pulled on her shirt to get her attention.

"Ellsworth! I told you no more orphans!" Blaze pushed the hedgehog away.

"He's not a - ! Well, I'm not sure if he's an orphan. Mephiles dropped him off and he told me his father would be here to pick him up." Ellsworth shrugged, but she didn't seemed convinced.

In the past, when Silver was sent into the past to find the 'chicken trigger' as the news had said, Ellsworth had taken up somewhat of a…hobby. Since Mephiles' little game caused the Sol Emeralds to scatter about the island, he had to wander around for days searching for them. While on this search, he found a few destroyed villages along with hungry, homeless children begging for attention with their eyes. Being the big soft, father figure that he is, he fed the children and took them back to the palace to have a place to stay. Needless to say, Blaze wasn't very happy when she came back home.

"Honestly Ellsworth!" She shook her leg, trying to get Tihocan off.

"What am I supposed to do? Leave them there to die?"

"Yay! Death!" Tihocan jumped off Blaze and ran around the two in a circle.

Ellsworth stopped him by picking him up. "He's staying at my place until his father comes looking for him. I just wanted to show him around for a little while."

She crossed her arms and glared at him. "Alright. As long as he stays out of the palace. If I see him in here." She leaned forward and lowered her voice. "It'll be the last time you _ever_ see this palace." She turned on her heel and walked away. A few guards followed her.

"She's scary!"

Ellsworth sighed. "She's only scary when she's mad."

* * *

"Scourge! Stop it, I can walk on my own!" The green hedgehog was dragging Shadow up the steps. "What's wrong with you!?"

"Pirate Ninjas, dude!" He shook Shadow by his shoulders. "Pirate Ninjas! We're gonna die!"

"…Calm down." He stepped away from Scourge.

"Spenser forgot to put the hyper drive in! We have no possible way to get around them! They're going to sink our ship! Or take us hostage and barbeque us! Do you know what I taste like with A1 sauce!?" He ran over to the railing to get another look at the ship. "Holy shit, there's two of them!"

"Wha?" Silver groggily climbed the steps. A blanket was draped over his shoulders. His quills were messy. "What's going on?" He rubbed the sleep from one of his eyes.

Shadow gently removed the blanket and folded it. "Something about Pirate Ninjas." He tried to smooth out his fiancé's quills.

"What's a Pirate Ninja?"

Scourge spoke up before the obsidian hedgehog could. "We're about to find out!" He frantically looked around, noticing an island close to their right. "Spenser! Escape plan Number 36D!"

"The one where we go to the closest island and hid in the trees?"

"I don't care! Go to the island!"

"Aye aye, Captian!" He saluted and spun the wheel. Immediately, the boat responded, quickly turning toward the island. Not expecting the huge jolt, Silver stumbled forward into Shadow's arms. He yawned and almost fell asleep. Unfortunately, the boat bumped into the land, causing everyone to fall forward. "We're here!"

"Thank you, Spenser! We kinda already know!" Scourge tossed a rope ladder over the side of the railing. "Everyone off!"

"Five more minutes…" Silver snuggled against his fiancé, tired. Their peace was interrupted by a loud crash from one of the Pirate Ninja ships. Spenser screamed and jumped off the edge of the ship. The white hedgehog looked up in time to watch a…missle crash into the side of their boat. "Those aren't Pirate Ninjas! Those are Communist Alien Terrorist Pirate Ninjas!" He levitated himself and Shadow onto the island. "Why didn't you say something!?"

Scourge looked dumbfounded. "Seriously Silver?"

"Guys!" Spenser failed his arms. "We should hide before they cook us and eat us like cows!"

Shadow spoke up since he felt like he was being ignored by the Louts and not getting enough things to say. "Where are we going to hide? In the trees or something?"

"To the trees!" Spenser pointed to the sky. "Away!!"

* * *

Pokelad - LOL Silver probably does raid cleaning cabinets. Thanks for the review!

My.life.as.a.caricature - Aww, thank you! Yes, I want Spenser as, like a little brother or something. Thanks for reviewing!

shadowfan13 - OMG! Thanks for reviewing! Even though I don't review your stuff, I still read it. The Sonic X Files is my favorite from you. XD

Kamala11 - Please send it to me! I'd love to see pirate hedgehogs! Thansk for the review!

Lise-chan - The bleach thing was _very_ weird. I was debating whether to keep it or not, but it earned a chuckled from me, so I decided to keep in it. Thanks for reviewing!

Pocketful of Craziness - Yes, poor Shadow was sick with zombie-sea-sickness. I lurve potatoes with lots of cheese. And, yes! Silver's mommy died giving birth to him. It was so sad. Oh, Orchid is from ThE-sAwNiK-fAnDo0m. Thanks for the review! I'll try to e-mail you ASAP. XD

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Don't worry about high school. It'll be fun. I would know, I'm a senior. OMGI'MSOOLD. You should totally show me that picture! And congrats on your DA views! Silver's is mah babeh. Or we could just agree that we both love him equally. Lawl. Thanks for the reviews and figuring out who Tihocan kinda was...I think. XD

Laughter in the Dark - Yeah, Silver's kinda getting into one of those spoiled-brat-love-me-forever-or-I'll-tell-Daddy-on-you kinda persons. I'm gonna try to change that. I'm sorry about your arm! Hope you feel better and thanks for reviewing!


	14. Returning Home

Still accepting fan characters for short cameo appeareances.

OMG. I was too lazy to go back a read this. Please let me know if you find any ridiculous typos.

**The Marvelous Misadventures of Shadow and Co. Finale**

Strange voices could be heard from below them. Silver was clinging to one of the large branches. Shadow was holding onto him, knowing he was afraid. Scourge was perched on a lower branch, holding a pistol in case they were found. Spenser was rocking back and forth, shaking the tree slightly.

Unfamiliar creatures came into their view. Everyone tensed up, well, everyone but Spenser, who was more interested in a squirrel. One of them looked up. Thankfully, Scourge had already taken his jacket off so his fur blended in with the colors of the leaves. A moment later, they returned to where they came from.

Silver sighed in relief, releasing his grasp on his fiancé. Shadow smiled slightly at him to calm him down. Their peace didn't last. A loud snap caught Scourge's attention. "Stripes!" The branch the two lovers were on broke off, causing them to fall into a bush below. The white hedgehog's shriek was heard by one of the Pirate Ninjas.

The three returned and grabbed Silver's ankle. He screamed, digging his claws into the earth and refusing to submit to their will. Shadow landed a swift kick to the alien's head. It released its grip. "Shadow!"

The black hedgehog pushed his fiancé away from their attackers. "Silver, run!"

He held his husband's arm. "I'm not leaving you!" Eventually, more of those strange aliens arrived and dragged the two away. Silver was knocked out while Shadow was beginning to throw a fit. A moment after their kidnapping, Spenser noticed their absence.

"Where's that little white guy at?"

Scourge jumped down, slipping his jacket on. "They took them!" Spenser fell down on his backside. He jumped up in pain and desperately tried to pull his spiked tail off of his bottom. "We have to follow them before they take Stripes back to their planet and use him as a fly swatter!"

"Owwie. I hate having quills on my tail." Scourge shot a glare at him. "What?"

"Go get the ship ready! We need to follow them!" Spenser saluted and off in a random direction. The green hedgehog began rummaging through his pockets for something.

"Hey, Boss!" Spenser called from behind one of the trees. It was amazing Scourge could find him in such a thick forest. "Our ship is on fire."

"What!?" The green hedgehog glanced at it, then proceeded to freak out. "How is our ship on fire!? It's fireproof!"

"It is?"

"Yes! That's how we could sail over the lava ocean!"

"That was lava!?"

Scourge sighed. "Yes, Spenser. What did you think it was?"

"…A lot of red pudding." He placed a finger on his chin. "That's why it burned my tongue…"

"Never mind that!" He grabbed Spenser's vest and dragged him in the direction the Alien Pirate Ninjas went. "C'mon! We have to follow them."

* * *

"Silver?" He gently nudged the white hedgehog, waking him. "Are you alright?" He placed the back of his ungloved hand on his fiancé's forehead, worried. "You don't look-" He was cut off by a another high-pitched squeal.

"Where are we?" He jumped up and grabbed the bars of the cell they were in. "Lemme out!" He attempted to pull the bars loose with no such luck. "Daddy!" He whirled around and tackled Shadow to the cold floor in a tight hug. "I'm scared!"

He sat up, patting his lover's back. "Calm down. Scourge will be here any minute now." He tensed up when one of the Pirate Ninjas entered the room. It didn't have its mask on, and looked like a cross between a green horse and an octopus. Needless to say, it was rather disturbing. The alien placed a camera on one of the bars, it was facing them.

"What's the camera for?" He pulled Shadow closer, frightened. The alien made a strange noise and did a motion with his hands similar to intercourse. Silver's face became bright red.

"What!? Listen, we don't spy on _your _personal life! What makes you think that'd we have sex when we knew there was a camera pointing at us! We're not wild rabbits!" A large laser gun was attached to the bar next to the camera, completely changing Shadow's opinion. "W-We'll get started on that then…"

"That's so gross! I'd never do something like that in a disgusting place like this!" Silver stood, arms crossed. He turned away from the Pirate Ninja, refusing to comply. The gun was fired, barely missing the hedgehog's shoulder. It made a large dent in the wall. "I'll do it!" He paused, narrowing his eyes. "Is this thing going to end up on the internet?" It made a strange sound and left, slamming the door shut. The two lovers glanced at each other.

Shadow sighed. "This is beyond awkward." He was caught off guard when his fiancé kissed him, pushing him down to the floor.

* * *

"Boss!" Spenser was seated in the pilot's seat of a helicopter. He wore a headset which he used to communicate with Scourge, who was seated behind him. "How did you fit a chopper in your pocket?"

"It's a part of the emergency kit!" He pointed to the Communist Alien Terrorist Pirate Ninja's ship. It was painted bright red with a yellow hammer and sickle on the side. "There! Try to get closer." He pulled the Chaos Spear from out of seemingly nowhere. "I really hope they're not using Stripes as a sex doll."

Spenser whirled around, letting go of the controls. The helicopter veered to the left. The green hedgehog latched onto his seat. "They'd do that!?"

"I'm too young to die, Spense!" Realizing his mistake, he took control. Scourge sighed with relief.

"That's awesome." He lowered the chopper enough for the hedgehog to jump down. "What do you want me to do?"

"Land it!" He tried to shout over the sound of the chopper, but the porcupine misinterpreted it. Instead, he jumped down onto the deck, letting the helicopter fall into the lava and explode. "Nice going. Now they know we're here!"

Spenser scratched the top of his head. "But, they're ninjas. Shouldn't they already know?"

"That's not the point!" Before anything else could be said, a harsh jerk was felt throughout the ship. It began to rise into the air. A clear dome covered the exposed deck. And, basically, the pirate ship morphed into a giant alien spaceship. It floated forward slowly, as if trying to decide where to go.

"Wow, this is nice." The porcupine looked around. "It's like one of those environmental dome things. You know," He turned to Scourge. "Where they have this perfect nature system set up in an enclosed area." He took in a deep breath and coughed. "Smells like gasoline, though."

The green hedgehog crossed his arms, thinking. "They'll probably drive this ship into some large building or landmark, so we should probably get off within the next five minutes." He placed a hand on his chin. "And, they probably have Stripes on the lower level of the ship. Seeing as how this is a spaceship, they should also have an escape pod somewhere on the lower levels." He didn't seem to notice Spenser dancing wildly in the background. "We should grab Stripes and Silver and get out of here using the pod." He snapped his fingers. "Spense, this way!"

"OMGWAITFORME!" He skipped after the hedgehog, singing a song about coconuts.

They snuck past a variety of guards before reaching the cell door where Silver and Shadow were being held. "Stay here." Spenser saluted and returned to poking the unconscious Pirate Ninja. Scourge kicked the door down, being welcomed by an unusual scene. He whirled around and removed his shades. He rubbed his eyes as if in pain.

"What happened?" The curious porcupine wanted to peek into the room, but his boss stopped him.

"Nothing. Just….just go get the escape pod ready." He blinked a few times, blinded by the horrible sight.

"Yessir!" He dashed off.

Unfortunately, a passing guard noticed the miserable hedgehog. It proceeded to attack. Scourge wasn't expecting anything and ducked back into the cell room. He slammed the door behind him. The alien ran into it face first. "Did they force you or something?"

Silver pointed to Shadow, who was partly dazed. "It was his fault!" The black hedgehog merely grinned.

"Whatever." Scourge sighed. "Let's go home."

Shadow finally decided to speak up. "But, you never got the Scepter of Darkness like you wanted." The green hedgehog shrugged, not really caring as much as he used to. Silver's ears drooped.

"Sorry Scourgey. Maybe next time?"

He waved a hand over his shoulder. "Maybe." He pushed the door open, staring at the unconscious alien at his feet before stepping over it. "C'mon. Spenser is getting our escape pod ready."

Silver frowned. "Poor Scourge. He sounds so disappointed." He turned to Shadow, who was still grinning.

"We'll finish this later." His fiancé turned a light shade of pink, embarrassed.

They followed the green hedgehog until they came upon a red escape pod. Spenser would be driving it. He was a good person to have if you were planning to create a little havoc, but if you were in an emergency, he wasn't very useful. The pod jolted forward and left the Pirate Ninja ship behind in a puff of smoke. It spun around, doing a few loop and crazy flips thanks to the pilot. But, that all stopped when Scourge slapped the porcupine across his face. Silver yelled at him for it, stating that being a boss meant treated his 'employees' with respect. Shadow didn't say anything, but he figured the yellow nuisance got what he deserved for once.

The steering wheel, or stick in this case, snapped off as they were nearing their destination. As they went spiraling downward to their death, Tihocan noticed them. "Uncle Ellsworth!" The hedgehog looked up from his newspaper. "Look! It's a shooting star! And, it's heading right for us! Is that doublely good luck?"

Confused, he glanced over the grey hedgehog's shoulder, immediately knowing it wasn't a shooting star. "Tihocan!" He picked up the child and dashed out of the house as the pod crashed into it.

"Whoa! Awesome!" Ellsworth watched in horror as his house was completely destroyed.

Once the pod stopped moving, it opened. Shadow was the first to stumble out of it, coughing from all the smoke. He waved a hand in front of his face, unable to breathe. Silver was next, coughing in the same manner and reaching for his future husband. "Shadow! Are you okay?" He was pulled into a comforting hug by the black hedgehog.

"OMGI'MONFIRE!" Spenser jumped out of the escape pod, failing his arms around wildly, as if it would put the fire out on his bushy tail. "Put me out! Put me out!"

Scourge was the last person to emerge from the ship. He used the Chaos Spear as a walking stick. He had been injured during the crash – The steering stick seemed to like him a little too much and had plunged itself into his lower abdomen. No one noticed until he collapsed. "Scourgey! Are you okay?" Silver rolled him onto his back. Shadow pulled out the stick and gave it to Spenser, who promptly ate it, unaware that the fire was starting to spread to…other places.

After a few minutes of struggled, Tihocan finally pulled himself free from the frozen Ellsworth, who had a horrified look on his face. "Daddy! I knew you'd be here!" He grabbed onto Shadow's waist, hugging him tightly. Silver didn't seem to notice, as he was too concerned about his adopted older brother.

"Hey! Let go! I'm not your father!"

"Daddy!"

Silver's ears perked up at the unfamiliar voice. He whirled around and screamed. Tihocan backed away. "CuteCuteCute!" He scooped up the frightened grey hedgehog and nearly squeezed the life out of him. "You're the cutest thing I've ever seen!"

"Daddy! Help! Rape!" Poor Tihocan reached out to Ellsworth, who looked like he was about to explode with anger. "Uncle Ellsworth! Help! Save! Choking! Ack!"

* * *

My.life.as.a.caricature - Lawl, that was actually made by one of my friends in Sociology class. I'm glad you like Spenser and the story! Thanks for reviewing!

Cassy the Hedgehog - Yeah, Spenser's a riot. Thanks for the review!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Nah, I only hate freshmen who are rude and stupid, which is most of them, but you don't seem to fit in that category. Tihocie's is actually Egytpian. I totally jacked it from a Tomb Raider game. OMGIDK, I want to see you picture. I loves looking at Silver, no matter how poorly drawed he is. (I got used to seeing _really _bad art after looking through my sketchbook. XD ) Happy late birthday! And, thanks for reviewing!

Pocketful of Craziness - Whoa. I never knew everyone would love Spenser so much. I'll get the Shadilver love back eventually. I'll admit that I've been ignoring poor Shadize lately. Thanks for the review!

Kamala11 - LOL. I promise to get back on track after the next chapter, (I promised a friend that I'd dedicate it to him.) Unfortunately, the link you sent me couldn't be found. I was bummed out cause I really wanted to see it. Maybe you could send it to me over an email? In any case, thanks for reviewing!

shadilverluvr - Indeed you are! Thanks for the review! XD


	15. Ben the AzzKickorz

_**Sorry, I'm not accepting any other fan characters. (Sad Face)**_

Wow, how long has it been? Sorry everyone, I've been busy with college applications and videogames.

Anyway, this chapters stars one of my best friends. IRL, of course.

Ben the Asskicker belongs to the awesome Revwal. Love him.

**I CAN HAS OWN YOUR SOUL**

The family was forced to reside in Blaze's palace until Ellsworth's house could be rebuilt. The father hadn't spoken to anyone, and was seated at the table with an angered expression. He stirred his coffee with a spoon, refusing to make eye contact with anyone else. Tihocan was pouring syrup on his waffles, drowning them. Shadow was half awake, poking at the food on his plate. Silver wasn't there – He was most likely taking a shower. He _always_ had to be clean. Spenser sat across the table from the black hedgehog, stuffing his face with bacon. Scourge was still sleeping, as always.

"Tihocan, I think that's enough syrup." Shadow spoke up, snatching the empty bottle from the young hedgehog.

"Aww! But, but I wasn't done!" He tried to reach for the bottle, but Shadow shot a glare, causing him to sit back down in his chair.

"Just give 'em the syrup, Blackie. It's not like it'll kill him." Spenser said. He stood, pointing a thumb to himself. "I've drowned my pancakes in syrup my entire life! And, I turned out fine." A goofy smile was on his face.

"Exactly my point." Shadow said, sighing.

"Hey! What's that supposed to-"

Shadow stood abruptly, not wanting to spend the remainder of his morning like this. "Oh gosh, look at that. I got syrup on my fur. Geez, I should go take a shower to get that off." He exited the room quickly. As he did, the bottle of syrup slipped off the table and onto the chair. Little Tihocan picked it up, but frowned when he noticed it was completely empty.

As soon as he did, a groggy Scourge made his way in from a door on the opposite side. He flopped down where the ebony hedgehog once was. Spenser sat back down, licking his plate clean. "Uncle Scourgey," Tihocan tugged at his leather jacket. "Can you get me more syrup?"

"Sure, little guy." He stood and attempted to turn around to the cabinet nearby, but tripped. He fell on his face with a grunt. The yellow porcupine howled with laughter.

"Boss! You got a chair stuck to your butt!" He laughed harder, almost falling back out of his own chair.

Scourge, with his face still buried in the tiles of the floor, groaned. "I hate Mondays."

* * *

Upstairs, Shadow invited himself into a certain bathroom, where a certain someone had just turned off the water. Silver shrieked, surprised. "I thought you were eating breakfast with everyone downstairs." His ebony lover smiled when they hugged. "Ew, why are your hands sticky?"

"Tihocan." Silver understood what he meant by just the mention of the child's name. Although cute and young, Tihocan was a handful, especially when Ellsworth didn't feel up to being a father figure. "He's got a real sweet tooth." He said, slipping his gloves off and washing his hands, removing anything that had soaked through.

"Well, I suppose it's good training for you." Silver was drying his upright fringes with a white towel. "Since I've inherited Daddy's love for little children."

Shadow let out a disappointed sigh. Great, not only did he have to put up with Scourge's smartass attitude, but now he had to care for tiny hedgehogs running amuck and causing trouble. Just the thought made him want to pluck his quills out one by one. He might as well enjoy the childless time they had together. Meaning right now, of course. He pulled his lover into a tight hug, discarding the towel. Silver giggled, leaning back into him.

"So, I decided we should try to speed things up a little." The white hedgehog said softly, turning and wrapping his arm around his lover's shoulders. "Before things get any crazier, we should get married, right?" Shadow nodded, lost in those loving, golden eyes. "So, how's next Wednesday sound?" Suddenly, those eyes weren't so precious to him.

"What!? N-Next Wednesday!? That gives me ten days! You expect me to get everything ready in _ten days_!?" He released Silver from their hug. There was no way he'd be able to write out all the invitations, or find a cake, or prepare the altar, or…anything!

"Calm down," Silver stepped forward, pulling the ebony hedgehog back into an embrace. "Scourge said he already took care of that." Shadow frowned. Great, now there was a chance that Spenser would be the one to bake the cake. He couldn't imagine what the freak would put in there. "Don't worry Shadow. This _is_ my wedding, too. I'll make sure everything is perfect. I just don't want you to be under too much stress right now." He gently kissed his lover, who finally began to relax.

* * *

"Spenser!" Scourge hobbled toward him, holding his bandaged stomach. "Don't do that! It'll-" Before he could finish his sentence, the ship the group had returned in exploded, catching the porcupine on fire for a second time. "…explode." He sighed, leaning on the crutch he had been given. "I told you not to fix it. It's not like we know any of the machinery they used."

"Fire! It burns us!" He squirmed around on the grass, lighting it on fire as well.

"I'd help you, Spenser. Really, I would. I just don't feel like it right now." He glanced back to the ship, noticing someone standing there. "Hey, get away from that! You don't want to end up like him, do you?" He asked, pointing to the poor yellow porcupine.

Whoever it was, apparently a fox, turned to him with a giant, ridiculous smile on his face. He had dark, messy brown hair atop his head and what appeared to be a rocket launcher on his back. "I'm Ben!" He suddenly appeared beside Scourge, who jumped in surprise. "And I'm an Asskicker!"

Spenser jumped to his feet, the fire that was once on him now gone. "Not one of you again! Run for your lives!" He snatched Scourge's crutch, for reasons unknown, and ran off, failing his arms wildly.

The green hedgehog turned his attention back to the strange fox. He cocked an eyebrow. "An Asskicker, huh? So, exactly what does your kind do?"

"Kick ass!" He shouted, punching Scourge's face. "Mwaha!" He ran after Spenser, laughing evilly.

"Hey! That was a cheap shot!" He scrambled to his feet, holding his hurting abdomen. "Hey! Are you listening?" He followed the brown fox. "Get back here!" He skidded to a stop, dirt gathering around his feet. "Oh no," Spenser, the intelligent person he is, led Ben back to the castle. Blaze would be pissed. "Damnit."

Inside, Shadow and Silver were engaging in an intimate moment. The black hedgehog was atop his lover, purring in his ear. Unexpectedly, Spenser burst in. Silver let out a high-pitched squeal and covered himself with a blanket. The porcupine ran about the room, screaming about like a little girl.

"Spenser! What the hell are you doing!?" Ben soon followed, drop-kicking the ebony hedgehog, directly in his mouth.

"Shadow!" Silver jumped off the bed to comfort his fallen fiancé. "Are you alright?" Ben, yet again, drop-kicked the white hedgehog, who was slammed against the wall. He landed on the bed.

"No one can beat my amazing skills of ass kicking!" He laughed evilly for a second time. "I will destroy everything The Lotus Black loves!" His lower eyelid twitched as he exited the room.

Spenser, who was trying to get away, hid under the dining table. Ellsworth was still there, reading the newspaper and trying to find a temporary place for him to stay. Ben waltzed in, grinning wildly. His tail flicked as he scanned the room for his target. The father looked up with an uncaring expression. He pointed at the table, nonverbally telling the hunter that the porcupine was beneath it.

"I found you!" He jumped under the table. A moment later, he scrambled back out, followed by Spenser. "Get it away!" His prey was holding a rabid squirrel that was gnawing away at his arm.

* * *

While Spenser and Scourge were busy with their newfound rival, Shadow was worried about his fiancé. "Silver?" He called, gently tapping the side of his face to wake him. "Silver, c'mon. He didn't hit you that hard." The white hedgehog cracked open his eyes with a soft smile.

"I know," He said. "I just wanted to see your worried face. It's really cute." Silver pulled his lover close, kissing him. They separated after a while, breathless. "Who was that, anyway?"

"Who cares? We were doing something important before, weren't we?"

"I guess, but-" Shadow silenced him by pressing his finger to Silver's lips.

"Shush. Let's just get back to what we were doing." He growled seductively, pushing the white hedgehog down on the bed to resume their lovemaking.

* * *

"I shall not be defeated!" Yelled Ben, removing the launcher from his back and pointing it at Spenser. "I _will _kick your ass before I mysteriously leave without a trace!"

The yellow porcupine, having gotten the squirrel off of his arm, put his hands up in defense. "Ha! Good luck, you fiend! I, Spenser Kakusumi, am impervious to rockets, grenades, and RPGs! HaHa!"

Scourge finally caught up to them. He grunted in pain, tightening his grip on his now bleeding stomach and leaning on his newfound crutch. "Stop it! If Blaze finds out what's happening, she'll kick us out!"

"Silence!" Ben demanded, pointing the launcher to the green hedgehog. "I have already kicked your ass, so your soul belongs to me!" He turned back to Spenser. "So, you say you are not allergic to grenades and rockets, yes?"

"Indeed, good sir!"

"Well, are you impervious to _chainsaws_!?" Spenser's eyes widened in fear as Ben pressed the trigger. The launcher shot out a chainsaw. It flew over the porcupine's head, slicing off a part of his bangs as he attempted to dodge it.

Scourge smiled. "A chainsaw launcher. That's something I haven't seen before." He placed a finger on his chin and began talking to himself. "Hmm, maybe I'll whip one of those up for later." He rambled on about the weapon, and possible additions he wanted to add on.

"Chainsaws?" Spenser shook his head in disbelief. "No way! I… They're my one true weakness! H-how did you know?"

"Ben the Asskicker knows _everything_!" He laughed, smacking Spenser's face with his launcher. He tossed it over his shoulder, no longer having a use for it since he successfully kicked the Lotus' dearly held friends, save for Sonic, who he'd attack later.

"Hey!" Ben whirled around, noticing Shadow standing behind him with an angered expression. "I don't find it funny when people interrupt me when I'm having sex with my fiancé." He cracked his knuckles. "And, I don't like it when people kick me in the face."

Ben placed his hands on his hips, grinning proudly. "Hah! Go on and try it, you pathetic little hedgehog!" He stood there, mocking Shadow and waiting for him to do something. The ebony hedgehog walked forward, clenching his fist. The brown fox took a few steps back. "You cannot defeat me! I own your soul!" He suddenly tripped over the launcher he discarded of earlier.

Shadow cocked an eyebrow as Ben fell over with a loud shout. Spenser stood beside him, scratching the back of his head. "It shoots chainsaws." He stated, pointing to the launcher.

As if on cue, the launcher fired Ben, the supposed Asskicker, into the sky. "Oh no! Ben's blasting off again!" A twinkle in the distance meant that he had gone away to a distance land. Or into the lava. It was hard to tell from where they were.

Scourge stumbled over to them. "Damn! He took the launcher with him!"

Shadow crossed his arms with a sigh. "This is why I'm getting married in Sonic's time period."

* * *

Sorry I'm not responding to everyone's reviews this time. But, I'm very thankful! I promise I'll focus on ADiP throughout winter break just for all of you!


	16. Betsy the Were…Car?

**_Please guys, read this. I'm NOT accepting anymore fan characters. I've got plenty to last me til the end of the story._**

AWHUT? The rating was upped? Gee, I wonder why? Yeah, I felt bad for denying everyone some lovely Shadilver love. So, enjoy this chapter. It's my Christmas present to you.

If there's anyone out there whose in love with Spenser's goofiness, you'll like this chapter too... I hope.

Another thing, I have no idea what was happening before chapter 10, (I'M TOO LAZY TO REREAD), so just pretend Sonic is retarded since it seems like he's hasn't met Shadow or Silver since Dreaming of Paradise. xD

**THIS IS NOT A RIP-OFF OF FUTURAMA.**

"Mmm, Shadow," He moaned loudly, grabbing onto his lover's hips and pushing him in deeper. "More," He mumbled. "Please, more." Shadow growled passionately, his fingers entwined with Silver's. "Ahh… I love it." His toes curled at the pleasure he was receiving.

"Silver," The ebony hedgehog whispered his fiancé's name. "I love everything about you." He said, gently nibbling his lover's ear. "You're still so…tight," He was breathless.

"Stop being so gentle." Silver complained, trying to change his painfully slow thrusts. "Do me," He paused, gasping when his lover hit that special spot. "Harder," Shadow complied. "Harder!" The white hedgehog's grip on the sheets tightened. "Ngh, that's it." He arched his back.

Shadow captured his fiancé's lips in a tender kiss. He slipped his tongue into Silver's mouth, moaning as they fought for dominance. "Oh, Silver!" They suddenly ceased their movements.

"Ugh," Silver sat up, wiping the sweat from his brow. "It seems like it takes you longer and longer each time."

Shadow shrugged. "I like to make it last." They switched places. The ebony hedgehog was now lying on his back with his lover atop him. "Do you think you can make it through round two?" He asked, grinning.

Silver giggled. "Don't underestimate me, big boy."

A knock came to their door. "Are you two done yet? The portal's been up for thirty minutes!"

The white hedgehog sighed with disappointment. He stood, earning an unhappy grunt from his fiancé. "We'll be out in few minutes, Scourgey." He turned to Shadow, giving him a quick kiss on the lips. "Hurry up; you know how impatient he gets."

"But, what about round two?" He sat up. "I was really looking forward to it."

Silver ran a hand through Shadow's messy quills. "You can fuck me some other time. C'mon."

Scourge, with a fresh bandage around his waist, huffed when he saw them. "Finally! What were you two doing in there, anyway? I could've written and published a novel in the time it took you to ejaculate!" Shadow shrugged a shoulder. "In any case, Spenser's already with Sonic waiting for us." He leaned on his crutch. "If you two are done, we can go."

Silver picked up his suitcase, smiling at his lover. "Oh, Scourgey." The green hedgehog looked up, his shades sitting on his forehead. He had an annoyed look on his face. "What about Daddy? I mean, he's going to be there, right?"

"He said he needs to do a few things. He'll meet up with us in a few days."

"What about Tihocan? Are we going to do anything about him?" Shadow shifted his weight. "His parents are probably worried about him."

Scourge shrugged. "I'll figure something out. Now, can we go?"

"Why are you so eager to leave, Scourgey? Do you miss Sonic?"

"No. I miss pain killers." He stepped through the colorful portal, not wanting to wait anymore.

"C'mon Shadow." Silver took hold of his fiancé. The two stepped through the portal together.

* * *

"Welcome to Mobius! Two hundred years in the past, yay!" Spenser outstretched his arms in a greeting. Sonic and Tails were also there. "We've got ice cream and kittens and tacos!" He ran off to a nearby stand, apparently selling tacos.

"He's so…weird." The blue hedgehog laughed. "I guess it's a nice change from Scourge's grumpy attitude."

"Spenser is something else." Shadow wrapped an arm around his lover's waist. "What've you been up to since we left?"

"Nothing but the usual. Y'know: fight Eggman, take a break, save the world, blah blah blah." He smiled at Silver. "It's good to see that someone can make Shadow happy. You have no idea how pissy he was before you got here." The ebony hedgehog frowned, ears flattening against his head.

Silver smiled slightly. "Thanks…I guess." He glanced around, noticing his brother wasn't there. "Where'd Scourgey go?"

Tails spoke up, feeling ignored. "He said something about antibiotics and pain killers." Spenser returned to them, a mouthful of hard-shell tacos. "He said he'd meet up with us at home."

"Do you guys still live at that big house?" Shadow asked, taking the suitcase from Silver, who smiled at him.

"What big house?" Spenser asked, looking at Sonic.

"I've always wanted to ask you this… Why do you look like me?" The cobalt hero cocked an eyebrow.

The porcupine shrugged. "Low budget."

"Ah." He turned his attention back to the other hedgehogs. "It's not that far away." He pointed in the direction of the house. "Let's go."

Tails and Sonic led the way, followed by Spenser, who was happily gnawing on his last taco. Shadow and Silver were behind them. "Try to get along with Sonic, okay Shadow?" The ebony hedgehog rolled his eyes. "I don't want you two fighting before we're married. Just be nice to him."

"I don't think I'll have time to fight with him. Between getting ready for our wedding and being intimate with you, I won't have any time for myself." He pulled his lover closer to him.

"Being intimate with me? What's that supposed to mean? Shouldn't we be saving that for our honeymoon?" Silver smiled, his cheeks a soft shade of pink. "Besides, you can do things like that with me whenever you want."

Shadow chuckled. "There's just something about you that's irresistible."

"Here we are!" Sonic turned to Shadow with a grin. "Remember this place? We've fixed up a few things. But, it's still the same."

Spenser ran up to the front door. "Awesome! What's the inside look like?" He rang the doorbell. "I wanna see!" He turned the handle of the door and shoved it open. In doing so, he accidently whacked Amy in the face. "…I wasn't Spenser!" He stepped over her and ran into the kitchen. "Food!"

"Amy, are you alright?" Tails helped her up. She growled and pulled out her hammer. The fox stepped back. She disappeared into the kitchen. "Amy, wait! He's a guest! Be nice!"

Sonic sighed. "I'm assuming you two are going to be staying in the same room. So, follow me." He trotted up to the second floor. The third door down the hall was theirs. "Enjoy yourselves. I'm going to get Amy before she kills your crazed friend."

It was Silver's old room from before. The white hedgehog walked in and took the suitcase from his lover. "I missed this room." He placed the case down beside the bed and sat on the edge of it.

Shadow stepped in and closed the door. "I did too," He said, purring at his fiancé. "I loved the way this bed squeaked." He pushed Silver and climbed on top of him. "Remember round two? Let's finish that now." He licked his lover's midsection, earning a soft moan. "Shush, Silver. We don't want to draw attention to ourselves."

"Does it really matter anymore?" He asked, sitting up and pushing the black hedgehog onto the bed. "And, yes. I remember round two. Because that's _my_ round, sweetheart." He licked his lips.

* * *

"Ack! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to eat the tuna!" Amy, having whacked Spenser enough to calm herself, stood dumbfounded with Tails in the kitchen. The odd porcupine had just devoured an entire fish from the tank nearby. "OMGWHAT'STHAT!" He pointed at something behind the two. They whirled around, and as they did, he shoved a second goldfish into his mouth and ran.

Amy turned back to him, only to realize he had fled. "Hey! Get back here!" She chased him. "Get out of my house!" She shouted, whacking him on the head with her hammer. "Get out! Get out!"

"Ouch! Okay!" Spenser covered his head as he made a dash for the door. He ran into it face-first before opening it and quickly slipping out.

* * *

"You move your hips _so_well, Silver." He smiled at his fiancé, who was riding him and moving his hips in a circular motion. He held onto Silver's waist, pushing him down as he thrust up into his small frame. "You're so… Ngh."

"I'm so what, Shadow?" He drew circles on the black hedgehog's stomach. "I'm so good at what I do?" He grinded himself against Shadow, earning a pleasured groan. "Mmm… Tell me you love it." Silver took hold of his lover's arms, pinning them above his head.

He growled. "Stop teasing me." His fiancé slowed his movements. "Damnit, Silver."

"Beg for it." He grinned, rocking his hips from side to side.

Shadow struggled to get his arms free. "What?"

"If you want it, beg for it."

The ebony hedgehog cursed under his breath. "Silver, I don't want go through this right now."

"What do you mean?" He asked with a pout. "You don't want me?"

He groaned when his loving fiancé stopped his actions completely. "You know I want you. I always want you. I need you. So, just…please. Don't stop."

Silver leaned down and kissed his lover deeply, releasing his arms. Shadow used this opportunity to get what he wanted. He picked the white hedgehog up and pressed him against the wall opposite to their bed. "Shadow, what-Ahh! Y-Yes! What are-Ahh, more!"

A knock came to their door, causing Silver to silence his outbursts. "Mind not breaking down our wall?" It was Sonic's voice. "Everyone can hear you downstairs!"

"For opposites…Sonic and Scourgey have a lot in common."

"Shh," Shadow pressed himself closer to his lover. "I'm almost done."

* * *

As Sonic was coming down the staircase, a knock at the door caught his attention. He opened it, not surprised to see Spenser standing there with a giant, goofy smile on his face. "Hi," His grin widened. "I'm Spenser!"

Sonic sighed. "Yes, I know." He pushed open the door to allow the porcupine inside. "Amy's calmed down from before, so it's safe to come back inside."

"I got married!" It was an unrelated response, but it got the cobalt hedgehog's attention.

"What? Who would marry you?"

"Her name's Betsy! Wanna come meet her?" Sonic stepped outside, finding a large, bright red Hummer in their driveway.

"You married…a truck?"

"Ain't she beautiful?" Spenser let out a dreamy sigh. "It was love at first sight."

"You married a truck?"

"She's not just any truck! She's _my _truck!"

Sonic shook his head in disbelief. "I'm going to kill myself." He walked back into the house.

Scourge had finally made it, and seemed to be doing better with his wound than before. "Yo," He greeted the blue hedgehog as he walked in. "What's wrong with Spenser?"

"He married a truck." He said, blankly staring at his evil twin.

He sighed, shaking his head and rubbing his temples. "Ugh, again?"

"This isn't the first time?" He sounded surprised.

"Nah. Last time he married a satellite."

"What happened?"

Scourge snorted. "I rigged it to set on fire." He snickered, memories returning to him.

The two immediately shut up when Silver entered the room. He sat down on the couch and smiled at his brother. "So, you finally decided to join us?" Sonic asked, closing the front door and locking Spenser outside.

"Yeah, well. You know Shadow."

"No. Not really. And, frankly, I'm glad I don't."

* * *

The rest of the day played out plainly, which was a nice break for Scourge and Shadow, seeing as how they've both had enough of the craziness engulfing their lives. After dinner, everyone decided to allow Spenser back inside, or at least check up on him. When it comes to someone like him, you'd never know what trouble he could get into. Nevertheless, he was asleep in his new Hummer. Silver thought it was cute and had borrowed Sonic's camera for a quick picture. The porcupine was dragged back inside and placed on the couch for the night.

Everyone else returned to their respected places. Sonic chose to sleep outside in a hammock he had set up. Tails explained that the blue hedgehog always slept outside for fear of waking next to Amy. Silver and Shadow were in the same bed, as usual. Morpheus had unexpectedly arrived after the two had dozed off, and made itself comfortable on the floor. Scourge was still up when midnight came round. He was designing a module for a chainsaw launcher.

He sighed quietly to himself and took another swig from his energy drink. He was in the dining room, since the table here provided the most room. The green hedgehog just couldn't bring himself to figure out how to active the chainsaw as it was being shot out of the launcher. Maybe if he added some sort of timer…but, then one wouldn't be able to fire it freely. He scratched his head in frustration.

Scourge was rudely interrupted by the sound of an engine starting up. He didn't think much of it at first, believing that Spenser went outside to check up on his beloved truck. But, when the sound persisted, he decided to check it out. He slipped on his leather jacket and stormed into the living room. There, on the couch, was a sleeping Spenser. He was snoring loudly with his mouth opened. That poor pillow…

Finding the chain of events weird, he stepped outside. The bright red Hummer was gone. Yet again, he didn't think much of it. When he returned inside, Shadow was there to greet him.

"What's that sound?" He whispered, groggy from just waking. Morpheus sat at his feet. "It's annoying and I can't get any sleep."

"Sorry Stripes." He shrugged. "If I knew you wouldn't be hearing it right now."

"Move," He pushed the green hedgehog away and walked outside. The cold air was the perfect temperature for Morpheus, whose tail was wagging by now. The sound had suddenly died down. "Hmm, that's strange." He looked down at the black pet. "You heard that right?" It nodded with a snort.

Scourge stood beside him, hands in his pockets. "I just hope it's not as bad as the Pirate Ninjas. That set of chapters was just horrible. I'd rather scoop my eyes out with a plastic spoon than go through that again."

"I totally agree." Shadow yawned. Morpheus mimicked him. "Whatever it was, it's gone now."

"You should get some sleep. We've got a big day tomorrow if we're going to meet that deadline for your wedding." He grinned.

"Whatever." Before the three could head back inside, something caught the alien's attention. It snarled at the darkness, ears bent back. "What's wrong with you?" Shadow squinted his eyes, but he wasn't able to see anything.

Suddenly, two large headlights flashed on, blinding the hedgehogs. Morpheus ran back inside to protect Silver. "Hey! It's almost one in the morning! Turn those off!" Angry, Scourge slipped on his shades. Before them, on the dew covered grass, sat an old, red, oversized Ford truck. Its engine roared as it jerked forward. The green hedgehog reacted quickly and pulled Shadow out of the way. "Is that Spenser's truck?"

Shadow, now able to see clearly, let out a shout of surprise when the vehicle tried to run him over by backing up. He dove to the side. "I thought you said nothing weird would happen here!"

"It's Spenser! There's nothing I can do about that!"

"Why'd you bring him with you!?"

"What do you want me to do? Send him on an impossible mission to Hawaii?"

"Scourgey! Look out!" Silver called down to them from his open window. The truck barely missed the green hedgehog as he stumbled back in an attempt to dodge it.

Spenser rushed out of the house, blocking the truck's path. "Betsy, stop it!" He outstretched his arms. "This isn't right!" All the commotion had attracted the attention of the other housemates. Everyone had gathered around by the front door. "I know you're not a monster! You don't have to do this!"

Shadow leaned over to Scourge, whispering to him. "Is he talking to the truck?"

He nodded. "I think so."

The engine of the vehicle had suddenly calmed. "Please, Betsy! I married you because of who you are on the inside! Not the outside!"

Sonic walked over to the two other dumbfounded hedgehogs. "What is wrong with him?"

Scourge shook his head slowly. "I've been trying to figure that out for years."

"I'm sorry Betsy!" He began to tear up. "But, if you keep trying to kill my friends," He paused for dramatic effect. "I'm going to file for divorce!" The engine roared loudly. The truck sped forward, ramming into the side of the house. Silver squealed, falling down from the impact. He stood quickly, leaning on Morpheus as the house shook. "Betsy, no!" The vehicle backed up slightly, then slammed into the house a second time. The white hedgehog slipped out of the window, landing safely in his lover's arms. "Stop it!" It suddenly turned toward him, headlights glowing red with anger. "ARGH!" He ran down the street as fast as he could, which wasn't fast compared to the truck.

Once the two had disappeared into the distance, the housemates gathered around the hole to see the damage. "Sonic," Amy grabbed onto his arm. He pulled it away from her. "Look at what he did to our house…"

"Nah, it's not that bad," Scourge stepped into the gaping hole, inspecting it. "Tails and I can have it back to normal with some wood and duck tape."

Silver was now standing on his feet, worried about Spenser. "Morphy." The alien perked up. "Go after Spenser and make sure he isn't killed." It shifted into a cat-like form and ran down the road in the direction the two went.

"I'm going back to bed." Shadow sighed unhappily.

* * *

ARGH! The Lotus is finally answering reviews! Why is she so fricken lazy!?

Lise-chan - Ah, yes. That was his idea. Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad it made you laugh! I have a habit of entwining bad humor into things like this. XD

XxSkyFoxGirlxX- I know, right? I haven't updated since the cows came home. ZOMG. I have glasses too! We can be glasses buddies! Mine change color from brown to blue depending on how they feel. I'd steal Scourge's launcher too, for fear of being licked by Ben or something. Anyway, thanks for the review!

Cassy the Hedgehog - Indeed! Thanks for the review!

Pokelad - LOL I take care of that at school. Thanks for reviewing!


	17. The Scepter of Love

I totally just got a Wii for Christmas.

**WHERE THE FUCK IS THE B BUTTON!?**

Spenser had returned with Morpheus late in the morning. He had what appeared to be a black eye. Silver seemed to be the only one worried about him. Shadow, when he had awoken, had talked with Scourge about sending him away. Thankfully, the green hedgehog agreed with everything he said.

"It's okay, everyone!" Spenser announced. "I divorced Betsy." He turned to Amy. "I'm single, y'know."

"Eww!" She cried out in disgust.

"Not you! The lady behind you with the big boo-"

"Spenser!" Scourge took the porcupine's arm before he became an enemy of Rouge as well. "I've got an important job for you."

"Does it involve peanut butter?" He asked in a serious, concerned manner.

The green hedgehog cocked an eyebrow. "…No."

"Good!" His goofiness returned.

"I need you," He handed Spenser a plane ticket. "To go to Hawaii and find the biggest cockroach you can." Sonic had entered the room at this point, immediately becoming interested in their conversation. He stood beside Scourge, drinking a glass of clear soda.

The yellow porcupine seemed confused. "How am I going to get to Hawaii from Mobius?"

"Ask Tails."

"So..." His voice trailed off. "You want me," Another puzzled pause. "To find you a giant cockroach?"

"Yeah. Something around three feet." He used his hands to demonstrate how long he wanted it to be.

Spenser shrugged. "Well, I know how you like your big cockroaches."

Sonic chocked on his drink. He snorted and laughed at Scourge, who glared at him intensely. "Somehow I always knew you liked _cock_roaches." He said, emphasizing the first syllable.

He pushed the blue hedgehog away. "Get out of here!" He turned back to where Spenser was, but the yellow porcupine had already vanished. "There! He's gone, Stripes."

Shadow, who was sitting comfortably on the couch, let out a happy sigh. "Finally. How long do you think it'll be before he returns?"

Scourge shrugged and sat down beside his friend. "I don't know. A couple weeks?" He snorted. "That is, if he ever figures out how to get to Earth."

They sat in peaceful silence for the first time in months. Fifteen minutes later, when Shadow was just about to doze off, a knock came to the door. "I'll get it!" Sonic skidded to a stop and opened it, surprised to be hugged by a short, dark grey hedgehog.

"Hi, Uncle Sonic!" Shadow's ears perked up. That voice sounded very familiar. "Is Scourgey here?"

"Uh, yeah. Come on in." He pushed the door aside and allowed little Tihocan in.

"Daddy!" He immediately rushed over to Shadow when he caught sight of him. The ebony hedgehog was brought into a crushing hug. "I missed you!"

"It's good to see you too." He sighed, having given up on trying to convince the child that he wasn't his biological father. He patted Tihocan's head.

"Uncle Scourge! I have a present for you from Elly." He stood and removed a brown bag he had slung of his shoulder. "He said you'd know what to do with it."

"Aw, that's nice of you." Scourge took the bag and pulled out the Scepter of Darkness he had wanted ages ago. "No way, how did he get this?" Little Tihocan shrugged. "Awesome."

Sonic entered the room, finally noticing the resemblance between the grey hedgehog and his supposed father. "Whoa! Shadow! I didn't know you had a kid!" He ran over to them. "Does Silver know? Did you cheat on him? With who? Rouge? Amy? Vanilla? Uh…Cosmo!? No-No-No-Wait! It was with Maria's reincarnated hedgehog form!" He spoke everything in one breath, excited.

Tihocan laughed. "I don't have a Mommy, Uncle Sonic. You know that."

"I do?"

"Yeah! Remember? Daddy told you last, last week when we went to visit him."

Shadow cocked an eyebrow. "Visit?"

Tihocan seemed confused by all the questions. "Yeah, you were locked up. They had you in this big, steel thing! And, you had tubes in your arms to keep you from moving cause the Doctor said you would kill me." He hugged Shadow. "But, it's okay! Because you're back to normal!"

Scourge twirled his finger beside his head, indicating that the child was crazy. "Well, have fun with your family reunion. Imma go try this bad boy out." He stood and exited the room. Curious, Sonic followed him.

"Uh," He pushed Tihocan away. "I better go with Uncle Scourge to make sure he doesn't hurt himself." Shadow stood while the grey hedgehog remained on the couch. "Morpheus!" The alien instantly materialized in front of him. "Here, play with him until I get back."

"But," He called, but the ebony hedgehog had already left. He looked down at Morpheus, who hissed at him. Apparently, it still remembered being chased around the house. "Daddy? He doesn't like me…" He slowly stood. "G-Good Morpheus." He attempted to sneak into the other room, but it lunged forward. "Waa!" Tihocan ran.

* * *

Outside, Scourge had challenged the blue hedgehog to a little sparing fight, just to test out the actual powers of the Scepter. He tapped the dark purple gem against the palm of his hand. It was glowing, but didn't seem to react to anything he did. "How do you turn this thing on?" He pointed it toward the sky. "Scepter of Darkness powers, activate!" Nothing happened. "Damn!"

Sonic was standing across from him, arms crossed. "C'mon Scourgey-Kun. Hurry it up. I've got other things to do."

"Don't call me that!" He tapped the scepter harder against his hand. "Why won't you work!?" He shook it vigorously. "Work, damnit!" It suddenly glowed brighter, engulfing Scourge in a purple light. Shadow's ears perked up.

When the light vanished, the green hedgehog let out a triumphant shout. Shadow stood, wandering over to the cobalt hero to make sure what he was seeing was correct. "Uh, Scourge." They spoke in unison. Sonic pointed at him.

"What?" He looked down at himself and dropped the scepter."Gah!" He was dressed in a dark purple Sailor Moon outfit, complete with miniskirt, ribbons, long gloves, pointed boots, and a puffy shirt. Scourge held down the hem of the skirt. "What the fuck!?" His face was bright red.

The wind suddenly blew softly, causing the skirt to rise up slightly. Scourge struggled to keep it in place. Sonic smiled widely. "Wow, you look good in a skirt." He walked forward. Knowing what he wanted, the green hedgehog ran off, desperately trying to keep the skirt from revealing anything. "Come back!"

"No! Get away from me!"

Shadow picked up the strange scepter, inspecting it. It did appear just like the Scepter of Darkness: it had the feathery wings wrapped around the gem and a metallic look. There was also a tag attached to the bottom. He read it aloud. "_Scourge. This is for destroying my house. Love, Dad._" He sighed, shaking his head. It was sad that a grown man had to resort to such actions to get revenge on his oldest, adopted son. But, looking at the torture it was causing him, it was a pretty damn good idea.

"Get away! AGH!" Scourge cried out when he was tackled to the ground by an obsessive blue hedgehog. "Get off! Stripes, help!"

Before Shadow could formulate a response, Tihocan ran over to him, hugging his waist and wailing like a baby. "Daddy! Morpheus is mean!" The ebony hedgehog glanced up at the sliding door leading to the inside of the house. The black alien, who had shifted into a dark version of Spenser, was pacing back and forth, waiting for the child to come near it. "He bit me!" He cried, revealing his bloodied arm.

"Oh, you poor thing." His fatherly instincts kicked in. He crouched down to Tihocan's level. He rotated the child's arm, noticing the wound was deep for a small bite. "Let's wrap that up." Though reluctant, the grey hedgehog followed him back toward the door. "Bad Morpheus!" It was given a harsh slap on its snout. "Bad…alien thing!" It hissed at him, ears back.

"Daddy! I'm scared!" He hid behind his supposed father, keeping a close eye on Morpheus.

"Shadow!" He jumped at the harsh voice, turning to meet Silver's angered gaze. "What did you do?"

"Me!?"

The white hedgehog ignored him, picking up a crying Tihocan. "I can't believe you would do something like this to a child! You should be ashamed!"

Shadow shook his head. "What!? I didn't do anything! It was Morpheus!" He pointed to where the alien once was. "Wha-He was here!" By the time he looked back up, Silver had gone into the other room. He groaned, annoyed with his fiancé, and flopped down on the recliner nearby.

"What's wrong with you?" Scourge walked inside, closing the door before Sonic could get to him. The outfit he wore was torn in various places. The gloves were missing.

"Ah, y'know. The usual."

* * *

HOLY CRAP. I HAVE OVER 100 REVIEWS. THANKS GUYS!

Pokelad - Cough, I totally knew it was this story. Thanks for the review!

Cassy the Hedgehog - Lawl, thanks. I'm a bitch, so the wedding will probably be the last chapter.

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Couldn't we all live off hedgehog sex? Thanks for reviewing! XD

Crazy Muffin Assassin - And Spenser would say: 'Do you have chocolate? Spenser likes chocolate! ...GIVE SPENSER CHOCOLATE.' Then he'd proceed to promptly attack you. XD Thanks for the review.


	18. Getting Fitted

**RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE. This story is almost finished. I'm also thinking about uploading a new one about Tihocan's past. But, I'm sure unsure about posting it since I'm not really the type of person to write a story based solely on a fan character. Tell me if you guys wanna read it, and I might post it if everyone's curious.**

Lawl. It's bolded so it'll get your attention.

Poker belongs to Silabus' Taco  
Frost belongs to Crazy Muffin Assassin

**OMGIMMAJAMESBOND!**

"Well, in any case," Scourge had finally gotten that ridiculous outfit off. "We need to take you over to get fitted for tux."

"My what?"

Scourge cocked an eyebrow. "Your tuxedo. For your wedding?"

He groaned, sinking down into the chair that suddenly seemed so comfortable. "I'm already black and white. Can't we just leave it at that?" He was pulled to his feet before he could say anything else.

"C'mon, Stripes. I didn't like my first tux either. Just suck it up and stop being a baby." He dragged the ebony hedgehog into the kitchen.

"What did you need a tuxedo for?"

"A Halloween party." He grinned. "I was James Bond."

"Somehow I could see that." He said, imagining Scourge in a black tuxedo with a small handgun outside of someone's window. He'd barge in and have an epic Mortal Kombat styled shootout with whoever was in there.

Scourge sighed. "Everyone says that. I don't particularly agree." He shrugged. "I'm too loud to be a spy. Anyway," He pointed to the front door. "Go wait for me outside. I'll be right there."

Shadow complied. He met up with Sonic and Tihocan. The blue hedgehog was attempting to get inside the locked door. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know who this kid is," He spoke in a whisper so the child wouldn't hear. "He keeps following me around and calling me 'Uncle'. What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Uncle Sonic," He tilted his head to the side. "What are you talking about? Are we going to the amusement park soon?"

Sonic's ears folded back. "See!?"

"Just relax. Tihocan's from the future. He probably met you when he was younger."

"Well," He crossed his arms. "Apparently I moved. Because I don't remember there being an amusement park in Soleanna."

"You probably moved back to Station Square."

"Do they have an amusement park there?"

Shadow shrugged. He crouched down to the child's level. "Hey, Tihocan. Can you tell Daddy what year it was before you met us?"

"2019." He smiled brightly.

Scourge had somehow ended up beside them, catching onto their conversation. "That's almost ten years from now." He placed a hand on his chin. "That doesn't make sense. If Silver stays in his time, and you go with him, there's no possible way he could've met Sonic."

"Wait," Shadow glared. "Are you saying he's related to me _and_ Silver?"

"Tihocan doesn't have a mommy!" The three ignored him.

"You couldn't see the resemblance?" Sonic sounded surprised.

"Pushing aside the fact that both of you are males, he could've lost his memory during time travel."

"That's possible?" Shadow hadn't known there were side effects.

"Memory loss, fractured bones, nausea and vomiting, missing organs, and on rare occasions you could cause a rip in the fabric of space and end all existence."

Shadow was dumbfounded. He didn't know there were so many risks in time traveling. Tihocan had a sad expression, wondering why everyone was ignoring him. Sonic poked his belly. "M-Missing organs?"

"Why didn't you tell us this before?"

Scourge shrugged. "I thought you knew."

"I wanna end all existence!" Tihocan threw his hands up into the air and giggled. "I bet that'd be fun to watch!"

The green hedgehog patted the child's head. "That would be a very big mess to clean up." He turned back to Shadow. "We need to get going." He glared at his blue counterpart. "Stay out of my room and don't touch the blueprints to my chainsaw launcher."

"What's makes you think I would do that?"

"It's just an educated guess. Take care of Tihocan while we're gone." He dragged a reluctant Shadow away.

The young grey hedgehog looked up at him with big eyes. "Uncle Sonic? Are we going to the amusement park?"

"Uh, go stand in the middle of the street and dodge cars, I'm sure it's the same thing."

"Sonic!"

The blue hedgehog jumped in surprise. He whirled around to find Silver standing there. "I didn't mean it literally!"

"I would hope not."

* * *

Spenser opened his eyes, welcomed by the bright sunlight. He stood, brushing the sand off his vest. "Where is I?" He looked around, seeing nothing but sand, water, and palm trees. "Oh! Right! Hawaii!" He rushed into a forest-like scene and bumped into someone. "Kiya!" He got into a defensive state.

A white rabbit cocked an eyebrow at him, arms crossed over his chest. He had messy pink hair that covered part of his right eye. He wore dark grey pants and a black top accompanied with a scarf almost the same shade as his hair. Spenser poked his belly. "What are you doing?"

"Whoa! Your accent! It's all Frenchy! You're a French Emo! OMGOMGOMG. I've never seen one before." He poked the rabbit again. "Say something dark and Satanic!"

"…"

"Aw, please? OkayOkayOkay. Say something in French!" Spenser bounced up and down, excited.

"…"

"Oh, I'll help! Bonjour! Oh oh ho ho ho!" He spoke in a fake French accent, mocking the white rabbit. "Oh, look at me! I'm French! Fromage! Oh ho ho! Croissant! WaitWaitWait!" He pulled a Sharpie out of his pocket and scribbled something on his index finger. He placed it under his nose, giving himself a poorly drawn mustache. "Sacrebleu!"

His actions earned him a harsh slap across the face. "I speak English."

"Ow!" He rubbed his cheek. "Wait… Are you from Canada?"

"No."

"Sacrebleu!"

"Shut up!"

"Okay!" Spenser wiped an invisible tear from his eye. He sighed, trying to calm himself. "Sorry. I'm Spenser." He held out his hand. The rabbit merely stared at it. "So, what's your name?"

"Poker."

"Pfft…" The yellow porcupine howled with laughter, leaning against a palm tree for support. "No, waitwaitwait, say that again!"

"Shut up!" He slapped Spenser again.

"Sorry!" He held his injured face. "So, do you live around here?"

Poker shrugged. "You could say that."

"Awesome! I need help finding a three foot cockroach. Do you think you can help me?"

"…Why do you need a giant cockroach?"

Spenser shrugged. "Boss wants one. He'll probably sic it on that crazy, pink hedgehog. So, can you help?"

"Well, I don't have anything else to do." He nodded with a smile. "Sure, I'll help."

"Huz-Zah!"

* * *

"Hold still!" Scourge said, trying to untie the measuring tape from Shadow's leg.

"I honestly don't see how this'll get me a tuxedo."

The green hedgehog tried shaking the tape off his arm. He had somehow gotten the two tangled in it. "Would you rather try on one or twenty?"

Before the ebony hedgehog could retort a white hedgehog with a shade of light blue lining his quills gave them a strange look. He was holding an armful of clothes. "Uh, can I help you two?"

"No, we're fine, thank you."

"Yes. Please help us." Shadow said, pushing Scourge away with his foot. "Just ignore him." The green hedgehog tried to say something, but it was muffled by his friend's shoe.

He placed down the pile of clothes and unraveled them by tugging on the measuring tape. "Trying to find a tuxedo?" He chuckled.

Scourge stood. "Yeah. Stripes here doesn't want to get measured."

Shadow glared at him. "Maybe if someone knew how to use the tape I wouldn't be so unwilling!"

"Maybe if _someone_ didn't kick me in the face this wouldn't have happened!"

"Are you saying this is my fault?"

"I'm not saying this is my fault!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Hey!" The blue and white hedgehog shouted, getting them to stop their argument. "Calm down. I'll help you. I'm Frost."

"Scourge. That's Shadow. He's the one who needs the tux."

"Right. Follow me."

* * *

"This is a really nice beach." Spenser noted, scooping up a handful of sand and letting the grains slide through his ungloved fingers. "Betsy and I would like to live here."

"The beach is nice, but it gets really hot during the summer." Poker said. "I hope your heat tolerant. If not, we can stop by and get a drink later."

Spenser laughed, placing his hands on his hips. "I beat Silent Hill 5 on suicide mode! Nothing can hurt me! Even heat!"

The white rabbit shrugged. "Suit yourself."

A moment later, Spenser was headfirst in the ocean. "Why is it so damn hot!?"

"I told you."

"Geez! This is worst than Hell! I mean, at least Satan has air conditioning!" Poker shook his head. Suddenly, something from under the sand lifted Spenser up. "Wha?" He looked down, noticing that he was sitting on top of a giant crab. "Wow, you're a big boy! My name's Spenser!" He reached his hand down in a greeting, but the crab snapped at it with its claw. "Yeow!"

"Are you quite done?" He asked, arms crossed.

"Let's take Mr. Crabby with us! Onward!" He pointed, and the crab moved itself in that direction.

"…This is ridiculous."

* * *

"Come on out Shadow." Frost called. He was standing beside Scourge, who was digging through his pocket for something.

"I look weird!"

"Hurry the fuck up, Stripes! I'm hungry." He pulled out black portable gaming system and flipped up the screen, revealing a second one beneath it. "There's a good place down the street." Frost tilted his head, trying to figure out what the green hedgehog had. A silver ring was on the back. Inside the circle, in similarly colored letters, was the word Psp.

"Psp? What's that?"

"Huh?" Scourge cocked an eyebrow. It took him a while to understand what the white hedgehog was asking. "PlayStation Portable."

"Oh! PSP. I thought it said 'Psp'."

"Right," He sounded uncaring. "Stripes, if you don't come out here _right now_, I'll go in there myself and drag you out!" He slid the screen down and shoved it back in his pocket.

"Alright!" Shadow stepped out, wearing a black suit, a white collar shirt on the inside, and a matching tie. His ears were bent against his head and his shoulders were slugged down. "I'm glad I only have to do this once."

Frost crossed his arms. "Stand up straight." The ebony hedgehog complied. "It looks a little tight around the waist." He reached for Shadow's belt, but his wrist was snatched.

"I'm only gay for one person."

"I wasn't gonna-!" He stopped, shocked. "I was trying to see if your belt fit right!"

"It does, thank you."

Scourge looked away, pretending as if he didn't see anything. "Are we done then?"

Frost took one last look at Shadow and nodded. "Yup." The black hedgehog immediately went back into the dressing room to take the tuxedo off. "Are you planning on renting or buying?"

Scourge pulled out his wallet. He opened it and a little, white moth flew out. "Uh…"

"Something wrong?"

"…N-No." He cursed himself for buying so many parts for his chainsaw launcher when he was too lazy to head to the junkyard. "Um… Stripes!"

"What?" Shadow walked over to the register, holding the suit that he had placed back into the plastic covering. He peered down at the green hedgehog's wallet. "You don't have any mone-"

"SSSSSHHHH!" He covered the black hedgehog's mouth. Scourge smiled at Frost. "We'll be right back." He pulled Shadow behind a clothes rack. "Don't let the cashier know!"

"Are you kidding me!? I'm not paying for this!" He shoved the price tag in Scourge's face. "I don't even get paid this much in a month!"

"Shush." He demanded, his voice low. "Look, I spent all my money on chainsaw parts,"

"Why the hell would you need chai-"

"Shut up! I'll pay you back later."

"How? You don't even work!"

"I know a guy in America who distributes and designs weapons for the military. I was planning on sending him the launcher when I was finished." He backhanded Shadow when he was about to say something. "He pays me a shit load depending on how many were made. So, just purchase it now, and I promise I'll pay you back. Okay?"

"Why the hell did you hit me!?"

"Never mind that! Just buy the damn suit!"

The two returned to a very confused hedgehog, who caught bits and pieces of their conversation. "Um…are you ready?"

"Sure." Shadow handed him a credit card. It was swiped, and they were on their way.

"Do you want to eating now or at your party?" Scourge hurried down the road to a nearby bakery. He stared at the warm pastries in the window.

"Party? What party?"

"Your bachelor party, duh."

"I thought you said you weren't going to throw one."

"I did," He shrugged. "But, then I heard Silver was having one, so I decided you should have one too."

"Is Spenser going to be there?"

"I hope not."

"Why's that?"

"Spenser isn't exactly…normal…around women."

* * *

"Is this what you came for?" Poker pointed to a giant cockroach sleeping behind an old refrigerator. It seemed to be atop a pile of rotted food.

He took a measuring tape from the large crab, who was waiting for them outside the window. "Yup, that'll work." He tossed the tape over his shoulder and tapped the roach. "Mr. Cockroach? Wakey wakey." It awoke and hissed at him. "AHHH! It's possessed!"

"Relax. It probably thinks you're after its food."

A light bulb appeared over Spenser's head. His ears flicked. "I got an idea!" The white rabbit touched the bulb, realizing it was real.

"You're a strange person, Spenser."

Out of seemingly nowhere, he revealed a flamethrower. He ran outside and returned five minutes later with a large plate of steaming crabmeat. "Mr. Roach! You can have all of this smelly food if you come with me!" It jumped onto his back, agreeing. "Back to the portal!" He turned to Poker. "Are you coming?"

"Yea-Wait, with you?" He stopped himself, wanting to be sure.

"Yuppers."

"No."

"Kay, bye Mr. Emo French Guy!"

"It's Poker…"

* * *

Cassy the Hedgehog - Lawl, thanks! I did indeed have a good Christmas. Santa was very generous.

Crazy Muffin Assassin - No! Tihocan is my baby! He is off-limits to _everyone_. Thanks for reviewing! XD

Pokelad - Maybe Sonic's been hanging around her for too long or something. Thanks for the review!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX - Ah, I missed these long things, (THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.) Yay! Tablet! I has one, but it's for school. I can't draw as well on it as I can on paper. Anyway, I might've said Tihocan was their son, but he's not. There's this giant, complicated, gorey story behind his existence. I was going to reveal it in the next Paradise story, but I might actually post up a separate story. I don't wanna disappoint you, but Scourgey's too stupid to finish the launcher before this story ends. I know, it's depressing. Thank you for leaving a super long review! It made me happy!


	19. Party Crashers

Next to last chapter!11!1!

Huuuuuurrr. I love Spenser. He's just so...weird.

**Who would invite an 8-year-old to a bachelor party?**

"You're serious, aren't you?" The two hedgehogs, one with an armful of treats, were standing in front of a night club. The moon had risen faster than they had hoped, and the day was almost over.

"Not really. I mean, it'll just be the two of us since I never sent out invitations." Scourge shoved another truffle into his mouth. "And…you're going to have to pay for everything."

Shadow's ears flattened against his head. "Take my credit card. I'm going home." He handed over his wallet.

"You don't have any cash!? Geez, Stripes. A lot of good that'll do me." He tossed the item back to its owner. "Why don't we just go spy on Silver?"

Now _that_ sounded like fun. Shadow normally wasn't into spying on people, mostly because he didn't care. But, he was always curious on what his fiancé did with the girls whenever he wasn't around. And…maybe he'll fight with Amy. He'd love to see that. "Alright, James Bond. I'll go with you."

"If you call me that one more time I'll shoot you." They began walking back home.

"Sure thing, Mr. Bond."

"You just wait till my chainsaw launcher's finished."

* * *

Silver rushed into the room with an airy laugh. Rouge followed him. "More lemon squares!"

"Yay!" Tihocan took the plate and shoved a few into his mouth. "You make the bestest food ever!"

"Aww, thanks." He took a seat beside Cream, who had her chao in her lap.

"So, Silver," Amy reached for one of the pastries, but was rejected when the small, grey hedgehog pushed her away. "Where are you planning to go for your honeymoon?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. Shadow said it would be a surprise."

"Better hope he doesn't forget." Rouge said. She was sitting on the edge of Amy's bed.

"What do you mean by that? He's not a forgetful person."

"True. But, he's never been in a real relationship before and doesn't really know what to do. Remind him tonight when he comes home. He might be able to get a nice last-minute place."

Tihocan spoke up, interrupting the conversation. "Miss Bat, why are your boobs so big?" Rouge smiled, used to being pestered about her chest. "Why are they bigger than her's?" He pointed to Amy.

"Hey!"

"And why doesn't Silver have any?"

"Silver's a boy, sweetheart." The bat patted him on his head. Tihocan looked up at her with a shocked expression.

"Silver's a boy!?" The white hedgehog frowned, offended.

"I know," Amy sighed, shaking her head. "He really shouldn't be marrying Shadow."

"He's marrying Daddy!?" He glanced at Rouge, then Silver, then back at the bat. "Does that make Silver a trans…ves…trial-ite?"

"It's transvestite, honey."

"What!?" Silver jumped to his feet, angry.

Cream tilted her head to the side. Cheese mimicked her. "What's a transvestite?"

"See! I told you marrying him was a bad idea!" Amy stood, pointing an angry finger at the white hedgehog.

Outside, Shadow and Scourge were perched on a branch. The window was open, so it was easy for them to catch onto the conversation. "We should pull a prank on them." The green hedgehog said, flicking a leaf off his jacket. "Something that'll scare them to death."

"Don't do something that'll make Silver call of the wedding."

"Aww, don't worry, Stripes. I'd never ruin your relationship."

"You've done it plenty of times before."

"…"

Silver clenched his fists. "Amy! I didn't come here to fight with you! Why are you concerned about Shadow, anyway? You're supposed to be obsessed with Sonic!"

"But, Sonic's obsessed with Scourge! And, if I'm dating someone else, it might get his attention."

He pointed to Rouge. "Then date a girl! That'll get his attention!"

The bat held up her hands in defense. "I want no part of this."

Scourge sighed. "Ah, I love how Rouge is just so-"

"Shut up!" Shadow growled in a whisper. "I can't hear!"

"Daddy!" Tihocan pointed to the window.

The ebony hedgehog jumped and glanced around him for something to conceal his face. He ripped of a nearby branch and held it in front of him. Scourge merely dropped down to the ground. By the time everyone in the room looked over, they could see nothing. Except white gloves and shining, gold bands.

Silver crossed his arms. He walked over to the window and, using his telekinetic powers, snatched the branch out of Shadow's hands. "Strange. I thought your name implies that you blend in with the darkness."

He shrugged. "Uh, figurative, I guess."

"Get in here." He demanded. "And bring Scourge with you."

"Shit!" The green hedgehog spoke up with a girlish tone. "Sorry! Scourge isn't here right now! He got…arrested!" His shades suddenly levitated off his head. He jumped up to get them, but they were just out of his reach. "Dude! Weak!"

After a brief scolding, the two 'spies' were allowed to remain in the room until the so-called party was over. Scourge wasn't exactly happy with the idea, saying that he wanted to work on his launcher instead of hang around with underage girls. Rouge had somehow convinced him otherwise. Shadow held onto his lover's arm, even though Silver still seemed annoyed by him.

"So," Tihocan had just finished picking all the lemon square crumbs off the plate. "If you're marrying Daddy, does that make you my Mommy?"

Silver shrugged. "I don't think so."

"Can I call you Mommy?"

Scourge let out an annoyed sigh. "Aren't bachelorette parties supposed to be more interesting and…I don't know…have a surprise stripper or something?" He had always seen them in ridiculous TV shows whenever too lazy to change the channel.

"We can't." Rouge said, pointing to Tihocan. "Silver and I are probably the only people old enough for that anyway."

"Yeah," Tihocan placed the plate on his head, trying to balance it. It fell off. "I'm not allowed to look at naked boobies."

Scourge laughed. "I like you, kid. You could learn a lot from Uncle Scourge." He grinned, getting that look that said: I-have-a-bad-idea-lol.

Shadow turned to Tihocan and shook his head. "No. Don't listen to him. Scourge is a bad, bad, bad hedgehog. He lies to people and steals things. He's a no-good rodent who deserves to be in jail."

"I'm right here, Stripes."

"I'm just trying to prove a point."

Tihocan sat beside the green hedgehog. "Is it true that big men named 'Bubba' will rape you if you go to jail?"

"Tihocan!" He turned to Silver. "Who told you that?"

"The TV."

The white hedgehog glanced at his fiancé, who shrugged. "I told not to let him watch too much television!" He playfully punched Shadow's arm.

"What am I going to tell him? 'Read a book?'"

* * *

Spenser stepped out of the portal, greeted by a beaten-up Ford truck. "Betsy! You're…werey. Oh noes! It's nighttime already!" He removed the roach from his back. "We gotta get you back to Boss ASAP!" He tossed it into the bed of the truck and jumped in. "Onward! Betsy, to Sonic's house!" It sped off, causing the porcupine to fall back and land on his bottom. "Ow!" He jumped up, his tail stuck to his backside. "My buttocks! They burn!" The roach flicked its antennas.

The truck startled a certain blue hedgehog when it pulled into the driveway. "Ah!" He dropped what he was holding and backed away. "D-Don't run me over!"

"I wouldn't run you over!" Spenser jumped out of the trunk. "I'd cut you open with a saw and roll around in your blood!" He smiled brightly. "Then I'd eat your liver and rip out your eyes with an ice-cream scooper!" He giggled. "Then I'd feed the remains to Betsy!"

Sonic stared at him, frightened. The yellow porcupine merely stood there with a goofy grin. "That was…oddly graphic."

"I like to play Pokemon."

"Uh… Right, me too." He pointed to the truck sitting in the driveway. "You're back together with her?"

"Who, Betsy? Nah. We broke up. But, we're still friends. As long as I don't shove anything up her muffler. She said she didn't like that."

"I…I don't know how to respond to that."

"Have you seen Scourge anywhere? I owe him a big cockroach."

Sonic chuckled. "No. But, Silver might know where he is." He pointed upward with his thumb. "He's up with the girls on the second floor."

"Thanks. C'mon Mr. Roach." He allowed the insect to crawl onto his arm. Sonic backed away when Spenser passed him to get to the front door. He picked up the chainsaw launcher he had stolen from the green hedgehog and continued on his way to the garage.

Spenser paused just outside the door where the part was being held. "Okay, Mr. Roach. We need to be very nice. Silver's in here. He doesn't like big bugs and he might try to squash you with a giant boot! So," He placed it down. "Stay here until I call you." He burst into the room.

Everyone jumped and whirled to the door, curious. Scourge rubbed his temples. "Spenser…"

"Boss! You're here! C'mon in Mr. Roach!" The insect scurried in. The girls, and Silver, screamed. They rushed onto Amy's bed, shouting loudly about not liking bugs. "Stop being so loud! You're scaring him!"

"Shadow! Kill it!" The white hedgehog turned to find that his fiancé had followed him onto the mattress. "What are you doing? You're supposed to be killing that thing!"

"I don't like bugs." He said softly, ears folded down. "All those legs and eyes…" He shivered.

Scourge was dumbfounded. "I can't believe you found me a three foot cockroach." He spoke in a monotone voice. "You set our fire-proof ship on fire. You married a truck. You found a giant cockroach and brought it back. Everything you've done defies the laws of physics."

"Psshaw! I obey no laws!" He thrust a fist into the air. "I am Spenser! And, I am what I is!"

A boot was thrown at his head, knocking him over. "You're going to be ground meat if you don't get rid of this thing!" Silver pointed to the cockroach that had suddenly taken an interest in his shoe. "Get away from that!" He removed his other boot and whacked the roach repeatedly with it. It darted out of the room.

"Mr. Roach! Come back!" Spenser followed.

* * *

Pokelad- Oh, tell me how to get Sonic from humping Scourge's leg. I might totally just steal it and shove into the continuation. Lawl, thanks for the review!

Silabus' Taco- No! Don't choke and die! I'll be forced to lesser the funny. Thanks for reviewing! XD

Laughter in the Dark - I break _all_the rules. *Is slapped* Thanks for reviewing! And, I'll definitely put Rob in Paradise 3. Gadzooks! XD

Crazy Muffin Assassin - Whew. I'm glad. I was a little worried I played him off as too much of a pussy. Spenser says: 'ARGH! But I want to eat them!' Thanks for the review!

Lise-chan- You'll probably find out in the next chapter. Thanks for reviewing! XD

Cassy the Hedgehog - YES! Actually, he knows when to be serious and when to be silly. Thanks for your review!

XxSkyFoxGirlxX- I'm glad you like Tihocan. He and Spenser are my only two abnormal characters. Aw, I'd tabletish with you. But, my drawing skills fail. XD Sonic Unleashed is very fun. But, the Wii and PS2 versions look stupid compared to the 360 and PS3. I'm pretty sure it's cause of the graphics. (I AM A NERD.) OMG. I dun like Shadow anymore because all of the fangirls that bitch at me because I say Sonic pwns more. The Paradise series always has twenty chapters. I'm pretty sure I haven't replied to some of the things you sent me, but, hey, I'm lazy. XD That's for your outrageously long review!


	20. MARYSUUUE!

OMG. You guys have no idea how long this chapter took me. I'm so sorry it's not epically funny! I was trying to make it that way, but I was failtastic. SADFAIC.

Anyway. This is the last chapter! There will be a third in the series sometime later this year, (Lawl, specific huh?) I hope everyone enjoyed this!

**I R MARRIED LOL**

Shadow had fallen asleep on the couch the previous night, too lazy to make it back up the stairs. He awoke feeling something tickling his side. Believing it to be Silver, he just ignored it. But, it persisted, and began to agitate him. He sat up, removing the blanket to reveal the oversized cockroach had fallen asleep with him. At first, he didn't know what to think of it.

Then, he screamed.

"What!? Where's the fire!?" Scourge dashed into the room with a flamethrower. He had been attempting to fix it and was in the other room trying it out on the stove. It didn't make sense to put out a fire with a fire, but it was the only thing he had close to him. "Stripes, why are you on the ceiling?" He glanced at the couch to find the roach hissing at him. "Ugh. I told Spenser to put that thing away." He casually walked over to the stairs. "Spenser! Get rid of this cockroach!"

"Boss?" Scourge jumped, not realizing the porcupine in question was right beside him. "You don't like my present?"

"No. It's scaring everyone."

"Aww, kay. C'mon Mr. Roach. You gotta go." He picked it up. His eyes shifted from left to right.

"Don't eat it Spenser." The green hedgehog sighed.

"I wasn't gonna eat it!" He paused. "…Raw."

Shadow was rotating along with the ceiling fan. "That's disgusting!"

"Just get rid of it." The porcupine exited the house. Scourge turned to Shadow once he dropped down. "You ready, Stripes? Today's the big day!"

He groaned. Already? It didn't seem like ten days. "Where's Silver?"

"You're not allowed to see him until this afternoon. Sonic will help you get dressed after breakfast." He placed the flamethrower down. "I have to head down to the Church and set everything up. I'll be back to pick you up around noon. Be ready. The wedding starts at one."

"But-" Before he could retort, Scourge had left the house.

Sonic ran down the stairs, violently shaking Shadow's shoulder. "Dude! Spenser ate that giant cockroach!"

The ebony hedgehog sighed. "Somehow that doesn't surprise me." He glanced at the clock on the wall. "Well, let's get this over with." He turned to head up the stairs, but Sonic stopped him.

"Uh, don't you want breakfast first?"

He shrugged. "I'll just eat at the party."

"…A-Are you sure."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Yes." He pushed the blue hedgehog out of his way.

"Shadow, wait!" He quickly followed him, blocking the way to his bedroom.

"What is wrong with you?" He stepped to the side, but Sonic copied him. "Move!" He pulled his rival away and kicked open the door. "…Sonic…what the hell did you do to my tuxedo?" He glanced over his shoulder.

His clothes were laid out neatly on the bed, save for his black jacket. It was scattered around on the floor, ripped to pieces. He picked up what appeared to be the shoulder and stared at it. Sonic crawled into the room, pretending to be innocent. He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. Shadow continued to stare at the mess, horrified. He had rented the tuxedo. He'd have to return it by next week.

"Well, I was trying to fix it with the sewing machine." He paused, laughing again. "But, I didn't know how to operate it…so I just left it." His voice trailed off.

"You destroyed my jacket!"

"I wouldn't say destroyed…exactly." He gazed up at the ceiling and the world around them blurred into nothing.

"…What just happened?" Shadow's voice could be heard.

"Shush. It's a flashback."

Color returned in a different scene. Sonic was using a roller to remove the dust from the tuxedo, which was fixed upon a mannequin. It appeared to be early in the morning, but it was hard to tell. The door opened and Spenser waltzed in holding a large box. He set it down by the blue hedgehog.

"Spenser," He stared. "What is that?" The box seemed to twitch every now and then and animal sounds could be heard from inside it.

"It's a box."

"I can see that. What's in it?"

"Four rabid weasels."

Sonic cocked an eyebrow. "Uh, do you mind taking that somewhere else?" He placed the roller down. "If anything happens to this tux, Shadow will have my head."

"That's your problem." He shrugged. "Sides, I can't keep them in my room because I have too many electoral cords they could chew on."

"Then they'd be happier in your room." He was starting to get annoyed.

Spenser laughed. "Oh no, they'd die if they bit my wires."

"Then why are you keeping them?" His lower eyelid twitched.

"We're going to have a party later on today, duh."

Sonic's anger suddenly turned into disgust."You're going to serve…weasels at the reception?"

"Rabid weasels." He corrected with a prideful grin. "Anyway, I gotta go get Mr. Roach ready, so watch them for me." He skipped out of the room before the blue hedgehog could say anything.

Sonic tried his best to ignore the box, and returned to fixing up his friend's tuxedo. His foot bumped against it, knocking it over. He jumped, desperately hoping they would come out. Thankfully they didn't. He let out a relieved sigh and turned back to the mannequin. After a few more minutes of making sure everything was as it should be, he decided to head downstairs to satisfy his hunger. He fixed himself a steaming bowel of ramen and sat in front of the television as he ate. When he returned upstairs…

The colors suddenly returned to the previous scene of the trashed room. The blue hedgehog shrugged. "I don't how they got out. But, hey! At least I was able to-"

"SONIC!" "What!?"

"Do you have any idea how much this cost me?" Shadow appeared as if he was going to rip his quills out of his head. "I can't go to a wedding without my jacket! Silver will kill me!"

"A-Alright! Calm down. Let's just take some time to think." He placed a finger on his chin.

"Time to think!? I've got one hour!"

Sonic quickly glanced at the clock hanging on the wall. "Oh. Don't worry! I know how we can fix this." The black hedgehog was curious, but afraid to ask. He took the other's silence as an opportunity to continue. "A Mary Sue."

Shadow stood there. "I…" He paused, trying to think of the right words. "I can't think of a response for that."

"Spenser's a fan character – I'm sure he knows one. He could call one over to fix your jacket." Shadow didn't seem to understand. "Mary Sues have extremely amazing powers and they can do just about anything."

He appeared reassured. "You really think she'll be able to help us?"

"Guarantee it. C'mon!" He dragged the ebony hedgehog down the stairs and into the kitchen. "Spenser! We need a favor!" The porcupine looked up, a mouthful of fruit snacks. "Call us one of your Mary Sue friends!"

He swallowed his food. "What? Sorry Sonic, I don't have any Mary Sue friends."

"…You don't?" Sonic sounded disappointed.

"Nah. I'm allergic to Mary Sues and cardboard cutout characters." He took a sip of a juice box.

Shadow stood beside him, arms crossed. "Great. Now what are we going t-"

"ACHOO!" Spenser sniffed, forgetting to cover his mouth as he sneezed.

The blue hedgehog snickered. He immediately shut himself up when Shadow glared at him. "Any more 'brilliant' plans, Sonic?"

He shrugged. "We could just go to the mall and find one."

"Yeah." Spenser nodded. "Mary Sues always hang out at the mall with their friends. They're extreme fashions designers. Anything they tell a girl to wear makes them instantly drop-dead gorgeous, even if they were hideous to begin with."

Shadow grinned. "Is that what happened to you?" The porcupine glanced over at the black hedgehog, a serious expression on his face. He stepped away. It was so unnatural to see him without a smile that it was scary.

"Why?" His smile returned, but it was a creepy one. "Do you find me…attractive, Shadow?"

"Uh," Sonic pointed over his shoulder. "I'll be waiting outside."

* * *

They made it to the plaza with thirty minutes before the ceremony. "I don't think Spenser likes me." Shadow glanced into random stores as they walked around.

"Honestly, I find it hard for Spenser to dislike anything. Oh!" Sonic tugged the ebony hedgehog's fur. "There's one!" He pointed to a hedgehog that appeared exactly like Amy, with the exception of her color scheme. Her fur was blue and her dress was brown. The headband and shoes she wore were also the same shade of light brown, tan almost. She had one grey eye and one green eye. "Let's hurry before Scourge finds out what happened."

Wait, that was a good idea. "Why don't we just go back and wait for Scourge? I'm sure he could figure something out."

Sonic shook his head. "Nah, that's too easy. Hey, Aqua!" He called out to the blue Amy, who surprisingly responded to him.

"How do you know her name?"

"Pfft. She's blue. It was either Aqua, Sky, or Icey." He spoke in an intelligent manner.

"Hey. Did you call me Sonic?" She batted her eyelashes, but it didn't seem to have an effect on the blue hero. "Can you sew together a tuxedo jacket in less than twenty minutes?"

"Anything for Shadow." She winked.

"…Right…" He backed away from her. Shadow had heard stories about Mary Sues: they captured the attention of their victim and forced them to fall in love regardless of their feelings. They were forced to do stupid, unrealistic things, like marry a hedgehog from a different time period. In other words, it was torture.

Sonic leaned over to the black hedgehog, whispering. "Don't stare at her for too long, you'll fall victim to her spell."

* * *

Meanwhile, Scourge was returning to the house, snatching the fruit snacks from Spenser. "You'll spoil your lunch. The cake's set up and everything is ready. Where's Stripes?" He looked around. "Stripes! Let's go! I know it's a little earlier than I said, but Silver wants to speed the ceremony up so the party lasts longer!" He paused, waiting for a response. "Stripes?" He sighed and turned to the porcupine, who had yet another mouthful of candy. "Did you kill him?"

"N-No! Not yet, at least." He growled. "My main enemy right now is Ben the AssKicker…" His voice trailed off.

The green hedgehog shook his head. As he was heading to the stairs, Sonic burst through the door. "Hey, perfect timing Blue. Have you seen Shadow?"

He smiled. "Oh, hey Scourge. Wait…Scourge?" There was a brief pause between them. "AGH!" He slammed the door shut. "Dude," He turned to Shadow. "Scourge is in there!"

"What!? But we've got fifteen minutes!"

"Quick, Aqua!" He pointed to the window. "Use your telekinesis to get us into that window!" She complied, and they ended up back in the cobalt hero's room. "Hurry, put this back together!" He picked up a few of the tuxedo pieces and shoved them into her arms. "I'll got stall Scourge!" Sonic swiftly exited the room, greeted by the green hedgehog. "Scourge!" He closed his room door and stood in front of it. "Hey. What's up?"

"I should be asking you that." He cocked an eyebrow. "Silver's waiting. We should leave now before he gets…too…" He stepped to the side, trying to reach the door, but Sonic mimicked him. "What are you doing?"

"…Practicing my…dance…steps?"

"You can't dance."

"That's why I have to practice!" He did a few moves and twirled around.

"Oh. I can teach you how to waltz." The green hedgehog took hold of his twin and spun him around. "Step back." Sonic complied, and was pushed down the stairs. "We'll meet you at the Church." He knocked on the door. "Stripes! Don't make me come in there!"

Shadow immediately exited the room, neatly dressed in his tuxedo. "Sorry. I was fixing my tie and couldn't hear you."

"Tell me the next time Spenser brings rabid weasels into the house." He said, arms crossed.

"He's bought rabid weasels before?" Shadow shook his head. Somehow, that didn't surprise him.

Silver didn't like long ceremonies, which was a good thing because Shadow didn't either. It took place outside by a beautiful array of flowers and candle decorations. Everyone was seated in neat rows. They were dressed formally, of course, save for Knuckles and Spenser, who had fallen asleep against his truck. Sonic began impatiently tapping his foot as they were exchanging their vows, and was elbowed in the stomach a few times by Scourge. Eventually, they said 'I do' and kissed. Immediately afterward, the blue hedgehog sped off, unable to keep still for the full forty minutes.

No one seemed to mind his hasty leave. "So, Shadow." Silver smiled, staring loving into his husband's eyes. "Where are we going for our honeymoon?"

Shadow's eyes widened. "Uh, well, you see…"

Silver's voice became dull. "You didn't get us a vacation spot?"

"Scourge said he'd handle that!" The white hedgehog released Shadow, glancing over to Scourge.

"Did you, Scourgey?"

"Well, when I went to the website I-" He stopped short and ran away.

"Some friend you are!" He looked at Silver, who seemed angry. "Okay, look. We'll go back home and-" Just like the green hedgehog, Shadow ran, using his shoes to propel him further.

The white hedgehog stood at the altar, angry. Spenser crawled over to him and slipped the bouquet out of his hand. He slowly shoved it into his mouth and crawled away.

* * *

Pokelad - Yeah. Tihocan's too young for everything. Thanks! And I promise I'll use your idea for Scourge.

Crazy Muffin Assassin - Pimped slapped by SPENSER! Ch'yeah. Thanks for reviewing!

Laughter in the Dark - Sounds like fun! I've never been to one. They kind of scare me. Thanks for your review! I eats it with all my love.

Revwal - You know, it doesn't make much sense that I'm making you destroy me. Curse you with your intelligence and Russian accent! And, thanks for you review. You should do it more often. HINTHINTHINT.


	21. Extra: Alternate Ending

Short, but sorta funny. Yeah, enjoy.

**Alternate Ending!**

The church bell gonged loudly, waking a certain yellow porcupine from his slumber. "Steal the bride!" He shouted, stepping on the others in their chairs and running up to the altar. He scooped up Silver and flung him over his shoulder. "To the tree house! Betsy!" The red Hummer drove up to him without a driver. He hoped into the backseat. The engine roared and they sped off.

"What the hell just happened?" Scourge asked no one in particular. He glanced at Sonic.

"Seriously, what is wrong with him?"

Shadow, who appeared extremely angry, chased after the truck. "Spenser! Get back here with my husband!"

"Should we do something?"

"Nah, Stripes can handle everything himself."


	22. Extra: Deleted Scenes

Some of these make you go 'DANG. I'm glad you didn't put that in, Lotus.'

**Deleted Scenes**

**Some part of Chapter 3 that was rewritten.  
**Blaze seemed to be in a better mood than she was yesterday, PMS Shadow supposed. She looked extremely bored, and for a moment he almost felt sorry for her, until he remembered that he hated her. Silver couldn't contain his excitement and started shouting on what his wedding would be like. She chuckled, shaking her head at her friend's proclaimed future.

"But! Until we can convince Daddy, I wanted Shadow to stay here with you." She nodded. "I mean, as long as you don't mind."

"Well, it might be hard explaining this to everyone, seeing as how Shadow is supposed to be dead."

"I'm dead!?"

"But, I can figure something out as long as he promises to –"

"Whoa, I'm dead!?" Shadow was shocked. "I'm the Ultimate Lifeform, I can't die!"

Blaze ignored him. "As long as he promises to do his share around the palace." Shadow started shouting about having to work for everyone just to have a place to stay. "Well, if you had a job."

"A job!? Half of this world is completely destroyed! Where the hell am I going to find a job?" Blaze stood up and outstretched her arms, showing him the only place where a job could be found. "Silver, are you really going to do this to me?"

Silver crossed his arms. "Shadow! Don't be lazy! It's a bad trait for a husband!"

"But, I don't want to be a maid!"

Blaze tapped her chin. "Can you cook?" He shook his head. "You're just saying that." His ears drooped. "It doesn't matter anyway. We'll have someone teach you." He sighed. Great.

* * *

**What would've happened had Shadow won the fight with Elly in Chapter 8.  
**"No!" Silver stopped him, arms outstretched. He skidded to a stop, not wanting to hurt his fiancé. Ellsworth struggled to stand, but his injured leg prevented that. "Please don't kill him!" Shadow stepped back. He was stunned by the tears forming in the white hedgehog's eyes.

"Silver, move."

"No!" He shook his head. "I won't let you hurt him anymore!"

"Move!"

"He's my father!" Shadow stepped back again, dumbfounded. "I know you don't like him, but he's my Daddy. I love him just as much as I love you." Ellsworth sat upright, holding onto his leg and hissing in pain. "You can't do this to me! He's the only family I have left!" The black hedgehog lowered the sword.

"I don't have any family. I turned out fine."

Silver glared. "I'm a different situation. Shadow, I killed my mother." He sniffed, wiping his tears away. "I can't forgive myself for what I've done. I won't have anything left if Daddy is gone."

"Then why weren't you living with him before?"

"Because," He paused, swallowing hard. "I didn't realize how much I had missed him." Shadow glanced over his fiancé's shoulder at the fallen hedgehog. "Please, don't screw up my life anymore."

* * *

**A chapter I could find room for. Yeah, it's about coffee.  
**Shadow's morning started the way things should: he awoke beside his fiancé, who was half buried under the covers. However, everything began to get weird after that. But, not like the normal type of American weird. Oh no. This is the crazy, stereotypical Asian insane weird. Without the smartness. Kinda describes the author, doesn't it?

Moving on. Ellsworth was already up. He was seated at the kitchen table, reading a book while he waited for the beeping of a certain coffee machine. Shadow was intrigued by the scent.

"French vanilla…nice." He took a seat across from his fiancé's father. "Pour me a cup when it's ready."

Ellsworth cocked an eyebrow. "Excuse me? You should be the one making me coffee. It's the least you could do to make up for embarrassing yourself at the Ring yesterday." Shadow growled under his breath, not wanting to remember their fight.

You know what? I have something to say to you!"

"Shh!" The large hedgehog cut him off, shaking his head. "Quiet! Don't let Silver hear you!" It was Shadow's turn to lift his eyebrow. "It's like this: my son believes coffee is hazardous to our health. If he finds out we're drinking it," He paused, sighing sadly. "I'll never hear the end of it. He's just like his mother… So be quiet!"

"Is that why you're up at five in the morning?" Ellsworth nodded.

Coffee had a rather lasting affect on the both of them. Silver's father couldn't work without it. It was like an addiction after some point. Shadow, on the other hand, enjoyed the drink as something that would wake him up. He was already cranky enough; so not drinking it would be just as fine with him.

About thirty minutes later, Ellsworth was drinking his fourth cup. Shadow had hardly finished his first. And, to top it all off, a second batch was being made on the counter. The only sound that could be heard was Scourge's snoring and the water dripping into the coffee pot. A moment later, the black hedgehog's ears perked up.

"Sounds like Silver is awake." He said, yawning and watching as Ellsworth frantically tried to hide the remaining coffee. He took a sip from his cup before it was snatched by the taller hedgehog. "Hey…I was drinking that." Shadow's reaction was a little slow today.

"Morning ev-" Silver stopped in mid-sentence. He stood beside his lover, noticing a strange scent in the air. "Daddy…have you been drinking coffee?"

"Pssh. N-No." Ellsworth rubbed the back of his neck. "That smell is…Uh…Shadow!" The ebony hedgehog looked up, fully awake. "Yeah, he didn't take a shower last night."

"Yes I did. I remember because Silver was with me."

"You took a shower with my son?" Silver's cheeks turned a bright shade of pink. "Remind me to kick your ass later."

"Why the hell would I remind you to kick my ass?"

* * *

**Shadow locked himself in the bathroom in Chapter 7.  
**Ellsworth pulled the two apart before they could rip out each other's fur. "Silver… Dare I ask what is going on?"

Silver struggled loose from his father's grip. He growled at Amy, ears back. "She's trying to steal my Shadow from me!"

"I wouldn't be trying if you just left him alone!"

Silver gasped. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Shadow was supposed to be _my _boyfriend! He was supposed to save _me_ from Mephiles! He was supposed to propose to _me_!" Ellsworth used this opportunity to sneak into the kitchen. He was confident his son knew how to handle such a situation. At least, he hoped his son could…in a mature manner…well, in a slightly mature manner.

"First off, Shadow asked me out! And, I was never kidnapped by Mephiles! That was Sonic." Silver crossed his arms. "Why would he choose to marry someone like you? You're selfish, inconsiderate, mean, and you nag too much!"

While the two argued, Ellsworth poured himself a cup of coffee. He sipped it, listening to them. Amy argued about how she was perfect for Shadow. His son just shouted insults. The more he thought about it, the less of an argument it was. They weren't really arguing about anything, they were just shouting at each other. A minute later, he noticed something that was out of place.

"Shadow…get out of the bathroom."

"Not until Amy leaves!"

He sighed and placed down the warm cup. Ellsworth picked her up by the collar of her kimono and led her outside. "I'm sorry ma'am. This house is off-limits to anyone who pisses off either my son or me. And, you've done both. Have a good day." He slammed the door in her face before she could say anything.

* * *

**Another deleted part from Chapter 7.  
**Ellsworth arrived just in time to save Amy from being beaten to death by his son. "Silver! What are you doing?"

The white hedgehog growled, pointing a finger at her. "She's trying to steal my husband!"

"I wouldn't be trying if you just left him alone!"

Silver gasped. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Shadow was supposed to be _my _boyfriend! He was supposed to save _me_ from Mephiles! He was supposed to propose to _me_!" Ellsworth used this opportunity to sneak into the kitchen. He was confident his son knew how to handle such a situation. At least, he hoped his son could…in a mature manner…well, in a slightly mature manner.

"First off, Shadow asked me out! And, I was never kidnapped by Mephiles! That was Sonic." Silver crossed his arms. "Why would he choose to marry someone like you? You're selfish, inconsiderate, mean, and you nag too much!"

"You nag too, Silver!" Ellsworth's ears perked up at the familiar voice. He glanced around, but couldn't figure out where it came from.

"Why would he choose you!? Same sex relationships never work!"

"Shadow," Ellsworth knocked on the bathroom door. "Get out of there."

The ebony hedgehog poked his head out of the room. "Are they done arguing?"

Silver's father held up a finger. "One second." He walked into the other room, grabbed both Amy and his son by their arms, led them out of the house, and closed the door. "They're done."

Shadow looked out the window. "That was rude."

"Silver can take care of himself."

* * *

**Something funky happened as the crew returned from their adventure in Chapter 14.  
**"Daddy! Wait, what are you doing here?" Silver jumped down. His foot slipped when he landed and he ended up falling on his backside. His father helped him up.

"You're home."

Scourge leaned over the side of the ship. "No way! We went all the way around the world!?" He paused, standing upright. "Damn, the world is small."

"Actually," Ellsworth brushed the dirt off his son, but Silver pushed him away, embarrassed. "You guys just went around in a circle. I could see you from here. And, you were only gone for an hour."

Shadow growled at the green hedgehog. "Who's the stupid one now? Next time bring a map."

"B-But, I had Spenser!" As Scourge said this, a porcupine covered in a white cloth came from behind, making strange 'Oooo' sounds.

"Oooo! I'm a ghost!"

"Spenser…put the sail back."

"Aww…"

* * *

**What almost happened at the beginning of Chapter 11.  
**"AHH!" Spenser ran onto the deck. He was failing his arms wildly, screaming, and running from Silver. "Rape!" He jumped over the railing and off the ship. The white hedgehog followed him. "Hot!" He was levitated back onto the deck. His bushy tail was on fire. "HotHotHotHot!"

"Hold still!" Silver was holding a bucket filled with water. He poured it on Spenser's tail to put the fire out. "Scourgey!"

The green hedgehog was sipping on a cup of coffee downstairs. His ears perked up when he heard Silver's voice. Deciding to find out what was wrong, he exited the kitchen and walked passed Shadow's room. "Wha?" He paused and turned back to the room. "Stripes?" There was silence between the two. Scourge removed his shades to make sure what he was seeing wasn't caused by the lighting. "Zombie!" He rushed onto the deck and tackled Spenser. "I told you to mess with Silver not turn Stripes into a walking, rotting zombie-hog!"

"Does this mean I don't get my thirty bucks?"

"What happened to Shadow?" Worried, Silver dashed down the steps.

"Spenser…" Scourge stood. "Why is the boat moving?" The porcupine sat up and shrugged.

Back downstairs, Silver was busy trying to pull his fiancé into an upright position. "Oh, Shadow! Are you alright? What happened? Did you get bit by a zombie-rat? How many fingers am I holding up?" Shadow looked at the white hedgehog's hand and covered his mouth. "Oh, okay. Just lay down. I'll be right back."

He rushed up the steps, back to Scourge. He passed his father, who was eating a box of crackers. "Hi Daddy."

"Yup."

"Scourgey. I think Shadow is – Daddy?" Silver turned back to his father. Scourge cocked an eyebrow. He didn't understand the sentence until he noticed Ellsworth. "When did you get here?"

"I pushed the ship into the lava ocean. What's wrong with Shadow?" He brushed the cracker crumbs off his hands and closed the box.

"He's a zombie! And, he's going to eat us!" Spenser screamed, pointing to the hedgehog in question who had somehow found the strength to climb up the steps. Ellsworth started to laugh.

"Daddy! That's not funny! Shadow, go lay down! Scourgey, go-" Silver was cut off by his father, who held up a hand to silence him.

He walked over to Shadow and placed the back on his hand on the sick hedgehog's forehead. He fell over, vomiting. Scourge had a disgusted look on his face. Spenser threw his hands in the air. "Awesome!"

"Shadow! Oh, that's so gross!" Silver covered his eyes.

"Don't worry. He's just seasick." He helped Shadow back to his feet. "That's why he's green. He's not a zombie." He paused for a moment, grinning. "I have the perfect remedy. Be back." He traveled down the steps.

Silver pushed Spenser toward the steps. "Go follow him and make sure he doesn't put poison in whatever he's making!"

"But, I don't wanna! He might sit on me!" He grabbed onto Silver's shoulders and started wailing. "I don't want to die like that!" He was pulled to his feet by Scourge and slapped across the face.

"Knock it off! Besides, Ellsworth isn't big enough to crush you by sitting on you." He paused and crossed his arms. "He could probably eat you though." Spenser's ears drooped.

Five minutes later, Ellsworth returned with a cup of green slop. Shadow's face became paler when he caught sight of it. He held it out to the sick hedgehog. "Drink this. It'll make you feel better." He noticed the skeptical look he was receiving. "Trust me." He shook his head. "Shadow, trust me. I'm a father." Silver's father shoved the cup in his hands. "Drink it." He demanded.


End file.
